Meet Matthew Pulley

We recently connected with Matthew Pulley and have shared our conversation below.

Matthew, we are so appreciative of you taking the time to open up about the extremely important, albeit personal, topic of mental health. Can you talk to us about your journey and how you were able to overcome the challenges related to mental issues? For readers, please note this is not medical advice, we are not doctors, you should always consult professionals for advice and that this is merely one person sharing their story and experience.

Mental health has been of utmost importance to myself as well as my family in my continued journey. I started Cafe Ghost with the intent to help myself become something more. My history behind this accomplishment started just after my return from deployment to Afghanistan with the United States Army. The following months were extremely difficult. My team returned as soon as Covid was kicking off and there are many factors that play into my darkest days. With everything being shut down seeming to be one of the biggest contributing factor. My symptoms of post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) started about a month following return and gradually became worse and worse. This ultimately resulted in me becoming addicted to alcohol in order to cope with the near hourly panic attacks while awake. Long story short was this continued until deteriorate until thoughts of suicide and a plan presented and I completed a stay in a mental health hospital. It has been five years since this has happened and my recovery has been thanks to multiple avenues. I continue through therapy and follow up through the Veteran’s Affairs Medical Center. One of the biggest things that has helped in my recovery is established Cafe Ghost. This gave me a new purpose and goal, and it continues to give lasting purpose. I made this cafe in an effort to create a safe place for my community for any needs that it has. My goal isn’t to make money, it is to ensure a welcoming presence. This has helped me rid myself of this addiction, continue to seek treatment, and heavily advocate for everyone, not just veterans to seek help to better their mental health. Seeking help is NOT a weakness, it is one of the strongest things I have ever done.

Thanks, so before we move on maybe you can share a bit more about yourself?

By trade I am an Emergency Room Nurse turned Entrepreneur. Cafe Ghost was created out of my absolute love for coffee, need for continued adventure, and need to give back to my community. I had been contemplating starting a coffee shop for years. This obsession became so ingrained in my routine at home that my coffee bar rivals many commercial set ups. My small town of Bloomfield, Missouri was to have a coffee shop introduced by a local brand from a neighboring city, when they dropped out I knew it was my sign to dive all in, and dive in I definitely did. The initial building was in complete disrepair and it took six months of heavy renovation to make it even resemble an operational space. It also is important to mention that downtown Bloomfield has been in a similar state, but over the past few years we have begun to gradually revitalize our small town.
Cafe Ghost was a distinct name given in homage to my time in the military and the team that I had deployed to Afghanistan with. We were a surgical team that provided immediate frontline care to injured soldiers and our mascot we adopted was a ghost. Always there, but often unseen. I continued namesake in my cafe to always remind me of all the good I accomplished and the lives that I saved. Although my goals have changed drastically my care and need to further my fellow humans remains the same.

There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?

This is quite a difficult question to answer. With most things in life I believe our skills are combination of our experiences. The three most important skills and qualities root back to my time growing up and heavily influenced during my nursing career and time in the military. These skills include unrivaled care for everyone around me, absolute commitment to anything I set my mind to, and the continued need to improve myself.
The best advice that I could give to those early in their journey is to not give up and ask when you need help. I am only one year in this journey so I consider myself early in my journey of Cafe Ghost. My nursing career is where this stems from. We are always told to ask and question everything. The most dangerous nurse the one that thinks they know everything. Learn something new everyday. If you don’t, you’ve become complacent. Complacency kills. Always question and learn.

If you knew you only had a decade of life left, how would you spend that decade?

I’ve thought about this about this quite often some times more than most. I have gone through so many challenges in my life, so many ups and downs, and have found myself at rock bottom. There have been many instances that I believed I only had a few instances left to live, or wanted to end it of my own free will. TO BE CERTAIN THIS IS NEVER THE RIGHT PATH! Sure life is difficult and we all have our demons to contend with. Spend your days with those that YOU want to be with. Those that want to be around you and help you will ensure that you are around longer than that decade.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.cafeghostcoffee.com
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100093636325006

Image Credits

Preston Tilley – Made Visible Media