We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Dr. Tristaca McCray a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.
Hi Dr. Tristaca, so excited to talk about all sorts of important topics with you today. The first one we want to jump into is about being the only one in the room – for some that’s being the only person of color or the only non-native English speaker or the only non-MBA, etc Can you talk to us about how you have managed to be successful even when you were the only one in the room that looked like you?
There have been countless moments of stepping into spaces where no one looked the same, a woman of color standing tall, the only one carrying lived experience as a badge of honor, the youngest voice in a room full of noise. In those moments, the weight of being “the only one” was undeniable, but so was the power. Being different isn’t something to hide. It’s a radiant declaration of purpose. It’s not a disadvantage; it’s a divine design. The presence that once felt alone now walks in with authority, not just to be seen, but to shift the atmosphere that God has called me to do.
There is no more shrinking to fit rooms that were never built to hold this greatness. This is about new rooms, blazing new paths, and opening doors wide enough for others to walk through. Every step is taken with intention. Every move honors the legacy of those who came before and clears the way for those still to come. From founding NERDS RULE INC. to creating healing sanctuaries like A Brave Space, this journey has never been about fitting in, it’s always been about becoming. About saying yes to purpose. About planting seeds of healing, faith, and radical love. About forgiving quicker, loving deeper, dreaming louder, and standing tall in storms.
Being “the only one” teaches what true leadership looks like: saying what needs to be said even when your voice trembles, shining bright even when others try to dim your light, and showing up fully even when misunderstood. Success is not about being accepted; it’s about being authentic.
To every soul reading this:
Never let anyone reduce your magic to fit their comfort.
You were born to stand out, to build, to lead.
You are the blueprint. You are the spark. You are the dream that generations before you prayed for.
So keep showing up.
Keep rising.
Keep speaking, healing, leading, loving.
Even if you’re the only one in the room, walk in like you belong there. Because you do.
You were not created to be invisible.
You were created to be unforgettable.
Don’t just take up space, transform it.
And no matter what, never stop.
Great, so let’s take a few minutes and cover your story. What should folks know about you and what you do?
Over the years, I have stepped boldly into the calling on my life to lead, to serve, and to transform. As the Founder and CEO of NERDS RULE INC., I’ve grown from a visionary with a passion for healing communities into a global leader whose work is rooted in love, purpose, and power. My journey has never been about titles, it’s been about impact. It’s been about planting seeds of transformation that flourish into lasting change.
Since launching NERDS RULE INC. in 2011, I have used every gift within my creativity, empathy, and resilience to build pathways for people who are often forgotten. What sets our work apart isn’t just the programs or the accolades; it’s the soul behind it. Whether through educational initiatives, mental wellness programs, or community empowerment projects, I lead with intention, guided by the belief that healing and leadership go hand in hand.
In 2024, I published “My Butterfly Wings”, a collection of poems that reflect my evolution stories of pain turned into purpose, vulnerability turned into vision. This body of work is more than poetry; it’s a love letter to those still finding their wings, and a testimony that strength lies in rising, again and again. What excites me most is not just what we do but who we become in the process. Through the NERDS RULE INC. Academy and our healing spaces like A Brave Space, we witness lives shift. Young people find their voices. Women reclaim their power. Veterans rediscover their worth. These aren’t just programs, they are lifelines.
As a mentor, I walk alongside those I serve. As a friend, I listen deeply. And as a woman in leadership, I stand unapologetically in my truth, modeling what it looks like to lead with heart, vision, and courage. I am constantly evolving, tapping into new dimensions of my gifts while helping others uncover their own.
In October 2025, NERDS RULE INC. will celebrate 14 years of relentless dedication and impact. We’ve expanded across borders and cultures, but our core remains the same: to uplift, to educate, and to heal. My leadership is a reflection of every life we’ve touched and every dream we’ve helped ignite. From humble beginnings to international stages, I am living proof that your roots don’t define your reach. I lead not just with strategy, but with spirit. My brand, my mission, and my movement are all grounded in this truth: when love leads, anything is possible. You don’t need permission to be powerful. I didn’t. And now, I’m here to remind others: your story matters. Your vision matters. And your leadership is needed now more than ever.
Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
As I reflect on my journey, I can say with deep conviction that three powerful qualities have been instrumental in shaping the woman, leader, and visionary I’ve become: resilience, emotional intelligence, and purpose-driven leadership. These are not just traits, they are tools for transformation. If you’re stepping into your calling, I hope these reflections uplift and empower you to keep rising.
Resilience has been my anchor through life’s storms. It’s the quiet strength that carried me when the world felt heavy, and the light that guided me through seasons of uncertainty. I’ve learned that true resilience isn’t about being unbreakable; it’s about rising each time you fall, with greater clarity, courage, and grace. Challenges will come. Doors may close. But within every hardship lies a lesson, a breakthrough, and a chance to rise stronger than before. Let every setback teach you, not define you.
Emotional intelligence has opened doors that credentials never could. It’s the gift that allows us to lead with compassion, connect with authenticity, and respond with wisdom. In every boardroom, classroom, and healing space I’ve entered, emotional intelligence has been my superpower. It’s about being tuned into your emotions and those of others, so that communication becomes connection, and leadership becomes legacy. If you want to deepen this skill, start with presence. Listen with intention. Feel with discernment. Lead with heart.
Leading with purpose is what gives breath to everything I do. My work has always been about more than goals or titles—it’s about impact. Purpose fuels passion, ignites perseverance, and draws the right people to your mission. When you are clear on your “why,” no obstacle can truly derail you. You begin to move with intention, knowing that every step forward, no matter how small, is part of something bigger than yourself. So, take time to reflect. Ask yourself: What sets my soul on fire? Who am I here to serve? When you lead from that place, you become unstoppable.
To those at the beginning of their journey: know this, you are equipped. You are enough. And every day is another chance to grow into the leader you’re meant to be. Develop your resilience like a muscle. Nurture your emotional intelligence like a garden. And let your purpose be the compass that guides your every move. Believe in the power within you. The world needs your voice, your vision, and your light. Keep showing up. Keep becoming. You are the change you’ve been waiting for.
Awesome, really appreciate you opening up with us today and before we close maybe you can share a book recommendation with us. Has there been a book that’s been impactful in your growth and development?
The book that has profoundly shaped my evolution is My Butterfly Wings, a soul-stirring collection of poetry that I not only wrote but also lived. This isn’t just a book. It’s a mirror, a map, and a love letter to every person who has ever felt broken, silenced, or stuck in the shadows of their own story. My Butterfly Wings was born out of my transformation, written in the quiet spaces where pain met purpose. Each poem is a piece of my journey through trauma, healing, faith, and rebirth. Through its pages, I peeled back the layers of fear, grief, and self-doubt and found my voice again. And now, I’ve placed that voice into your hands so you can rise.
One of the most powerful revelations within this book is that healing isn’t neat or predictable. It’s raw. It’s real. It asks you to sit with the darkness long enough to find your light. Healing isn’t about perfection, it’s about progress. It’s about learning to breathe again when life has knocked the wind out of you. It’s about breaking open so something beautiful can bloom. This book isn’t only for poetry lovers, it’s for the woman rediscovering her strength, the teen who feels unseen, the soul aching to be reminded they are not alone. Whether you’re navigating loss, heartache, identity, or simply trying to reconnect with yourself, My Butterfly Wings holds space for you.
If you’ve ever felt like no one could understand your pain, this book says: I see you. You’re not alone. And yes, you will rise. Available now on Amazon, My Butterfly Wings is more than poetry; it’s a sacred invitation to begin again. It’s a healing companion, a daily reminder of your worth, and a testament that even from the deepest wounds, beauty can emerge.
For those craving more, I’ve also created companion journals, sacred spaces where you can continue your own journey of writing, releasing, and reclaiming. These tools are designed to help you stay grounded as you rise higher. So, when you open this book, know that you are not just reading, you are rising. Straighten your crown. Embrace your wings. And remember: no matter how heavy the past, you are destined to fly with boldness, with unshakable grace.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.nerds-rule-inc.org
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nerds_rule_inc/
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tristaca-mccray-ph-d-nerds-rule-inc-a490a1155/
Image Credits
NERDS RULE INC. and Shellanee Marie
so if you or someone you know deserves recognition please let us know here.
