Meet Heather Murphy

Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Heather Murphy. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.

Heather, sincerely appreciate your selflessness in agreeing to discuss your mental health journey and how you overcame and persisted despite the challenges. Please share with our readers how you overcame. For readers, please note this is not medical advice, we are not doctors, you should always consult professionals for advice and that this is merely one person sharing their story and experience.

You have to fight for your right to be happy!

I used to struggle with depression and anxiety, starting when I was 9 years old. I remember one of my neighbors called me a shoe gazer because I always walked home staring at the ground in front of me. I also experienced a lot of anxiety. I was always worried about everything and felt uncomfortable all the time. Over the years this showed up in my behavior with emotional ups and downs.

As a young adult, I lived outside the box. I struggled with poverty. I was homeless a couple of times. I had a hard time holding down a job. I felt isolated a lot. And I used drugs and alcohol to cope with my emotions.

I was almost 22 when I decided I wanted a better life. I was given a beautiful opportunity to move to San Diego. I started going to college. But I still struggled with my mental health. I found that if I worked harder and more often, my depression stayed away, but my anxiety was worse. So, I continued to drink heavily every day to cope with that.

There was one chapter in my 20s when I had lost five people in my life in a single year. It was a lot of death to cope with. I entered one of the darkest depressions I’ve ever experienced. I became isolated. I couldn’t show up for work anymore. After a few weeks of watching the entire series of Shameless (the British version), I knew I needed to do something. And because I had no money for mental health services, I decided to go to the Buddhist temple and start meditating. And it helped more than I thought it would. So I kept doing it. I started meditating every morning. And my life got better in so many ways. I started working out, which, by the way, if you struggle with depression, just do it! You’ve got to move your body! I was eating healthier. I got back to work. My friendships improved. I could show up again as myself.

But still, the anxiety would come and go. What was this? Why did certain things trigger me? I could feel it in my body. As I dove deeper into meditation and hypnotherapy, some difficult memories came back to me that I had blocked out. But what was I to do about them? Yeah, some bad things happened. But how do you just “get over it”? Without getting into the details of my traumas, I’ll just share that we all have some. Big, little, it doesn’t matter, it lives within us in some way. Sometimes, it impacts your life negatively, and sometimes, it can be positive, such as when you become resilient after difficult situations. For me, it was a toss-up. I would hustle and work so hard, which is seen as a good thing. But then I would burn out and dissociate in my bed for three days.

One day, I learned about a somatic life coaching certification from an influencer I followed. It was a career path I had begun with to help people who were struggling with their mental health. I didn’t even know what I was getting myself into. I spent 11 months getting that certification and another 6 months learning trauma-informed breathwork. It rocked my world. I didn’t even realize how disconnected I was from my body despite over 10 years of meditation practice at that point.

What I’ve learned is that we must include the body in our healing journey. The nervous system holds so much information, and just like we use meditation to calm the mind, we must use somatic and nervous system practices to calm the body. I have come to believe in this bottom-up approach because I no longer struggle with anxiety.

In fact, I’ve realized that somatics and embodiment are the keys to creating the life you want! If you want to attract a new partner, job, better health, whatever, you have to embody and be the version of you that has those things.

My mission is to help people learn to love themselves, to take care of their mental health through nervous system regulation, and to be their fully expressed selves.

You should never give up the right to be happy. There is always a way.

Thanks, so before we move on maybe you can share a bit more about yourself?

After graduating with a BFA in Painting from Humboldt State, I started to wonder what I would do with this degree. I initially wanted to become a painting professor at some prestigious university. But because I was a mother and things were shifting in my husband’s career, I started to think more about the life I wanted to create with my family and what job I could do while keeping my family in mind.

I was already making content about mental health, and people resonated with it, so I decided to open up a coaching practice. I had no idea what I was doing. But I had a lot of advice I was willing to give away. My coaching journey has had many twists and turns. But I love holding space for people. I love helping people move into emotional and energetic mastery. I love teaching somatics and breathwork. I love seeing people take their power back and create their authentic life.

