We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Dylesia Hampton Barner LCSW. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Dylesia Hampton Barner below.
Dylesia, we are so appreciative of you taking the time to open up about the extremely important, albeit personal, topic of mental health. Can you talk to us about your journey and how you were able to overcome the challenges related to mental issues? For readers, please note this is not medical advice, we are not doctors, you should always consult professionals for advice and that this is merely one person sharing their story and experience.
I was diagnosed with Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) in 2020 after over 30 years of interpersonal trauma stemming from a mentally, emotionally, and spiritually abusive relationship with my mother. As a high achieving African-American woman, it had been difficult to find a mental health provider who would see my day-to-day struggles with anxiety, intrusive thoughts, mistrust, and social isolation as more than than just challenges I’d figure my way out of.
At the time I was diagnosed, I’d been in therapy for six years, was on my seventh clinician, and all the therapy sessions I’d attended up until then mostly consisted of the therapist gawking over my resilience and accomplishments, and telling me everything else would work itself out because I was Dylesia. And even more disheartingly, when it came to the topic of the severe manipulation, gaslighting, othering, and verbal abuse I’d endured at the hands of my mom, therapists had been hands off, using statements like “But that’s your mom” and “You only get one mom” which shamed me into silence.
The clinician who diagnosed me was different. She saw through my accolades and into the eyes of my confused and hurt inner child. The diagnosis freed me. Finally, I felt seen. And shortly after, I began to share my truth publicly and build community and expertise around helping other women heal from mother-daughter trauma. Being vulnerable and creating visibility for myself so that other women would feel safe to be vulnerable helped me overcome.
Appreciate the insights and wisdom. Before we dig deeper and ask you about the skills that matter and more, maybe you can tell our readers about yourself?
As seen in O, the Oprah Magazine and on media platforms such as PopSugar and CBS TV, I am a Licensed Therapist who specializes in helping women with absent, abusive, and neglectful moms figure out healing, life, and womanhood, including how to break the generational curse of mother-daughter trauma with their daughters. I am the Founder, CEO, and Director of Mental, Emotional, & Spiritual Care at Radical Change Therapy, a multi-state virtual mental health practice servicing clients located in DC, VA, MD, TN, and CO. I also have a namesake YouTube channel where I share therapeutic strategies for women seeking to recover from mother-daughter trauma.
If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?
The three most impactful qualities on my journey to healing from mother-daughter trauma have been truth, spirituality, and courage. During my initial phases of healing, I put pen to paper and reflected as much as I could about the experiences I’d had with my mom. I wrote down every traumatic encounter I could remember so I could process the in’s and out’s fully and take my questions and qualms to God. Next, I’d write prayers and tape them all over the walls of my closet. They served as affirmations of His promises and reminders of what He thought about me, which slowly replaced the vile opinions and labels of my mother. Finally, I answered His call to take a risk and see if I was alone in my suffering. I started with a few Instagram posts here and there, graduated to creating an 8-part live video series, and four years later, I’m the industry expert on mother-daughter trauma recovery and have pivoted my career as a licensed therapist into regularly sharing evidence-based strategies with my audience of over 10K women.
Okay, so before we go we always love to ask if you are looking for folks to partner or collaborate with?
I’d love to partner with fashion and beauty brands who are interested in leveraging their platforms to raise mother-daughter trauma awareness. As of 2022, research showed that over 3 billion women desire a better relationship with their mom and suffer from ridicule, social poverty, failure to thrive, self-punishment, and intergenerational threats as a result of their unresolved pain. With women not only collectively spending billions of dollars on clothing, shoes, accessories, hair, makeup, skincare, and the likes per year but valuing brands who care about their overall wellbeing, it is highly probable that a partnership with me will boost sales and generate significant interest and attention.
Contact Info:
- Website: www.imdtri.org
- Instagram: @dylesiahbarner
- Youtube: youtube.com/@dylesiahbarner
Image Credits
2024 Samantha Behrens Photo 2021 Camille Brown Mills
