Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Kathleen Killen. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.
Kathleen, we sincerely appreciate you joining us today and agreeing to talk about some very personal topics. So, to kick things off, let’s talk about a tough one – divorce. Can you talk to us about how you overcame divorce?
I remember when I first separated from my husband, I was deep in grief, and I just wanted to know when the pain would end. I made a very conscious decision to use this painful experience in my life as an opportunity for growth. But I knew in order to grow from this major life event, I would need to feel the pain and not avoid it. So, I did. It wasn’t easy and it required a lot of work on my part to go inwards instead of look for external sources to soothe my discomfort. Overcoming my divorce wasn’t a fast process. Not only did my marriage end in divorce, but I also became a single mother to a four-year-old overnight. The week after that happened, the pandemic hit and the first lockdown came into effect. There were times when I didn’t know if I would overcome this part of my life. But I did. I decided to make something of my life and use this time to help others. I began coaching other women who were going through divorce – this happened organically when other women started reaching out to me. Then, I became a certified coach. My coaching practice grew and I decided I wanted to go deeper with clients, so I quit my job and went back to school to get my Masters and become a psychotherapist. That brings me to today, where I have my own psychotherapy practice specializing in relationships, am the co-host of a successful podcast, and I am thriving. Was it easy? It wasn’t. But I wouldn’t change a thing.
Let’s take a small detour – maybe you can share a bit about yourself before we dive back into some of the other questions we had for you?
As a dedicated psychotherapist, my passion lies in guiding couples and individuals through challenging moments in their relationships. Specializing in couples therapy, I focus primarily on reconnecting partners who feel distanced from one another. My approach involves delving deep into the roots of their disconnection, facilitating healing, and collaboratively mapping out a path forward. For couples facing the tough choice of separation, I offer support to navigate those complex emotions and decisions. When working with individuals, my goal is to aid them in rediscovering themselves within the context of their relationships – be it with a partner, family members, or within themselves. This journey of self-discovery and healing is what makes my work not just a profession, but a true calling.
Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
In reflecting on the defining moments and qualities of my journey, I identify courage, resilience, and the ability to genuinely connect with others as the most impactful. Courage was the initial spark – it was about stepping into the unknown, embracing vulnerability, and daring to dream beyond the conventional. This courage wasn’t a momentary burst but a sustained force that allowed me to face challenges head-on, even when the outcomes were uncertain.
Resilience has been equally crucial. It’s the grit and perseverance that saw me through setbacks and hardships. It’s not just about bouncing back but also growing from each experience, learning to adapt, and finding strength in adversity.
Lastly, the skill of genuinely connecting with others has been a linchpin in my journey. This isn’t just about effective communication; it’s about cultivating empathy, understanding diverse perspectives, and building trust. In my profession, this skill is invaluable as it enables me to reach into the hearts of those I work with, creating a space for healing and growth.
Together, these qualities have not just shaped my professional journey, but they’ve also been a guide for my personal evolution.
For those embarking on their own paths, I’d emphasize the importance of introspection, especially in understanding the motivations behind your actions. Ask yourself: are my decisions driven by fear or by love? In my experience, it was the courage to choose love over fear that truly propelled me forward. It wasn’t just a love for my work, but a deep-seated love for life and an earnest desire to make a difference in the lives of others. This love fueled my resilience and helped me foster meaningful connections, which are essential in my field. To anyone at the start of their journey, I recommend embracing these values and letting them guide you, as they did for me.
Before we go, any advice you can share with people who are feeling overwhelmed?
Whenever I feel overwhelmed, it serves as a cue for introspection and realignment with my core values. It’s a moment to ask myself: Am I living in harmony with what I truly value and believe in? This reflection often reveals if I’m straying from my path or if there’s a need to recalibrate my approach to life and work.
In these moments, pausing becomes essential. I turn to mindfulness practices, immerse myself in the tranquility of nature, or engage in activities that help me reset mentally and emotionally. These practices aren’t just a temporary escape; they’re a way to regain clarity and perspective.
My journey, like many others, has seen its fair share of overwhelming moments – navigating through a divorce, embracing the role of a single mother, and transitioning into a new career. Each instance of overwhelm signaled a need for change. It was an indication that my current approach wasn’t serving me well and that it was time to explore new paths or strategies.
My advice to anyone experiencing overwhelm is to see it not as a setback, but as a signpost. It’s an opportunity to pause, reflect, and pivot if necessary. By aligning your actions with your values and allowing yourself the space to breathe and reset, you can navigate through these periods with greater ease and clarity.
Contact Info:
- Website: www.kathleenkillen.com
- Instagram: @coupleswithkathleen
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kathleenkillen/
Image Credits
LoveBee Photography
