Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Rachel Rossi. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.
Rachel, thank you so much for joining us. You are such a positive person and it’s something we really admire and so we wanted to start by asking you where you think your optimism comes from?
As a therapist who specializes in trauma treatment, I have the privilege of meeting people during or following perhaps the most challenging and painful moments of their lives. People often wonder what it is like to hear such painful stories and to witness people’s pain in this way—particularly when it’s the pain of young kids and adolescents—and I’m often asked if it brings me down, or if it makes it hard to separate my work and home life. I’m also asked if this makes me see the world as a dangerous place, filled with suffering and pain. Maybe paradoxically, I find that in my job, I am filled with hope, in awe of the resilience and courage of my clients, and I have tremendous appreciation for the human spirit. I cannot put it better than the following quote, one of my favorites:
“Although the world is full of suffering, it is full also of the overcoming of it. My optimism, then, does not rest on the absence of evil, but on a glad belief in the preponderance of good and a willing effort always to cooperate with the good, that it may prevail.”
― Helen Keller
Appreciate the insights and wisdom. Before we dig deeper and ask you about the skills that matter and more, maybe you can tell our readers about yourself?
I am an individual and family therapist in private practice (New Vista Mental Health) in Westminster, CO, working with individuals, children, and adolescents. In my work I use EMDR, attachment theory, interpersonal neurobiology, and mindfulness, with lots of fun, humor, and art mixed in. While my offerings currently include individual, couples, and family therapy, I will soon be adding group therapy treatment options to the practice.
Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
If I were to choose three qualities that have supported my journey, it would be humor, gratitude, and humility.
As a clinician, business owner, and as a human—I think humor is incredibly helpful and supportive in coping. It is an innate human skill and need, and I give it lots of license in my work. Also, as relief theory argues, laughter and humor are helpful ways to release energy and support social bonds on a neurochemical level, so I really try to lean into laughter and humor.
Gratitude is a core value of mine, and absolutely something that has enabled me to tolerate my tough days. As obnoxious as I know this reads, I have kept a one line a day journal for the past 6 years, and in 2023 I began adding a line on gratitude each day. I find that it’s been a helpful practice for me and has helped me see things with perspective, which is supported by research on gratitude. I recently came across the notion of a ‘glimmer,’ which is basically the opposite of a trigger. It is a tiny moment that makes you feel happier, inspires awe, and prompts hope and gratitude. I’ve started actively searching for glimmers, and find that my work and home life feel sweeter.
I have learned, often the hard way, that it is always a good idea to ask for help. Small business ownership can feel daunting and lonely, particularly while navigating so many decisions solo. I’ve found it necessary to have the humility to ask for help from experts, which then enables me to feel more confident in my decisions, and better prepared to navigate the ups and downs of work. I have sought the guidance and support from parents, friends, colleagues, and also have sought clinical consultation (thank you Abby Esquivel!), business consultation (North Metro Small Business Development Center), guidance from multiple lawyers (three to be exact; for business, for ethics, and another for license protection, which may seem excessive but has been very helpful!), accounting (shout out to David(s) and Erin at Newton Street CPA,) and my dear office neighbor, Kellee Scannell.
My biggest advice to others is to have the courage to ask for help. Don’t go it alone. I have a pennant flag in my office that says ‘Nobody Knows Anything’ and I find that I need to pull it out and wave it around a bit a few times each week. I’ve known in theory that nobody knows anything until they do it, but it has taken my experiences in entrepreneurship to really understand that. We are all learning as we go, so ask for help and take comfort in knowing that many others feel like they don’t know what they’re doing, yet either!
What do you do when you feel overwhelmed? Any advice or strategies?
When I am overwhelmed I fall back on a few simple ideas: 1. When your mind is in chaos, don’t use your mind to calm your mind, use your body to calm your mind. What I mean by this, is that untangling your thoughts when you’re in a moment of overwhelm can heighten your stress—so I like to start, instead, with calming the body. Elevate the legs, slow breaths with long exhales, take some sips of ice water, place a cool pack on your chest or neck, shake out your arms and legs, take a walk around the block, relax the jaw and the tongue off the roof of the mouth, etc. Moving and soothing the body first, then take a look at the thoughts. 2. I have a tendency to get ahead of myself, so I often have to remind myself that not everything needs to be solved at once, and that everything is ‘figureoutable.’ I’ll also remind myself to try and look at one single step, rather than the whole staircase. 3. When overwhelmed, I try to step back and have perspective. Crises feel huge in the moment, so I’ll often remind myself that it will pass, that it will become a memory soon, and that I’ve been through countless overwhelming moments before, and this is just another one of them! Stress and overwhelm are natural parts of life and work, so I also try to be very gentle, self-compassionate, and accepting while navigating stress.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://newvistamentalhealth.com/
- Instagram: RachelRossiCounseling
