Meet Sara Nasserzadeh

We recently connected with Sara Nasserzadeh and have shared our conversation below.

Sara , thank you so much for joining us. You are such a positive person and it’s something we really admire and so we wanted to start by asking you where you think your optimism comes from?

I embrace constructive and motivating optimism, grounded in reality rather than false hope or illusions. This belief is rooted in several influences:

Firstly, my spiritual and existential perspective has taught me that life is a precious gift, urging me to live it to its fullest potential.

Secondly, my life experiences have cultivated a profound resilience within me. Growing up amidst paradoxes in a war zone and oppressive political systems, living in various countries and working with various groups has shaped my outlook, revealing unexpected truths about humanity in general and societies that I have been a part of.

Thirdly, my mother’s unwavering optimism has instilled in me a profound appreciation for finding beauty in every person and situation. Her favorite think to say was: “first see something beautiful in someone/something and then engage with them”.

Lastly, my extensive work with individuals, groups and companies from over 41 countries has enriched me with diverse perspectives and invaluable wisdom. This global interaction has deepened my trust in people’s commonalities, emotions, hopes, and fears, enabling me to connect authentically with others beyond surface appearances. I have come to learn that there is always a way forward despite seemingly insurmountable issues.

Great, so let’s take a few minutes and cover your story. What should folks know about you and what you do?

My mission is to foster world peace through building meaningful relationships one at a time from bedroom to the boardrooms and my new book Love by Design: 6 ingredients to build a lifetime of love, focuses on introducing a new model of love that will save people from heartbreak and disillusionment and guides them step by step to cultivate loving relationships that will give their heart a break!

As a social psychologist, clinician, author, and researcher, my aim is to bring innovation and scientific approach to sexuality, relationships, and intercultural fluency. From an outsiders perspective, my background and journey of life might not have been the smoothest, however, I am grateful for every minute of it because it created a fire within me that fuels everything I do in life. It is truly a privilege to do what I do. There is not a moment or even a single aspect that I take for granted in my life or work.

People like to receive relevant and timely information from the person that is informed and available, so I love to meet people where they are therefore, my contributions to our human community take various forms. I have written books, pioneered various research projects, sat on the Boards of various organizations, companies and mentored our next generation of leaders and clinicians, trained other providers, keynoted various events and conferences, contributed to the press and media outlets across the world, started my own social media channels and newsletter to send out uncensured information to my community and have created and hosted an award-winning radio and TV programs for the BBC World Service, notably the first in the Middle East addressing sexual well-being. I have also collaborated extensively with United Nations agencies to inure the global impact of my work. I am based in Los Angeles, California and I travel extensively. I actively engage with my global community through social media platforms like LinkedIn, Instagram, and Facebook, and I recently launched the Common Ground newsletter, providing evidence-informed tips and tools to empower individuals in advancing from relational literacy to fluency. All of these I do with pleasure and humility and I hope anyone who reads these words can cultivate insights about what they can offer to the world and just do it. Many people think they are not good enough, connected enough, educated enough, etc. etc. etc. as a human, whoever you are, you must posses something that someone else can benefit from just start offering it and you will reach whomever that needs it at that moment in time.

My third book in English, ‘Love by Design: 6 Ingredients to Build a Lifetime of Love,’ offers a novel model of love “Emergent Love model” and distills two decades of research on thriving relationships into essential elements: attraction, respect, trust, shared vision, compassion, and loving behaviors. This is my gift to you all out there and to the generations to come. I wish I had this book when I was looking to cultivate my loving relationship and I hope anyone who wants to be in any thriving relationship (romantic and otherwise) considered reading my book so they know where to put their efforts that actually make a difference.

Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?

1- start with curiosity but develop genuine interest for people, topics and the world around you.
2- be realistically optimistic
3- be kind
4- operate from a place of compassion (be there for the other) not empathy (be there with the other)
5- assume the best in people
6- stay true to your values

How can folks who want to work with you connect?

Together, let’s revolutionize our discourse on love and dispel the notion that meaningful relationships are exclusive to a fortunate few. This isn’t just a concept—it’s a meticulously researched paradigm shift in love that can positively impact our world one relationship at a time.

As Einstein noted, ‘We cannot solve a problem with the same thinking that created it.’ Our approach to love hasn’t kept pace with advancements in other areas of life like fitness, nutrition, and self-care. It’s time to move beyond relying on luck and embrace evidence-based strategies for cultivating fulfilling relationships. Let’s adopt a fresh perspective on love and thriving relationships—one that heals hearts instead of breaking them.

If you are tired of the disillusionment that we have around love, I urge you to join me in spreading this message. Consider sharing Love by Design and Emergent love model with your partner (s), circle of friends and networks; your students, your children, your friends who are engaged, getting married, have been together for a long time, organize discussions or book clubs around it. This is how we can create new ways we experience and express love. we need a new outlook, new terminology, new belief that everyone deserves to be in a loving relationship that they desire and deserve. Just take the first step. I will come to speak at your events, offer you further resources (you can access some for free on my newsletter and my website) and support you in however way I can.

Contact Info:

Image Credits

– Courtesy of Fergal Spelman

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