We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Kaamilah Mixon. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Kaamilah below.
Hi Kaamilah, thank you so much for joining us today. There are so many topics we could discuss, but perhaps one of the most relevant is empathy because it’s at the core of great leadership and so we’d love to hear about how you developed your empathy?
I’d like to begin answering this question with what empathy means to me. Empathy is the ability to understand what someone feels in any given situation, especially difficult ones. I consider myself an empathetic person as I take time to reflect and ponder what others go through and how it affects them. There are a few experiences that allowed me to develop my empathy and to continue to do so. As a child I was raised in a predominantly single parent household (with my mother and four siblings), experienced different familial conflicts, relocated residences frequently, and experienced a traumatic situation after turning 13 wherein my mother’s former boyfriend attempted to pimp me out. These four experiential dynamics resulted in me not having much of a voice at times because I was attempting to keep the peace at home, get adjusted to new environments, and make sense out of feeling violated by someone who was like a father figure. I must say it makes me kind of nervous sharing about this right now yet speaking up has allowed me to develop empathy for myself and others. When I was attending the University of Central Florida as a social work major there were two things that stuck out to me: Maslow’s hierarchy of needs and adverse childhood experiences (ACEs). Maslow’s hierarchy of needs speaks to needs that individuals have and posit that if they go unmet, mental and physical health issues can arise. The ACEs is a trauma test that gives a score based on how many of the traumatic experiences one has experienced in their childhood. This test posits that certain traumatic experiences in childhood can lead to negative long-term effects related one’s health. Once I became adept at doing self-assessments as well as seeking counsel to better understand the impact of my childhood experiences on me as an adult my empathy continued to develop. Whether I can relate to someone’s personal experience or not I have developed the capacity to use my imaginative and thoughtful space to explore how they might feel and be impacted by their experiences.
Appreciate the insights and wisdom. Before we dig deeper and ask you about the skills that matter and more, maybe you can tell our readers about yourself?
I wear different hats and they all provide immense excitement and fulfillment! I am a social worker and I work in three different elementary schools wherein I provide evaluative assessments for exceptional student education, interventions to ensure students are attending school, student check ins, individual and group counseling, resources for families etc. Being a social worker is so exciting and special to me and it makes me emotional because I had to fight and defend my choice in social work and it has transformed my life tremendously. There is truly nothing else I’d rather be doing when it comes to having a positive impact on children and families in educational spaces. I am truly convinced that education is such an important foundation in all of life’s experiences. Being a social worker I am always learning and refining myself in regards to how I communicate and relate with people in general. I think the most important trait that I get to develop in my profession besides empathy is emotional intelligence. It’s a very exciting and special thing to be instrumental in the field of social work. I am also a model, dancer, and poet. As a model I represent different designer’s fashions at runway shows and photo shoots. As a dancer I’ve focused a lot, especially over the past 5 years, on developing different styles of dance (my favorite will always be freestyle!) in choreography based classes. As a poet I explore my perceptions through spoken word and I spend time in open mic spaces sharing what I write. I have to say this is such an opportune time for me to be invited onto this platform as I am beginning to find more structure in terms of my different areas of practice and expertise and I am beginning to think more about my brand. Before getting into new things happening, I’d like to say my developing brand/art/work is rooted in providing safe spaces for authentic self-expression and the exploration of what is fulfilling for the people who engage with me. Also it’s such an exciting and fulfilling creative journey being able to cultivate my my interests and passions through these art forms. It keeps my brain and body agile and my spirit refreshed.
A couple of new things: there is an open mic called Fiyah Sundayz that began in October and occurs on the first Sunday of the month. It takes place in historic Eatonville, FL at a vegan restaurant called Dajen Eats from 6 pm- 8 pm. I hosted for January and it was my first experience as a host and it was a phenomenal feel good growth experience so if artistic expression, specifically poetry and music brings you to life it is definitely an event worth checking out. Lastly, I will begin teaching a dance classed titled “Movement Medicine Dance Workshop” which will promote wellbeing, mindfulness, creativity and somatic awareness through choreography and freestyle based movements. The music selection will be multigenre with songs from the African & BIPOC (Black & Indigenous People of Color) Diaspora. My first class will be on March 29th, 2024 at 7 pm at Three Masks Inc. in Orlando, FL.
There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?
Three qualities that have been most impactful on my journey are courage, flexibility, and emotional intelligence. The first thing I’d say is to always be your own best friend and as cliche as it is it provides the scaffolding for any of these qualities to be most effective, in my perspective. So many things require courage: sometimes being yourself, meeting new people, starting school, getting a new job, going to therapy, investing in yourself etc. Developing courage happens through doing the things that are important to your growth, development and progress even if there is fear involved. What helps me is thinking about where I want to be in 3 or 6 months and if I don’t do something out of fear then that hinders my progress. Next is flexibility which goes hand in hand with resilience for me. It’s the ability to change your methods towards accomplishing something yet staying true to who you are and your goals. It’s the ability to embrace different ideas that you may have never pondered that could help you increase your personal and professional efficiency. Imagine a situation that derails your plans; flexibility gives your mind the space to process the situation with a perspective of everything still working out for you on the other side of it. Finally, emotional intelligence is a quality that I can go on and on about. What I will say is that from observation as a social worker and in life in general, people sometimes suppress their emotions based on different reasons. If emotions are being suppressed they are not being understood, integrated and utilized for our growth and fulfillment. I encourage anyone reading to feel your emotions, learn how emotions show up in your body, and don’t allow embarrassment or misunderstanding to stop you from expressing what you feel. Your emotions are valid and I truly think it makes for well-rounded intelligence to know how to articulate them.
Looking back over the past 12 months or so, what do you think has been your biggest area of improvement or growth?
In the past 12 months so much growth and improvement has happened for me. The biggest area of growth would have to be my personal relationships. I’ve grown so much in my self-worth, my value, my discernment, and the fact that I absolutely enjoy wearing my heart on my sleeve. I endured many different relationships that served as character refinement and through the empathy I’ve developed, through developing courage, flexibility and emotional intelligence in my personal and professional endeavors, my relationships have transformed for the better. I speak on solitude often because during my twenties I spent a number of years to myself, guarding my heart because of painful relating experiences and through years of therapy and having the courage to open my heart again I’ve developed beautiful friendships and a beautiful romance ❤️.
Contact Info:
- Instagram: mysticinnergy
- Facebook: Kaamilah Mixon
- Linkedin: Kaamilah Mixon
Image Credits
Trinity (Instagram: @tysnapped) Bruno (Instagram: @brunothebionicman)
