We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Octavia Yearwood. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Octavia below.
Octavia , so great to have you with us and we want to jump right into a really important question. In recent years, it’s become so clear that we’re living through a time where so many folks are lacking self-confidence and self-esteem. So, we’d love to hear about your journey and how you developed your self-confidence and self-esteem.
I believe that anything you do has to be a practice for you, being a practitioner of what you do mixed with a little delulu that says “Im the best”or “this is what i deserve” are major keys to FEELING like you can do anything. That “I can do anything!” Triggers the exploratory and curious childlike energy in you that has the freedom that every adult wants, and because feelings are energy it has power. That power/energy allows you and pushes you to materialize in the real world. Everytime you bring things to life through your practice it levels up your self-efficacy and self-determination which then levels up your confidence and self-esteem. If I was to put it more simply, I’d say, the more you allow yourself to prove to yourself you can do whatever it is your heart desires the more you grow your confidence and self-esteem. It doesn’t even have to be in “work” you can practice discernment, you can practice speaking up for yourself, you can practice self-care, you can practice your boundaries. Whatever it is that matters most to you has to be a practice.
Great, so let’s take a few minutes and cover your story. What should folks know about you and what you do?
I am someone who leans into the curiosity that we all came into the world with. I would say my brand is one that inspires people to lean into and explore the many ways you want to show up in the world. My brand says you weren’t meant to be or do just one thing in this life. Everything starts with self, so for me, I constantly think about healing and support and how I can fill the gaps in things to make it better. I learned this primary by being an educator. I’ve been an educator for over 20 years. When I first started creating programming it was for the youth. I wanted to create programs that taught young people what I wise I learned in school like team work. Competition is often taught but how to care for a team you work with, or how to be a caring leader is not. When I started doing programming at Soho house I thought about how I could make the space more inclusive of black people, because when I spoke to my people they did not feel like programming or the environment reflected that. I spent my first year in their committee establishing a relationship in the space before helping people become members and creating programming that would create a sense of belonging. Now there are more black people on committees and leading programming as members. When I observed and learned about how many black trans women were being killed I wrote for a grant and produced a docuseries that both share their story and educated viewers elements they may not understand. My delulu said I could make a change or save at least one life by sharing stories that humanize a people that are PEOPLE after all. I did the PR for the project and got it picked up by AppleTV, it was my first ever film.
I grew up in foster care and a lot of my life I did not feel loved and cared for so when I say “everything starts with self” I mean never forget what you needed, we are all connected. When you heal yourself, reflect on the world, and truly think about how you want to show up in it you can do better for it and to it. This discovery started when I wrote my first book “how the hell did you do that?!” I wrote the book because I wanted to give a playbook to children who also didn’t feel loved and cared for but still wanted to do something with their life. It’s a memoir because people will always learn from stories, a guidebook because children, and the child in all of us will always need guidance, and it’s a workbook because writing your thoughts and desires down is power. I self published because I knew what I wanted to do and didn’t want to be held up possibly by waiting on a “yes”, instead I said yes to myself. I ended up being named Best Author in Miami by the Miami New Times, something I didn’t even know existed, lol.
I am excited about the Art in Public places commission myself and friend Amani Lewis is doing called “say cheese!” That will be at the grove central station in coconut grove. It’s work that is meant to inspire smiles and will feature folks from community who are dope people. It’s a complete full circle moment for me because when I moved to Miami 13 years ago I used my last $150 on gas yo get there and for several months I slept in my car in coconut grove while working at Einstein Bagels and at an after school program teaching dance. I would’ve never thought that 12 years later I’d be back with a 350,000 commission doing visual art!
Up until this point my brand has been built on helping others, now I am stepping, yet again, into a new field that will give me more time with myself. One side effect of constantly doing work that centers others is loosing yourself. What do I WANT FOR MYSELF?! So the last 6 months I’ve been in the Inspector Flow school created by a woman in Ohio named Nita Davidson (affectionately known as “Cousin Nita”) that focuses teaching people of color how to be a home inspector. I am now INTERNACHI certified and will be blazing up the field. I’m super excited about it. I will still do what I’ve always done but this will be another way for me to help people but also focus on my goals and shift my life and remember that I’m not only here as a tool to shift the life of others but also my own. I’m also excited about the next music project that’s dropping this year, it’s an affirmation album called “The Cheat Code” – spoiler alert, it’s you!
Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
1. Discernment. A year ago this would not have been something I said, because I didn’t really understand its importance, but at this point it’s number one. An attachment to this would be boundaries that you stand on. Being able to discern who’s for you and who is not is critical because the backlash of not having it can be detrimental to your goals. Whose energy fits you? Have you allowed space for folks to prove/show you who they are before “getting in bed with them”? Know who to have close, who not to have at all, and who to keep at a safe distance.
2. Have a plan but be flexible. I used to be rigid and had to have things exactly how I thought I wanted it, but that doesn’t leave space for creativity to do what it does. For example, when I was a choreographer, for a long time I didn’t leave space for dancers to freestyle or bring their natural element to the work. I focused on who could do what I wanted. Then, while working on a new piece that would depict a relationship in reverse, the piece would start with the breakup and end on the high vibes of when it first started. I left room for the dancers to express how these moments felt for them and it turned out to be one of my best pieces. Flexibility allows you to fill your blind spots by trusting and allowing feedback from the people you work with. All of my work from that point on left room for that, which I think is a major component of my success over the years.
3. Question everything. Questions lead to more questions and more questions lead to more answers. Ask yourself questions about who you are, who you want to be, what you learned, what you want to learn, what do you want your purpose to do, how can you do what you want to do, who can you do it with, and why are you doing what your doing are some you can start with. When you constantly question you feed and practice your curiosity.
Awesome, really appreciate you opening up with us today and before we close maybe you can share a book recommendation with us. Has there been a book that’s been impactful in your growth and development?
Although you should go to OctaviaYearwood.com and get my book because it’s life changing, for me the book “Not nice” was a game changer for me. The book was suggested by someone I dated at the time because she clocked my “nice” ways and how it was hindering me. The book talks about how being nice is essentially a trauma response. It taught me that my being nice was people pleasing. When you people please you aren’t being honest with yourself, you aren’t speaking up for yourself, and asking for what you truly want. I’d say I’m still learning but I’m also still practicing. When you are working in a space where you are focused on others it’s easy to be this way, but you often end up on the bottom of the shoe of the people you supported and feeling shitty and used. We don’t want that for ourselves! This book was really bold, and allowed me to reflect on myself and how I was doing the work I loved and how to make it a better experience for myself. I said earlier “everything comes back to self” this includes you caring and honoring yourself in everything you do. Self sacrifice can mean time dedicated, giving up comforts for a limited time, but doesn’t mean martyr.
Contact Info:
- Website: www.OctaviaYearwood.com
- Instagram: @Octavia_Yearwood
- Youtube: @cookingftculture
- Other: Go checkout my latest music project, Life’s Interludes! https://open.spotify.com/album/3BJnTS8RRwcgoVb39hus1w
Image Credits
Mood swings studio, Shalaia Green, Angela Hill, Elijah Negasi, Amy Yearwood, AJ Woomer
