Meet Jola Cruise

We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Jola Cruise a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.

Hi Jola, we’re so appreciative of you taking the time to share your nuggets of wisdom with our community. One of the topics we think is most important for folks looking to level up their lives is building up their self-confidence and self-esteem. Can you share how you developed your confidence?

My journey to confidence and self-esteem was a long road shaped by significant personal challenges and growth. Early in my marriage, I felt secure and fulfilled. My husband and I built a business together, and I thrived on his affirmations and gratitude. However, as life became more demanding with the arrival of our children and the shift in our work responsibilities, my confidence started to waver. I found myself lost, struggling with resentment, and constantly feeling inadequate.

Seeking help, I turned to therapy, counseling, and life coaches, but nothing seemed to resolve our issues or rebuild my self-worth. It wasn’t until I discovered a set of skills focused on personal responsibility, communication, and acceptance that I truly began to change. These skills empowered me to let go of resentment, see my own value beyond external validation, and take responsibility for my happiness. I learned that by changing my behavior and my mindset, I could transform my relationship and my life.

Over time, practicing these skills gave me a renewed sense of purpose and confidence. I started to believe in myself as an individual, not just in relation to my roles as a wife or mother. I explored new passions, pursued personal goals, and began speaking and coaching, which only deepened my self-assurance. Today, I can confidently say that these tools not only transformed my marriage but also unlocked a version of myself that I had never known—strong, empowered, and deeply at peace.

Thanks for sharing that. So, before we get any further into our conversation, can you tell our readers a bit about yourself and what you’re working on?

Getting on stage and sharing my story is one of the most fulfilling parts of my journey. Growing up in a broken family, I experienced the profound impact of a struggling marriage firsthand, which drives my commitment to helping others find healing and connection.

Through modeling, I gained confidence and learned to express myself publicly, skills that transitioned seamlessly into speaking and coaching. Today, I work with women one-on-one and in groups, guiding them with a unique methodology that empowers them to save their marriages singlehandedly—even in the face of betrayal, PTSD, narcissism, or feeling entirely alone. This approach is powerful because it doesn’t require both partners to participate; instead, it teaches women how they can create change, find their voice, and heal their relationships independently.

Every time I take the stage, my goal is to bring hope to those who feel there’s none left, showing them that they can create peace and resilience, even if they’ve never seen it modeled before.

There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?

Looking back, three qualities have been the most impactful on my journey: resilience, self-awareness, and the ability to empower others through relationship skills. Each has uniquely shaped my life and work, and they’re essential for anyone beginning their own journey of personal or relational transformation.

Resilience: The ability to keep moving forward, even through setbacks, has been foundational. Resilience taught me that growth isn’t a straight line, and even when things felt difficult, I knew I could keep going. For those early in their journey, practice resilience by viewing challenges as opportunities for growth. Small setbacks don’t define the outcome—how you respond to them does. Embrace them as part of the process, not a reason to give up.

Self-Awareness: Understanding myself—my emotions, reactions, and patterns—has been crucial in creating real change. It helped me recognize the role I play in my relationships, allowing me to take responsibility rather than place blame. To develop this, take time daily to reflect, whether through journaling or mindfulness practices. Self-awareness grows with consistent, gentle curiosity about your thoughts and feelings, helping you become a more compassionate and grounded partner.

Empowering Relationship Skills: Learning skills and tools that transformed my approach to my relationship was life-changing. Practicing self-care, embracing feminine energy, appreciating our differences, and regularly practicing gratitude were incredibly powerful. Shifting perspectives and finding small positives in almost any situation created lasting harmony. For those starting out, I recommend focusing on communication, emotional resilience, and tools like gratitude and self-care. Seek out communities, books, or mentors that offer practical guidance and begin applying these principles daily to see subtle but powerful changes.

By cultivating these qualities, you build a foundation for real growth and connection, setting yourself up for deeper, more fulfilling relationships.

Awesome, really appreciate you opening up with us today and before we close maybe you can share a book recommendation with us. Has there been a book that’s been impactful in your growth and development?

One book that deeply influenced my development is The Empowered Wife by Laura Doyle. It emphasizes that women hold significant power in relationships and provides a clear blueprint of skills and tools for a thriving marriage.

A core insight is that women can be the catalysts for positive change, often without needing their partner to change. This idea empowered me to approach my marriage proactively. The book also stresses the importance of self-care and self-fulfillment, showing that nurturing ourselves is key to creating a happy, balanced relationship.

Additionally, Doyle’s communication techniques—like expressing desires without control or criticism—helped me build more trust and respect. By following this blueprint, I learned how small, intentional changes can bring lasting joy and intimacy into a marriage.

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Image Credits

Makenzie Rae Photography, Heather Wulfemeyer

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