We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Kim Willoughby a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.
Kim, we’ve been so fortunate to work with so many incredible folks and one common thread we have seen is that those who have built amazing lives for themselves are also often the folks who are most generous. Where do you think your generosity comes from?
I always wonder if editors roll their eyes when interviewees refer back to their childhood as a reason for a certain trait that they inhabit so if that is the case, editors, prepare to have your eyes stuck to the back of your head because my childhood is something that I absolutely reflect on all of the time. As a kid, I didn’t have traditional parents or parental figures in my life. My mom was always working and opening businesses and the passion and drive that she had to scale the business came at the cost of us having to really grow up by ourselves. In the beginning when she just owned her jewelry shop, I would come to the store with her and watch her talk to customers, study her body language and sales tactics, and even step in and help her with customers. Mind you, I was tiny enough to fit in small closets under the jewelry cases and take naps and build forts, so business and sales was my entire life since I was as little as I could remember.
Slowly, as I grew older (like 2nd or 3rd grade), I couldn’t sleep in the little closets anymore, and my mom pursued different passions in opening Pho restaurants and sandwich shops around Las Vegas. During those times, too, I would follow her and sit at the cash register and ring up people’s orders. During rush hour, I would be folding silverware into napkins. I was always super involved in the businesses she ran. And one of the things I always saw from being around her all of the time was the way that she would never turn down a person in need. My mom would find people on the street and ask them if they wanted a job at her restaurant and wash dishes for her. If she needed odd jobs done at our home, she would find hardworking people in bad situations and invite them to use their skills to help her in any way possible. I remember often seeing people who would just sit and cry to her about what they were going through, the way they would have to feed their kids but they had no money, and just beg her for a job and she would give it to them without hesitation. She would pick them up from wherever they were living, drive them to work for her, pay them, and at the end of the day she would drop them off after everything closed.
It makes me emotional thinking about this because I never understood why everyone has such a discourse with me in offering to use my photography and videography skills for free for other people and not worrying about money or some type of transactional commodity. And thinking about my mom, though I was not close to her growing up, her heart is intertwined with mine.
When I turned 10 and was confident enough to watch myself at home and could walk to school and back home without any missed steps, I stopped seeing my mom. I would call this part of my story, the hard part, because I really missed having my mom. In becoming so independent at such a young age, I struggled to ask for help and just tried to figure things out on my own. Asking for things just seemed to feel like being a burden on everyone because it was kind of a “I’m not your mom” type of situation where the basic things I was needing, I couldn’t get it from her because she just was not there. I found myself waiting on playgrounds for her to pick me up but she never would, having so many questions about basic hygiene or dressing myself that I couldn’t ask her about, coming home to absolute nothingness and darkness and an eerie quietness, and developing extreme abandonment issues that hindered my trust in people for a long time. BUT. I recognize all of the people who became overly generous to me during this “hard part” of my life. The days that I didn’t get picked up from school, a teacher or a friend’s mom would offer my rides home. The days where I didnt dress myself properly for the weather because I just didn’t know how, a friend’s mom would buy me winter coats to hep me stay warm. The times where I wanted a home that was bright and full of love and a mother figure there to interact with, a friend would always welcome me into theirs, and treat me as their own. It was by these people that I really felt joy even in darkness.
I cannot wrap this up without mentioning my husband Moses, who helped me in my adulthood more than anyone ever had. To measure generosity is not something I do, but if I did, I would say he was the most generous person I had ever encountered. When I became homeless in my senior year of high school, I lived on couches, in closets, on the streets, in gyms, and in shelters. It was the darkest time of my life where I had no family, no friends, and no teachers or adult figures to lean on. When I sought help, I was turned down. When I explained my situation, my peers and counselors did not believe me, and looked away as I slowly crumbled. After saving enough money from working 2 part time jobs while also going to school, I met my husband through renting a room share in his home, and there, I experienced a kindness I had never known. Not knowing me at all with no ulterior motives, Moses would feed me when i was starving and he didnt know it, buy basic necessities for me that I had no money to buy, drive me anywhere I needed to go, answered the call if I was ever in need, paid for my rent even after I moved out of his home, and testified to me about the Love of God. In my curiosity of learning why it was he was such a generous person, I found that God was the reason behind his big heart, and that was what led me to give my life to Christ and finally be delivered from that darkness that I had always felt my entire life.