Several times over the last 5 years of coaching, I thought I should have gone to school for psychology. And in 2021, I started seriously thinking about becoming a therapist. Applying and getting into grad school was a journey in itself. But I found the perfect program for me. I am currently studying Expressive Arts Therapy at the California Institute of Integral Studies, where I’ll receive a master’s in counseling in 2026. Art saved my life. And I love learning about these modalities and incorporating them into my coaching work.
I look forward to having a therapy practice to focus on the mental health side of personal growth, and my coaching work will continue to help people create the life they want.

Currently, my work is focused on helping overly stimulated, ambitious moms break free from stress and burnout so they can create and manifest the life of their dreams through the power of embodiment. I love that my work combines somatics, energetics, and expressive arts. It’s the perfect blend of work focusing on mind, body, and soul. I see how it helps moms regulate their nervous system, be calm at home and in their careers, and find more empowerment through authentic self-expression.

I’m excited about building a community of moms who want access to tools that only take a few minutes daily. We don’t have much time, so it’s nice to be guided in a few minutes of movement, breath, or art. I see how this sets so many moms free to become more themselves.

If you’re new to embodiment, I have a sweet coloring book/journal called “Manifestations Embodied,” with a free course on embodying your manifestations. It teaches you the first somatic tool you need to know and all about embodiment. This is a great place to start. Then, if you’re ready, you can consider joining Embodied Forces. This formerly was a 4-month group coaching program that is shifting into membership with breathwork, movement, and expressive arts practices. I am working toward growing a community of moms to feel supported and regulated in their bodies while they build the lives of their dreams.

There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?

Self-care is a non-negotiable. I struggled with co-dependency for a long time. It worsened my marriage because I always looked outside of myself to feel loved, safe, and secure. When I finally started to prioritize my mental health and well-being, my life and relationships improved. I was able to be the mother I wanted to be. I was able to show up more energized in my career.

If you’re struggling with mental health such as depression, learn everything you can about it. But most importantly, know what helps you feel better and do that more! Then, take it further and surround yourself with people who do those things that make you feel good. I know it can be hard to get going when it comes to depression. But for some time there, I would write a list of three things before bed that I needed to do the next day to keep depression at bay. Sometimes, at first, it was brushing my teeth, eating food, and going for a walk. Please keep it simple and then grow. Plus, your brain will get addicted to the dopamine hit you get when you cross that item off your list.

Just Be. Being present can be challenging in this modern society. We are always running toward our future as if our past were a tiger. Being the embodiment of the life you want right now is enough. Stop and smell the roses, do a little doodle on your post in a note, close your eyes and breathe, shake your body, and look around because, as Confucious closely said, “wherever you go, there you are.” There is nothing to escape from. Just live, breathe, move, and make life beautiful.

What do you do when you feel overwhelmed? Any advice or strategies?

Everyone gets overwhelmed; it’s normal if you have a dream and want to go after it. But on top of that dream, you have to get your kid to dance class, make dinner, and block out time to remodel the bathroom this weekend (did I mention my husband and I are restoring a cabin). Not to mention, you might need to take a shower and get to bed at a decent hour. The to-do list can feel never-ending. And the fact is that it’s true! There will always be dishes. There will always be errands. There will always be home maintenance. And sometimes, you’re going to trip up and drop the ball. It’s essential to learn to be flexible and let things go sometimes.

So, when I get overwhelmed, I stop what I’m doing, and I regulate my nervous system. There is no way your brain can think clearly enough to decide what the most important thing to do now is when your body thinks you’re running from a tiger. So, stop and take 3 minutes to be with your breath, move your body, or make some art. From there, you will know that you need to do only 1-3 things today. Everything else can be tended to another day.

One last thing: if there are tasks, situations, or people that you have a pattern of getting overwhelmed by, you need to nip that in the bud. Create maintenance schedules for your life, such as morning and after-work routines. Cut out situations that overwhelm you. Do your kids need to have an activity every day after school? Stop being a taxi, cut back on extracurriculars, or set up a carpool. Do you have a person in your life that keeps pissing you off? Set a clear boundary. An example might be, “Hey, I need you to be on time when we have a meeting.” Most importantly, you should make time to relax and enjoy life.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.fortheloveofself.com
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/heathermurphy_thatsme/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/keepittogetherheather/
• Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@fortheloveofself

Image Credits

Jennifer Lothrigel