Meet J. Robert Parker, C.ht

We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful J. Robert Parker, C.ht. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with J. Robert below.

Hi J. Robert, thank you so much for opening up with us about some important, but sometimes personal topics. One that really matters to us is overcoming Imposter Syndrome because we’ve seen how so many people are held back in life because of this and so we’d really appreciate hearing about how you overcame Imposter Syndrome.

I love this question! It is something that I struggled with a lot; what I came to realize has completely changed the way I look at the world. I’ve come to realize what I believe to be a core fact about society, civilization and humanity: we all think we’re imposters. Each and every one of us, now and throughout history, hopes and prays that the person next to us keeps up their end so no one looks at us and figures out we’re a fraud. And that other person? They are thinking the same thing about you.

We’re all running around with this perfect strawman in our minds, someone we’ve created and can’t even name that is this perfect, unattainable person we compare ourselves to. This person we are impersonating and hope we don’t get caught doing so. This person who doesn’t exist!

So, I stopped comparing myself to imaginary fears and worries. I chose to find out who I am rather than worry over someone thinking I was less-than. It is, after all, impossible to be an imposter when you are determined to be yourself and accept that.

Appreciate the insights and wisdom. Before we dig deeper and ask you about the skills that matter and more, maybe you can tell our readers about yourself?

I am the Director of Twin Ravens Solutions; we are an online-based hypnotherapy, coaching and wellness practice. I named my business after the old Norse legend of Odin’s ravens, Hugin and Munin, whose names translate into Thought and Memory. It seemed appropriate, considering those as the two primary tools I work with.

What’s exciting about all of that is that I feel like I offer something special: change. Change in thinking, in behavior and in the way you see both the world and your Self. Quite a claim, I know… but I offer this not through tricks and nonsense, but through education, demonstration and results. Results-based is the phrase I so often use, but it’s the very backbone of what I do.

At my core, I am a stubborn skeptic; sometimes to the point of it being more limiting than useful. Even with that, the things that I have learned and put into practice have changed my life! It is that that fuels the passion in what I do.

There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?

Looking back, there are 3 clear things that stand out as both impactful and useful to me:

1. Compassion- One of the things that I emphasize in my day to day is understanding that we are human and that simple fact is hard. Learning to connect with other people, not from a position of understanding but from a position of acceptance was vital.

2. Communication- Hypnosis is, at its core, advanced communication. Communication beyond just language and the conscious mind; including the subconscious in the conversation. To do that, I had to learn first how to truly communicate and express myself.

3. Forgiveness- This may seem like an odd one to include on a list like this, but it may be the most important. To move beyond who we have been, we must both forgive and embrace that past and that version of Self. I really had to learn how to love and forgive myself while never forgetting that person and the lesson they learned.

To anyone looking to develop these things, it’s simple. All it takes is two things, focused inward: trust and honesty. Simple, but not easy. Be genuine, be authentic and be true to who you want to be.

Who is your ideal client or what sort of characteristics would make someone an ideal client for you?

For the longest time, I wasn’t sure how to answer this question. After several years of business, I can answer this question clearly.

My ideal client is one that has encountered difficulty with previous attempts to grow or change. Usually highly analytical, my client is the type to usually say something along the lines of ‘that doesn’t work for me’ or ‘I don’t understand why so I can’t follow”. I find that I communicate best with those who have the most difficulty feeling understood.

As I said before, I became the person that I always needed; by describing my ideal client, I am only just describing myself!

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