This is the story of where my generosity comes from. The innate yearning to give to others that I cannot explain, is directly a trait of being my mother’s daughter. The reason I started to become generous was because I remember the impact it had on me when others were generous to me without even knowing what I was going through at home. And most importantly, the reason I will always be generous in spite of being taken advantage of many times for my kindness, is because of my husband who led me to Christ, mu ultimate role model. I always refer back Matthew 5:38 where He says “But whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also. If anyone wants to sue you and take away your tunic, let him have your cloak also. And whoever compels you to go one mile, go with him two.” basically saying that even when others do you wrong, forgive them, and go that extra mile for them anyways.
Great, so let’s take a few minutes and cover your story. What should folks know about you and what you do?
Hi readers! My name is Kim Willoughby and I am the founder of SOTE which stands for Salt Of The Earth, a wedding photography and videography company, and the co-founder of The Way Foundation, a nonprofit organization focused on helping homeless youth, youth in need, and single parent households.
Every single day I get to wake up at 5am and run my own 6 figure earning business, answering emails and inquiries, scheduling meetings to meet with people from around the world, and photographing some of the most beautiful weddings with even more beautiful people and telling their love stories. I think the coolest part about all of it is that it is such a personal job that it doesnt even really feel like a job. I kind of feel like I am a part of history, being able to capture photographs of people that they would never have even imagined having and encapsulating memories for them for generations to come. To think that my photo might be on a mantle on a fireplace of someone’s great great grandchild one day is such a high honor. Something I would also absolutely mention as it is the foundation of my brand identity for SOTE is that we are Christian based. Everything that I do from the clients I take on, the way that I conduct myself, the policies that I have in place, are all in honor of my faith. As much pushback as I have received on this, I am unwavering, as God is the literal reason that my business has gotten as far as it has and continues to go. I can honestly say every client I’ve had was brought to me by His hand, and every success story that comes out of it is through the gift that God has given me. I am excited to continue to grow and prayerfully be featured in publications in the future.
On the hours that I am not focused on SOTE, I am the full time co-founder of The Way Foundation, and my husband Moses is the Founder. We started this foundation based on the call that we heard from God to bring us to a higher purpose. Moses had always felt led to help others and always says that it is his passion, and I have a heart for homeless kids especially since I was one, and we both had suffered the consequences of single parenthood. Combining our experiences, this is how we found our mission. Despite all of those obstacles and hardships, we still overcame and have become successful productive members of society, being great parents to our own kids, having the ability to help so many others, and owning/have owned multiple successful businesses. We are excited to continue to grow the nonprofit and urge readers to support our journey, contribute to our cause, and stay tuned for the many events we have planned for the community of Las Vegas and beyond.
There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?
Three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful for my journey to where I am now would be
1. Faith.
Faith for me has always been what has kept me grounded and motivated. During the times where I thought I would never get another client, my faith was what helped me to keep going and stay encouraged that God was going to provide for me in his perfect timing. When we quit our high paying job to pursue the nonprofit full time, it was a super scary decision that not many people would make but it was the fear of God and not doing what He was calling us to do that made us urgent in our steps. and it’s his continual provision that we are still having all of our needs met. Faith takes away that anxiousness and fear that follows all business owners. To have faith is to know that God’s got you, and you do not need to rely on ANYTHING else but Him.
