Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Maria Merloni. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.
Maria, so good to have you with us today. We’ve always been impressed with folks who have a very clear sense of purpose and so maybe we can jump right in and talk about how you found your purpose?
For as long as I can remember, I’ve been a very sexual person. I remember being very young in my bed at night and masturbating to orgasm. I’m pretty sure my older sister, on the opposite side of the room, had no idea and was immediately sleeping once the lights were turned out.
That’s why, at age 37 and having no idea how I was going to pay for life coaching school, when an acquaintance suggested I moonlight as an exotic dancer, I did not hesitate.
I knew, of course, that becoming a stripper was not something the average woman- let alone the average thirty-seven year old woman- would do. However, having come from a household in which nudity was non-sexual and common, I didn’t have many qualms about being naked in front of others. I knew all the typical stereotypes about strippers: they’re uneducated, drug addicts, prostitutes, promiscuous, etc. I was none of those things. However, I was a single, newly divorced mother that was making the salary of a social worker and had no child support, and I desperately wanted to change my life by becoming a life coach as well as a therapist, which I already was. And frankly, even at that age I didn’t much care what others thought of me. So, I went for it.
I did not know it at the time, but that choice would lead me to know that my true focus and purpose on the planet had something to do with sexuality. You see, I wasn’t just a stripper there to make money. I was to discover that what I was really doing at the strip clubs was sacred work…and in some ways, part of my life purpose work…. I helped my customers accept their sexuality more, to stop shaming themselves for being so attracted to women that they would actually pay money to sit at “pervert row” at the stage and tip dancers. I also inadvertently helped men who would otherwise never have stepped foot near a therapist process what was coming up for them. I gave these men “happiness therapy” (as one of my customers called it) over everything from grief over loss of a spouse or mother, to spousal life threatening illness, to marital strife. A couple of them even cried in a strip club. I could feel my customers actually shifting, growing, evolving through these experiences.
Over time, I began to learn more about sacred sexuality on my own, and had the urge to start practicing sacred spot massage. I knew intuitively that in a sense I already knew how to do it. I’ll say more about what sacred spot massage is later. I practiced on friends. And I found yes I DID already know how to do it.
Simultaneously, I was presenting outwardly to the world as a therapist and life coach specializing in sex and relationships. I still am. And I was thinking THAT was my career. And it has been. I don’t see myself stopping that, not in the near future anyway. Yet, the whole time I had an inner knowing that there was much more I was meant to be doing. And this is it.
I have a number of psychic friends and through channeling I learned I knew how to practice tantra because of multiple past lifetimes in which that was my life’s work. Sacred spot massage is a spiritual practice in which someone is able to release stuck energy in their body through internal and external genital massage. Thousands of years ago, it was an accepted and common practice in certain places in the world. I know it still is now, in Thailand, for example. In general, however, most people don’t even know what sacred spot massage IS and many of those that do think it is a sexual practice. The reason for this is because our culture, unfortunately, does not lift up and celebrate sexuality….does not recognize the health benefits of healthy sexuality and orgasm. Not only has sexuality not been lifted up, in fact, it has been demonized as something that is wrong or bad, capable of sending someone to hell as it were, for those who believe in such concepts. For the most part sacred spot massage has been lost to the world, thus the name: The Lost Art.
Thanks, so before we move on maybe you can share a bit more about yourself?
The process of honing my skills, reconnecting with my past lifetime selves, and remembering things that aren’t even taught in modern tantra schools- happened over a period of almost twenty years now. At one point a friend of mine said to me one day: “I think I’m supposed to go to Egypt and I think you’re supposed to come with me.” We went together and explored many of the ancient temples there, among which was the Temple of Isis, the Goddess of love. There, we both sat outside the temple with tears of remembrance, joy, and grief rolling down our cheeks, unable to articulate the internal experience we were both having. Egypt, of course, was one of the places that sacred spot massage was commonly practiced, thousands of years ago.
In the meantime, I have taught many workshops to participants who want to learn sacred spot massage. I have witnessed people heal grief from past lives, trauma from sexual abuse and other types of trauma, overcome sexual dysfunction, depression, chronic fatigue, and even a woman who had never ejaculated during orgasm, spontaneously do it. ( Her husband later told me that since then, when she comes he has to block her ejaculate so it won’t hit the ceiling.) Yes, female ejaculation too is part of our birthright as women, another lost art, so to speak.
I have had episodes of what I call “bleed through” from many past lives in which I was killed, punished, jailed, mocked, laughed at, etc. I have experienced much dread, avoidance, and all forms of resistance in order to ostensibly avoid recreating any of the past life traumas I get hints of in my waking and sleeping life now.. As with many other forms of life changing modalities, tantra and sacred spot massage have become tied to the occult, to sex, to immorality, and even deemed illegal in parts of the world and in certain times in history.
For all of these reasons I have resisted knowing that bringing this lost art back to the world is my sacred purpose. This year, I finally faced the fact that it is now or never. And I choose now.
My next venture will be to co-facilliate some teaching with a friend who has gone further with a solo practice of sacred spot massage than anyone I have ever known. He has a deep desire to get this practice out into the world, so that others can share in joy and sacredness he experiences in his own sacred practice.
Additionally, I am in the process of producing a video series for women about both solo and partnered sacred spot massage. My desire is to get these sacred practices to become common knowledge in the world again, so that all can benefit from them.
Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
I would say the top three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that have helped me on my journey were: experience, persistence, and courage. Most of what I have learned about being a tantric practitioner, therapist, and coach came from experience. It is one thing to know the theories and practices that are out there in the world. It is quite another to develop one’s skills through practice.
To get to the skill level I am at now took me a long time, and I didn’t give up. Sure, there were times when I doubted my skills and progress. To be honest, there still are, and this is normal. However, the most important piece of self development is to just keep going, no matter what.
It takes courage to continue to move forward with developing the skills of one’s life purpose and to continue to put oneself out there in the world. Alongside, developing and maintaining a conscious, loving relationship, there’s nothing scarier to most people. It’s easy to let things go, give up, and cop out. It’s a lot harder to take the scary steps and go for it. I recommend having lots of personal as well as professional support if you’re moved to do something big and worthwhile in the world.
Who is your ideal client or what sort of characteristics would make someone an ideal client for you?
My ideal client is anyone that has either a yoni (sacred space) or lingam (wand of light) and has a desire to improve their connection to self, heal trauma, have more energy, more self love, and/or have more sexual flow and less sexual dysfunction. It would be someone who is open-minded and who is open to possibilities and magic, or at the very least what seems like magic. And lastly, my ideal client would be someone who is committed to their own self improvement and increasing their self love.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.mariamerloni.com
- Instagram: maria_merloni
- Facebook: Maria Merloni, The Turned on Woman
- Linkedin: https://linkedin.com/in/maria-merloni-1b22477a
so if you or someone you know deserves recognition please let us know here.
