Meet Mary Tomassetti

We were lucky to catch up with Mary Tomassetti recently and have shared our conversation below.

Mary, so great to have you with us and we want to jump right into a really important question. In recent years, it’s become so clear that we’re living through a time where so many folks are lacking self-confidence and self-esteem. So, we’d love to hear about your journey and how you developed your self-confidence and self-esteem.

How I Developed My Confidence & Self-Esteem
I’ve always done things a little differently, and while that made me stand out in great ways, it also meant I was often misunderstood. Growing up, people didn’t always understand why I approached things the way I did, and I was constantly made fun of for it. But that never stopped me from believing in myself. I was always confident in my ability to figure things out, and my optimism kept me moving forward.

For a long time, my confidence flourished as I kept proving myself, learning, and growing. I loved challenging myself and excelling, and I thrived in environments where I could contribute in meaningful ways. As I started operating at a higher level—making decisions, recognizing opportunities others overlooked, and pushing past limitations—I realized that my growth didn’t just go unsupported; it sometimes triggered resentment. Instead of encouragement, I faced belittlement and challenges from people who had no real intention of finding resolution. Despite my best efforts to uplift and include them, nothing seemed to change. This was difficult to accept—I wanted so badly to be in an environment where everyone could succeed together. But over time, I came to understand that I couldn’t control how others responded to my growth, only how I chose to move forward.

For a while, it affected me. I was anxious, depleted, and constantly overthinking my next move all while having nothing but pure intentions. I hated upsetting people, even when I knew I was doing the right thing. Deep down, I knew something important—I knew that the way those people operated wasn’t aligned with my morals and values. And that was what I needed to base my next decision on, no matter how much my heart wanted to keep fixing things. I had to let go of the idea that I could create peace with people who weren’t open to it. Instead of asking, “Am I capable?” I shifted my mindset to “How will I do this?” That one change made all the difference.

Whenever I felt uncertain, I focused on action. If I didn’t know something, I learned. If I wasn’t the best at something, I found ways to improve. If something felt overwhelming, I broke it down into small, focused steps. I learned from the moments when I wasn’t enough—not as failures, but as feedback and a reality check. I never pretended to be perfect or all-knowing, but I also never let the fear of being wrong hold me back. I embraced being wrong because I understood that it’s one of the fastest ways to grow.

I think it’s important to note that there were moments when I had to act confident before I fully felt it. For me, confidence isn’t about pretending—it’s about trusting myself. Even if I don’t have the answers right now, I know I will find them. That’s what real confidence is—showing up, taking action, and believing that no matter what happens, I’ll figure it out. And I’ve learned that having genuinely good people around you makes all of this so much easier.

How Confidence Has Changed the Way I Lead and Make Decisions:
The biggest shift in my confidence is that I no longer feel the need to control every detail—I focus on the bigger picture. I surround myself with people who are great at what they do, and that allows me to lead at a higher level. I don’t hesitate to take risks, make tough decisions, or set boundaries because I’ve seen firsthand how avoiding hard choices only makes things harder later. Confidence, for me, isn’t about knowing everything—it’s about trusting that you can navigate anything.

Appreciate the insights and wisdom. Before we dig deeper and ask you about the skills that matter and more, maybe you can tell our readers about yourself?

I am the Co-Founder & CEO of Mane Techniques, a salon and education-based business dedicated to setting new standards in the hair and hair extension industry. I am also the Co-Founder & CEO of Petite Retreat, a suite where you can give your body the full healing it deserves with the perfect synergy of Head Spa services, Reiki, FDA approved light therapy, and infrared sauna experiences.

What started as a salon quickly evolved into something bigger—an ecosystem designed to elevate both stylists and clients through education, innovation, and exceptional service. Mane Techniques and Petite Retreat are not just about beauty; it’s about empowering professionals with the tools, training, and business strategies to build sustainable, fulfilling careers.

Beyond the beauty industry, I’m also involved in commercial real estate investments, specifically acquiring and developing properties that create long-term value and strategic growth opportunities. My work in both companies is connected by the same philosophy: creating systems and environments where people can thrive. Whether it’s helping stylists scale their careers or developing properties that serve businesses and communities, my passion is building something bigger than myself.

What excites me the most is the impact—seeing people grow. There is no better feeling than watching a team member gain financial freedom through the infrastructure and education programs we’ve built. I take a structured, strategic approach to success, blending creativity with business acumen to ensure that both my salon and real estate ventures are positioned to operate at the highest level.

What’s Next?
I am currently focused on expanding the businesses through education, development, and innovative business models. My goal is to continue leading with integrity, pushing forward, and helping others build success along the way.

Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?

