We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Krystyna Walters. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Krystyna below.
Hi Krystyna, we’re so appreciative of you taking the time to share your nuggets of wisdom with our community. One of the topics we think is most important for folks looking to level up their lives is building up their self-confidence and self-esteem. Can you share how you developed your confidence?
A wise woman once told me self-esteem comes from esteemable acts. That resonated. For me, it wasn’t about talking positively to myself or affirming myself, although I read and applied Julia Cameron’s “The Artist’s Way” and did some positive affirming as well.
Self-esteem for me was built through good deeds. Volunteering at the soup kitchen. At church. At school events. At events even in my 20s when I had to purposely seek out places to volunteer and serve. Self-esteem was the deed of showing up with a positive outlook and a smile on my face, and consciously choosing not to condemn, criticize or complain.
Self-esteem was built through choosing to be a good friend – the kind of friend that is HEALTHY – spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically. (Although, yes, I could eat better. And yes, I still PMS). But for my teens and early 20s…. I wasn’t healthy. In fact, I was a bit toxic. And guess what? That’s not self-esteem building. It’s the opposite. At the age of 25 I didn’t know who I was when I looked in the mirror. I saw a broken fragile liar living a double life. I desperately needed self-esteem.
So when my wise angel told me “Self esteem comes from esteemable acts,” I got to work. I took ACTION to do esteem-able things. I showed up on time, grounded, present, and focus. I developed healthy habits. I did the things. The “work” for me sometimes was waking up and doing the dishes in the sink and making my bed. And that was enough. It was enough to build self-esteem as someone reliable who suits up and shows up for her life.
And guess what… fast forward and I have a 6 figure tutoring company, a life of dreamy jobs like acting, producing, singing… the husband and children I always dreamed of.
And that took some serious self-esteem building.
And for me…. confidence is linked, though not perfectly. I feel confident in my art and my abilities and skills when I have training and preparation. Which is to say I don’t always feel confident. I’m human! I have times I doubt myself, or times I don’t show up as prepared as I wish I had… and in those moments my confidence wavers.
Though nowadays, if my confidence wavers, it’s the confidence whether or not I nailed an audition or if I could have performed better. The confidence that I’m a good human being is (nearly) unshakeable. But hey, even that sometimes… I find ways I could do better.
We’re all learning and growing….
Thanks for sharing that. So, before we get any further into our conversation, can you tell our readers a bit about yourself and what you’re working on?
I own and run Avery Prep Tutoring, serving middle and high schoolers. We help them achieve their academic goals and open doors for higher education or prestigious private schools. The most rewarding aspect is witnessing the growth of students as they build skills and confidence.
Growing the business and tutoring are rewarding activities, and Avery Prep Tutoring makes it possible for me to live a creative life full of the dreams of my childhood: acting, singing, performing, songwriting, and producing film and Tv.
Thanks to technology, my tutoring company serves families across the country (and sometimes abroad!). I’d love to help you or any students who may want to open doors to their future.
As an actress, I love theater, musical theater, and TV and Film. This summer you will catch me playing a mom who can’t handle life and decides to live as a Goat instead. Details of Greatest of All Tina (GOAT)’s release aren’t allowed to be made public just yet.
As a film producer, I love being able to tell stories without having to wait for someone else to say yes or cast me. Producing has opened so many doors plus showered me in memories and skill-building that are all ridiculously fun and challenging in a great way.
Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
TENACITY. Don’t give up. Everyone else gives up… be the person standing there at the end.
“If a human being can do it, I can do it.”
This quote continues to empower me. My acting coach Aaron Speiser said it to me, though I don’t know if he was quoting it from someone else. But it’s this idea of not giving myself a ceiling. Of believing I can do anything.
THE ONE THING – it’s a book. But I find its system to be incredible for achieving extraordinary success in all areas of my life.
Laura Doyle’s “The Surrendered Wife” and “The Surrendered Single.” – They taught me to be a loving fun human who doesn’t have to control everyone and everything (especially my husband). These have been vital skills to a happy life for me.
If you’re early in your journey, read 60 books a year. Learn Learn Learn, be kind to yourself, and don’t give up.
To close, maybe we can chat about your parents and what they did that was particularly impactful for you?
My parents made me work for minimum wage for purchases like clothing or manicures, but gave me unlimited access to books or skill-building lessons like violin, piano, gymnastics, swimming, etc.
Not to say we should all give our children unlimited access to lessons (I believe in doing what is right for a family’s finances and vision), but I did learn a lot from having to work for what I wanted.
He also treated our allowance like a bank account, complete with interest to encourage savings.
He taught us about the stock market and helped me open a Roth IRA when I turned 15 and got my first job at Dairy Queen.
Contact Info:
- Website: imdb.me/krystynawalters
- Instagram:instagram.com/actresskrystyna
- Yelp: https://www.yelp.com/biz/avery-prep-tutoring-los-angeles-2
Image Credits
Theo and Juliet (headshot) Katie Rose Photography (professional of me with the girls)
