We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Emily Bartscher a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.
Emily, so good to have you with us today. We’ve always been impressed with folks who have a very clear sense of purpose and so maybe we can jump right in and talk about how you found your purpose?
I grew up with my best friend, Megan, who used a wheelchair and had multiple disabilities. Megan was non-speaking and relied on adults for all her daily life and self-care needs. Despite her challenges, Megan and I formed a deep bond. She taught me patience, commitment, and love. I loved caring for her and providing opportunities to enhance her quality of life. We were friends from age three until her unexpected passing at 23.
When Megan passed away, I was working as a nanny for a boy with disabilities. His mother expressed a desire to attend a movie but had no one to watch her son. My deep passion for helping those with disabilities, inspired by my years caring for Megan, led me to launch “care nights” in 2013. These nights allowed children with disabilities to come to my house for fun while their parents enjoyed a much-needed break. Over the years, I moved from a handicap-accessible townhome to a ranch home.
In 2015, I met Phoenyx, a four-year-old girl living in a children’s hospital who was up for adoption. I decided to adopt her as a single mother, knowing that the skills and tools Megan had given me would enable me to provide the care Phoenyx deserved. Phoenyx resembles Megan in many ways, and I truly believe Megan placed her in my life to continue my purpose of caring for those with disabilities.
As I raise Phoenyx, now 13, we continue to provide respite care for various children with disabilities. I converted my basement into a sensory gym, always striving to create a safe, fun, and engaging environment where children can be themselves. We have grown in many ways, and none of this would be possible without the impact Megan left on me.
Let’s take a small detour – maybe you can share a bit about yourself before we dive back into some of the other questions we had for you?
My full-time job is as an early childhood special education teacher for children with disabilities ages 3-5. I began teaching in 2012 and launched my side business, Especially 4 You, in 2013. Especially 4 You Child Care offers private respite services, providing in-home evening care in my handicap-accessible ranch home. My services are available 1-2 times each month and are specifically intended for children with disabilities. During the summer months, I accommodate more children during the week who may struggle to find appropriate care.
The goal of my services is to provide top-quality care for children with special needs, allowing parents to enjoy a care-free, relaxing night to spend time with one another. During the care services, children participate in child-centered, socially-promoting activities and are provided with an appropriate dinner, ensuring their best interests are considered in all areas. My hope is for parents to enjoy a date night or a night alone, knowing that every aspect of their child’s needs is being met. Everyone deserves a night off!
What sets my services apart is the direct, personalized care provided to children with disabilities. I am dedicated to creating a welcoming home where children of all abilities can come and enjoy time with their friends.
Drawing from my full-time job experience, my past with Megan, and raising my daughter, Phoenyx, I have a broad range of experience working with individuals with disabilities. I have close friends who assist on care nights, and we also recruit high school students interested in working with those with disabilities, as well as college graduate students. Our volunteers help run our program, and we are always looking for new people to join us on care nights.
My goal is to ensure each child’s interests are considered, creating an environment where every child feels welcomed and has fun!
During the warm, sunny months, my backyard transforms into a play space filled with multiple swings, a slide, and a trampoline. We have a water table, sand table, bubble machine, and even a disco light! In 2022, I remodeled the basement to create an indoor backyard. The basement now features two swings, a ninja course, a trampoline, a punching bag, and a sensory-friendly busy board. I continuously add new elements to ensure everyone has a positive experience in my home.
Accessibility is a priority for me. I utilize switches and technology to enable each child, regardless of their disability, to participate in fun activities. Every child’s needs and interests are taken into consideration when designing this space.
One of the most exciting aspects of care night is meeting new families who are seeking a break. I love providing a safe and engaging environment where children of all needs and abilities feel welcomed and loved. Additionally, I enjoy educating high school and college students, offering them opportunities to learn how to communicate and interact with children of varying abilities. Every child deserves to be seen and heard, and we strive to provide that during our care nights.
Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
Commitment, Patience, and Love.
I became a caregiver at a young age and was dedicated to providing Megan with a life full of experiences. I loved learning how to reposition her, manage her tube feedings, administer her medications, and assist her through a major seizure. I quickly adapted to communicating with someone who was non-speaking, relying on her facial expressions and gestures to hold conversations. These skills have carried over to my work with each child I encounter.
I am passionate about enabling children to express themselves. I know basic American Sign Language and Braille, and I have experience with various communication devices and boards. I am committed to creating an accessible environment for those with wheelchairs and limited mobility. I love discovering each child’s interests and building on them so they can experience true joy.
Embracing unconditional love and striving for excellence in everything I do has influenced both my full-time career and my side business. Working with children who have a variety of disabilities has taught me how to care for their diverse needs. Every child deserves love, and it’s important to look beyond their disabilities to embrace them for who they truly are. I pour my heart into each child I work with, making sure they feel seen and heard.
Working with Megan over the years has truly tested and deepened my patience. Many of the children I work with are unable to answer my everyday questions, respond about their well-being, or share comments about their daily lives. This can be frustrating at times, but I recognize that their frustration often surpasses my own. It takes a great deal of patience to support those who rely on you for all their daily life skills. Many of the children I work with have auditory processing delays, making wait time crucial. By being patient and allowing them enough time to process my questions, they can respond in their preferred communication style. Behavior is a form of communication, and taking the time to learn each child’s signals and cues significantly enhances my ability to support them.
My advice is to always remain open-minded. Stay informed and learn from individuals with disabilities. Take the time to get to know them. It can be intimidating at first, but if you invest the time to understand their specific cues and signals, you’ll realize they are just like you—they have likes and dislikes, and they seek connection, belonging, and love.
Before we go, any advice you can share with people who are feeling overwhelmed?
When I feel overwhelmed, I reach out to caregivers for support so I can take a break, as I am a single parent to a child with disabilities. People often ask how I find time for myself. I make an effort to schedule breaks where I am not responsible for my daughter’s care, allowing me to relax and recharge. I prioritize tasks by importance and focus on controlling what I can, such as my responses, feelings, choices, and the boundaries I set.
I’ve learned to prioritize time for myself, though it has been a difficult lesson over the years. If I’m not recharged, I can’t support others effectively. Taking deep breaths and making lists of tasks help me feel more in control. I constantly remind myself that some things can wait and that everything will get done eventually.
I regularly visit a therapist, receive monthly massages, and attend chiropractic sessions. I work with a personal fitness trainer twice a week to strengthen my body, and I make sure to take time for activities that bring me joy—like lying in bed, eating Chinese food, and taking a bath.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://especially4you.wixsite.com/especially-4-you-chi
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Especially4YouChildCare
Image Credits
Noel Sunne for the individual pic of myself and professional one of me and Phoenyx
Emily Bartscher for the other photos
so if you or someone you know deserves recognition please let us know here.