Three Qualities That Were Most Impactful in My Journey
Looking back, three key qualities have had the biggest impact on my success: adaptability, strategic thinking, and integrity. These weren’t just things I happened to be good at—they were skills I actively developed through experience, challenges, and a relentless commitment to growth.

1. Adaptability – The Ability to Pivot & Problem-Solve

Nothing ever goes exactly as planned, and the ability to pivot without losing momentum is essential. Whether it was restructuring my business model, navigating resistance from others, or learning how to lead at a higher level, being adaptable allowed me to stay ahead of challenges rather than be defeated by them.

Advice for Those Early in Their Journey:
-Stay curious. If something isn’t working, don’t take it personally—figure out why and adjust.
-Embrace discomfort. Growth comes from pushing past what feels familiar.
-Ask better questions. Instead of “Can I do this?” ask, “How can I make this work?”

2. Strategic Thinking – Looking Beyond the Immediate & Playing the Long Game

Success isn’t just about hard work—it’s about making smart, intentional moves that align with a bigger vision. Every decision I’ve made—whether in my personal life, business, leadership, or real estate—was based on understanding the long-term impact rather than just immediate gains. This mindset has helped me build sustainable businesses and scalable systems rather than chasing short-term wins.

Advice for Those Early in Their Journey:
-Zoom out. Always consider how today’s choices affect the bigger picture.
-Make data-driven decisions. Emotions and instincts matter, but they should be backed by logic and research.
-Learn from those ahead of you. Find mentors or study the paths of those who’ve built long-term success.

3. Integrity – Leading with Values, Not Just Ambition
At the end of the day, how you succeed matters just as much as if you succeed. I’ve had moments where people tried to undermine me, challenge me for the sake of resistance, or operate in ways that didn’t align with my values. What kept me grounded was knowing that I never compromised on what I believed was right. Success is only meaningful when it’s built on trust, fairness, and a true commitment to bettering the people and industries I serve.

Advice for Those Early in Their Journey:
-Know your core values. If you don’t define them, someone else will define them for you.
-Never take shortcuts that compromise your integrity. The right way is often harder, but it’s always worth it.
-Build trust through action, not just words. Integrity isn’t about what you say—it’s about how consistently you show up and follow through.

No matter what industry or path you take, these three things will help you navigate challenges, seize opportunities, and build something that truly lasts. Keep evolving, think long-term, and never compromise on the kind of person you want to be in the process.

As we end our chat, is there a book you can leave people with that’s been meaningful to you and your development?

One book that has played a significant role in my development is “The One Thing” by Gary Keller and Jay Papasan. It fundamentally changed how I approach productivity, decision-making, and business growth by reinforcing the idea that focusing on the most important task at any given time leads to extraordinary results.

Most Impactful Nuggets of Wisdom:
1. Focus on the One Thing That Makes Everything Else Easier
-This book challenged the way I used to juggle multiple priorities at once. Instead of trying to do everything at the same time, I now ask myself:
“What’s the one thing I can do right now that will make everything else easier or unnecessary?”
This shift in mindset has helped me streamline my business strategies, delegate more effectively, and focus on high-impact decisions.

2. Success is Built Through Small, Consistent Actions
Small, intentional actions compound over time to create massive success. In business, I’ve applied this by breaking down big goals into manageable steps, ensuring that progress is always being made rather than waiting for the “perfect” moment.

3. Time Blocking is the Key to Productivity
Instead of reacting to constant distractions, I schedule time blocks to focus on high-value tasks.
Whether it’s strategic planning for Mane Techniques, date nights with my fiancee, real estate investments, or leadership development, I now structure my time to ensure that the most important work gets my full attention.

4. Saying No is Just as Important as Saying Yes
This was the hardest for me to learn, and I still struggle with it. The reality of knowing I am doing my team a disservice if I say yes to too many things has been the consequence that holds me accountable, and lets me feel good about saying no. Not everything deserves my energy, and learning to say no to distractions, unnecessary tasks, and low-value commitments has been game-changing. This has helped me set better boundaries, protect my time, and stay aligned with my long-term vision.

“The One Thing” reinforced the importance of prioritization, focused effort, and strategic decision-making. It’s helped me cut through the noise, stay intentional with my time, and build businesses that are both scalable and impactful. If you’re feeling overwhelmed by everything you have to do, this book teaches you how to simplify, focus, and achieve more by doing less—but doing it exceptionally well. This book, Atomic Habits, and my mother’s discipline are the reasons my ability to effectively manage my ADD has grown exponentially.

Contact Info:

• Website: manetechniques.com petiteretreatwellness.com
• Instagram: @Mary.T.Techniques @manetechniques @PetiteRetreat_Wellness
• Linkedin: Mary Tomassetti

Image Credits

Jonathan Arena- Individual image of me
Philip Kramer- Pink background image with stool