Meet Joanne De Simone

We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Joanne De Simone. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Joanne below.

Hi Joanne, thanks for sharing your insights with our community today. Part of your success, no doubt, is due to your work ethic and so we’d love if you could open up about where you got your work ethic from?
My work ethic comes straight from my upbringing. My father died when I was young. My mother was abruptly forced into the role of a single parent/breadwinner. She was a child of the Great Depression. Like many people of that generation, she learned to work hard, to do without, and to appreciate the value of family. From her, I learned to follow my passions and to believe that hard work leads to good things, even if the end result doesn’t exactly reflect your original plans. You can survive devastating circumstances by immersing yourself in the duality of grief and joy. These lessons supported my drive to begin a dance career at the age of nineteen, then to shift to special education, and they most definitely helped me when I decided to start writing a book when I was forty-four.

Thanks, so before we move on maybe you can share a bit more about yourself?
As I say on my blog, Special-EducationMom.com, special education is my life. I currently work as a parent advocate for the Alliance of Private Special Education Schools of North Jersey. My goal is to help parents navigate the special education system and understand their rights. Many days I’m an ear for parents who feel unheard, disrespected, and who’ve hit a wall in their effort to advocate for their children. Sometimes, they just need to know they aren’t alone and that there’s someone who understands what they are going through. As a parent with two children who have disabilities, I have experienced all these same emotions. I am honored that they share their stories, fears, and grief with me, and I’m looking forward to sharing my book with them. Fall and Recovery: Raising Children with Disabilities Through Lessons Learned in Dance will be published in September 2024.

There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?
First, I would say I had a willingness to follow my curiosity. I didn’t know anything about writing a book, but along with having a strong drive to put my story on paper, I had a deep curiosity about the creative process and the publishing business. It’s much more comfortable to focus on feeding curiosity as opposed to merely wanting success. Second, I allowed myself to be persistent even when I was overwhelmed. As a special educator, I learned how to analyze a task and break it down into manageable steps. It’s a skill that allows you to set a goal and the path to get there. It allows you to invest in the journey. Third, the ability to be patient. I am not an innately patient person, but I learned that creativity cannot be forced or rushed. It must be allowed. Every project needs to grow, mature, and encounter moments of joy and dissatisfaction. Trust the process. It took me six years to complete my book. It transformed into something I never could have imagined because I was patient enough to let it develop and reveal itself.

Awesome, really appreciate you opening up with us today and before we close maybe you can share a book recommendation with us. Has there been a book that’s been impactful in your growth and development?
The book that influenced me most during the process of writing my memoir is The Last Lecture by Randy Pausch. Randy Pausch was a professor at Carnegie Mellon who gave “a last lecture” about achieving childhood dreams. He was the father of three who was dying of pancreatic cancer. I am especially drawn to stories written by people who are facing death. I once heard someone in publishing say that no one wants to read a story with a sad ending. I struggled with that idea because I set out to write a book about dealing with conflict and living with situations that don’t have a classic happy ending. I appreciate books like The Last Lecture that contradict the “happily ever after” fantasy. Personally, I think most people are attracted to stories about struggle, even when we aren’t guaranteed a resolution. Who doesn’t slow down to get a glimpse of the car accident on the highway? There’s an interest in seeing others in their most vulnerable state.

Pausch said, “The brick walls are there for a reason. They’re not there to keep us out. The brick walls are there to give us a chance to show how badly we want something.” When someone or something is creating a brick wall and challenging your ability to accomplish a dream, I think it’s helpful to push aside the anger you would direct at the source and focus on thinking outside the box in order to succeed. It speaks to the need to acquire flexibility in action but rigidity in focus. This speaks to me as an advocate and a writer.

Pausch also speaks a great deal about his childhood football coach. He took the lessons he learned as an athlete and applied them to life. It inspired me to take a closer look at the lessons I learned in dance, apply them to motherhood, and serve as the structure of my memoir.

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Headshot Credit: Art by Corie

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