We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Abigail Dowell a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.
Abigail, we’re thrilled to have you on our platform and we think there is so much folks can learn from you and your story. Something that matters deeply to us is living a life and leading a career filled with purpose and so let’s start by chatting about how you found your purpose.
Looking back, I don’t think there is a specific time when I could say I “found” my purpose. I genuinely feel that my purpose found me through introspection, life changes, taking inventory – and a little therapy! As I constantly seek self-improvement and ways to be a better version of myself, finding a purpose has been quite a journey rather than a destination. That said, I can look back on my life and see milestones that have brought clarity to the road I was following, and I made quite a few U-turns!
I started my career with a bachelor’s degree in accounting and worked in the corporate world in accounting and IT. Buried in spreadsheets and black-and-white data, I found purpose in bringing shades of gray through interpretation and communication. I managed productivity and bottom lines, which is purposeful but leaves much to be desired regarding personal fulfillment.
Becoming a parent threw the idea of “purpose” from shades of gray to polychrome. There are no black-and-white certainties when raising children, but I still sought out solid information via books on brain development. Books like The Whole Brain Child by Dan Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson were my holy transcripts for parenting and introduced a significant shift in priorities and goals. My singular purpose became wrapped up in nourishing the bodies and minds of these two precious gifts.
When it came time to return to the workforce, black-and-white no longer appealed to me. I allowed myself to jump into the unknown and seek ways to honor the helper I had always been. Going through my own therapeutic journey helped me uncover who I was and helped me discover who I wanted to be while raising many questions about purpose and career moves. At this time, a friend asked me, “If you could do anything you wanted, what would you do?” There was no question or hesitation – “I want to be a therapist.” So, with a 4-year-old and a 1-year-old in tow, I went to grad school to earn my master’s degree in clinical mental health counseling to pursue that goal.
By permitting myself to pivot, I can say I’m finally in a career that is as fulfilling as it is purposeful. I couldn’t have done it without the cheerleaders in my life, namely my husband, who nudged me to take leaps of faith and provided an environment where I had few limits to explore changing directions. Being flexible and embracing change moved me from the black and white of my metaphorical Kansas to the Technicolor dreamworld of Oz. Living life is my purpose. Developing and growing as a human is my purpose. Evolving intellectually and spiritually is my purpose. And now, helping other people discover their own is my purpose. It’s a journey that never ends.
Thanks, so before we move on maybe you can share a bit more about yourself?
I am a Licensed Professional Counselor-Associate (under the supervision of Kelsey D’Amore, MS, LPC-S,RPT) working at a fantastic practice called Connect to Thrive. I have been working with this practice for a few months and love everything about it. The vibe is laid back and serene, welcoming and warm, which is precisely what I want to communicate to my clients. I want to create an environment that breeds trust and sincerity. Many clients come in seeking something but sometimes aren’t quite sure what that is. Sometimes, you must trudge through some dark spaces to find the light to illuminate the next step. I hope my clients trust me to walk with them through their journeys so they can become vulnerable enough to be honest with themselves. I’ve sat on the other side of the room as a client and know how hard it is to do that yourself. In the next few weeks, I will finish EMDR training, and I’m excited to offer this to my clients as a way to get to that next step. I have openings, and I’m ready to fill them!
Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
The three most important qualities that have been essential throughout my journey have been flexibility, openness, and determination. Each time the road bends, leaning into the curve and pushing through is critical. There will be forks in the road; you must remain open to each route’s possibilities and allow yourself the flexibility to turn around if it feels wrong. Sometimes, the path goes uphill, and you must be determined to use every tool you can to get over the summit. If you are standing at the bottom of the mountain, take inventory of what tools you have to use, get your mind right, and know excitement lies along the way. Being at the top of the mountain is rewarding, but the joy is in the journey.
Who has been most helpful in helping you overcome challenges or build and develop the essential skills, qualities or knowledge you needed to be successful?
Without a doubt, I wouldn’t be where I am without my spouse. I never would have had the flexibility to pivot without his flexibility to accommodate that. Whenever I thought I couldn’t keep going, he helped me up and nudged me forward. When I signed up for grad school with two young children, he filled in the gaps and listened to me geek out on the latest things I was learning. He gave me two beautiful children who inspired my passion for this new field and encouraged me each time I felt I wasn’t good enough. He’s been there for the highs and the lows and is my easy silence when my overwhelm starts sneaking up.
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