Meet Melinda Fouts, Ph, D.

We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Melinda Fouts, Ph, D. a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.

Melinda , so many exciting things to discuss, we can’t wait. Thanks for joining us and we appreciate you sharing your wisdom with our readers. So, maybe we can start by discussing optimism and where your optimism comes from?

I’ve always been an optimist. The alternative isn’t very appealing to me. We all know the saying, “You can look at a glass half empty or half full.” I have changed it to this, you have a glass and something is in it. When we remove the dualistic mindset of right/wrong, light/dark, then you open up to viewing the world differently.
The optimistic mindset has always pulled me through when encountering setbacks, disappointments, and failures. It is not an unrealistic mindset, but one that propels me to keep going no matter what. My passion is hiking and when you almost arrive at the top, you don’t give up no matter how exhausted you feel. For me, the optimism I have keeps me going and has been instrumental in my success. Where did it come from? Hard to say. From a young age, I saw opportunities and believed in myself enough to go for it.

Thanks for sharing that. So, before we get any further into our conversation, can you tell our readers a bit about yourself and what you’re working on?

Success Starts with You, means, you are the only one who gets in your own way of your success, whatever that means to you. Working with clients is about delving deep into their inner world, their fears, their patterns of behavior that even though they are brilliant and successful, there is something holding them back. Beliefs they are not good enough which is often the root of the imposter syndrome. And, the imposter syndrome keeps them from feeling fully fulfilled at the end of the day. When I started my career as a psychotherapist, I was asked one day standing in the checkout line in a grocery store. What do you specialize in? I thought about all the clients I work with, their issues spanning differing issues, but there was one thing in common. Fear. I told the person, I specialize in fear. He said, “Then everyone needs you! Fear holds us back. Fear is a prison that haunts all those who come to me and yet, are unaware of the root issue being fear. When I listen, I listen to what is not being said because that is where I can discover the underlying fear. Believe it or not, people are afraid of their brilliance, their light. I do what I do because, I want everyone to have more inner peace. If you have inner peace, you have transcended your fears, whatever they may be, whether consciously or unconsciously.

Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?

My father was amazing! At the age of 5, he took me to business meetings, and told me, “No crayons, you will sit, listen and learn.” Well, I mastered listening to the spoken and unspoken very well. By the age of 12, I was consulting my father on his own business. Listening is a craft to be cultivated on a deep level. That is one of three qualities I developed from an early age. If you want to be effective, learn to listen on a deep level to not only what is said, but the unspoken, the body language, facial expressions, etc. It is a craft you can master.
My studies in Jungian psychology gave me the knowledge of developing greater self-awareness. So very hard. You need another person who is willing to be the mirror to you, and is willing to be frank and honest in a compassionate way. My tag line is, “Coaching with an iron fist in a velvet glove.” And, it is done with care and appreciation for the internal struggles. The third skill is who I am. I build trust quickly and that is important. Building a connection with another person is paramount to move towards a relationship.

Alright so to wrap up, who deserves credit for helping you overcome challenges or build some of the essential skills you’ve needed?

It is difficult to name one person as growth and development are a continuous process. When I began my career, Dr. Stan Passy was instrumental in developing my skills and turning them into my personal craft. We met weekly and explored ways to hon in and grow. Throughout the years, new mentors came alongs to keep growing me. The most recent was my professor from Pacifica Graduate Institute, Dr. Lionel Corbett. He and I met weekly for over two years and the result in a new book I authored coming out during the holidays.

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Image Credits

Michael Hefferon

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