2. Learning to do things on your own, all of the time, every time
Not only does this apply to the skill of photography itself like shooting manual all of the time instead of automatic, I feel like that is a given, but even down to the little things like writing your own blogs, creating your own websites, learning how to use CRM programs and drafting up proposals etc. I am sooooo glad that I didn’t take the lazy route and just outsource everything (not that there is anything wrong with that, just there is more pros than cons to doing things yourself) because now if I ever run into the problem, I am the one that knows how to fix it. And when endeavoring into a new business, I knew exactly what to do from scratch and just customized it to the specific brand of that company. I also think it is important that you learn from your own failures rather than never experiencing them at all. When I first started photography, I never second shot for anyone. To this day I still have not been a second shooter. All of my bookings have been completely on my own and as scary and reckless as that might sound, it helped me to progress tenfold because I was experiencing first hand the consequences of my mistakes. Mistakes are always going to happen but when it is associated with your face, your business, and your brand that you have built, you care a lot more and will try to improve even more to keep those things from happening. I 10000% encourage readers to not lean on others to be successful, but to bring yourself to do the hard parts, as it is completely rewarding in the end.
3. Humbling yourself
Contrary to #2, humbling yourself and remembering that you cannot do everything, is also super important in this. Constant growth and knowledge is something you should always thrive to do. Being in a place where you feel like you’re on top of the world and you know everything and need no one, will get you NO WHERE. Humbling myself and saying “okay, I need to ask someone for help” is the reason I have had so many others pour into me freely and I am more than willing to pour into others now.
Some honorable, more technical mentions for being a wedding photographer:
– Make sure that you are extremely intentional on your brand and your WHY. When things hit the fan, reflect and see if you are still doing your why.
– Vendor connections are so important. Be interactive with the community around you and you will be surprised at what comes from it.
– Do not put social media on the back burner. Show your personality on your social so people get to know who you are, but also, dont forget to always keep it professional.
Any advice for folks feeling overwhelmed?
I am a very anxious person and being overwhelmed is something I go through most days. When running a business, things can get to be a lot, and when you are passionate about it It can keep you up at night. When I am overwhelmed I usually like to talk about it with my husband to see that he offer a different perspective on the situation. Sometimes getting out of your own head is the best first step because the mind is dangerous. We think 1,000 – 3,000 words per minute, so literally, stop thinking about it. Say what you want to say to someone that you trust, talk about it, and really think about what you’re really overwhelmed about.
Other things that I do besides talking about my frustrations is to wake up early and try to do something about it. I used to let my concerns linger and I try to ignore it, but the best way to get rid of your problems is to get through them. So, wake up in the morning like wayyyyy earlier than you ever wake up, knock things out while your mind is fresh, and leave with a clear slate.
Lastly, something that I always do, is pray. Prayer changes things. I can give so many testimonies where when I prayed, God moves a mountain for me. Realizing that we are not the master of this world and there are so many things out of our control is very calming. Before you get into anything, read the verse of the day from your bible app, it doesnt have to be anything crazy, then think about it and really see how it is speaking to you. Then, have a conversation with God. Ask Him all of the things that you need that you feel are out of reach. He can do ANYTHING. Financial issues? Tell him about it and what you need from Him. Marriage problems, talk to him about your husband, and he will fix it. Need more business, tell God, and he will bring you your clients.
Contact Info:
- Website: photosbysote.com | thewayfoundation.us
- Instagram: https://instagram.com/photosbysote
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/photosbysote
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@PHOTOSBYSOTE
- Yelp: https://www.yelp.com/biz/photos-by-sote-north-las-vegas
Image Credits
Photographer for all images:
Kim Willoughby
photosbysote.com
@photosbysote
Hair stylist for bridal images with tan background
Katherine Rae
@katherineraebeauty
Glam for all images
Amanjot Kailey
@glambyammo
Studio for tan background
@hausoflightlv
Hausoflightlv.com
Dress for tan background
Perla Bridal Las Vegas
so if you or someone you know deserves recognition please let us know here.
