Meet Marina Swann

We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Marina Swann. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Marina below.

Marina, so good to have you with us today. We’ve always been impressed with folks who have a very clear sense of purpose and so maybe we can jump right in and talk about how you found your purpose?

I’m an artist, a musician, a songwriter, and it took me 35 years to start taking it seriously and pursuing it as a career. What it took was some things that happened to me – going through deep grief and loss and finding the kind of love that sees me for who I am and supports all my expressions. It also took things that I did myself – kicking alcohol addiction, adopting growth mindset, creating a support system, and finding a community.

When I was growing up, I felt like for my parents my voice and music were just something to brag about, and no one really cared about supporting the soul in my art, just the skill. I can’t blaim them because it was the 90s in the post-soviet space, times were tough and people mostly thought about putting food on the table, not pursuing creative careers and rich inner life. That led to a long streak of only singing covers, barely showing the songs that I wrote even to my closest friends, and the deepening void between reality and self-perception. I kept writing songs and poetry since I was about 10 years old, I just never took the next step.

Fast-forward a couple of decades, my husband and I lost a baby, and life broke apart. Both our personalities just cracked open. Along with the most overwhelming gut-wrenching pain I’ve ever experienced, and a long depression, came the strongest feeling of courage, purpose, fragility and preciousness of every moment, sence of the thin glass between us and the void. Imagine emotions suddenly hitting you with the force of an ocean wave at every point of the spectrum.

We realised that nothing was holding us back, and moved to the U.S. Eventually we split up, but I still love him deeply and we are close friends to this day, – another gift of shared loss and a decade of marriage. I started to take baby steps bringing music into my life – taking vocal lessons, writing first songs in English, but still felt stuck, until one day I met my current partner. I give him full credit for opening that door inside me, because through his eyes I could see that all my broken parts are still beautiful, that I deserve to take my place in the world, that there is more to life. All that gave me the courage to look at my actual level and skills with a growth mindset, and not being good at something now feels like not being good at something YET. He supports me in a very direct way – getting music gear and arranging my little home studio, making me dinners while I studied music production non-stop along with my day job, being the first listener of every single thing that I write. Now I release music under my own name, and push my production, songwriting and vocal skills further and further every day.

In conclusion to this story I want to say that it’s not like ‘Omg I found my purpose and now my work is done and I live happily ever after’ – just like love, it’s an act. Choosing things that support your purpose every day, walking that path even when it seems like no one cares, because only doing this thing allows you to feel like ‘Ah, that is really me, I’m here, I’m alive, and now I’m sending these little signals into the world,’ and feeling the delicate balance between being a unique kaleidoscope and at the same time belonging to and serving something much bigger that myself.

Thanks, so before we move on maybe you can share a bit more about yourself?

I’m an indie artist releasing music under my name – Marina Swann. It’s melody- and lyrics-driven blend of synthpop, electronica, and alternative, with intricate dynamic productions and a cinematic immersive quality to it. I like to reach deep, write songs that are bigger than me, and treat songwriting like world-building. My songs have nordic elvish surreal vibes – I call it overgrown dreamstate.

I am currently looking for a sync rep to have my music featured in Film and TV (big dream of mine), and I’m always excited to collab with other musicians, producers, dancers, and visual artists – hit me up if my art resonates with you. I recently started to play live shows with a band, next show is coming in January, and I’m announcing everything on my Instagram.

If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?

I would say – resilience, awareness, focus. You have to have the ability to switch between beast working mode (resilience and focus) and self-care princess mode (awareness needed to avoid constant burnout). Creative life is a life of service, it takes sacrifice, so going into it with open eyes and an open mind really helps. It’s painful and messy, it’s not pretty, and frankly most of the time not wealthy either, so if you can NOT do it – don’t. If you feel otherwise – answer the call, no matter if it’s 3AM, if it takes uprooting your life and moving across the world. It will reward you greatly by making each second of your life maybe not happier, but definitely a lot fuller.

What is the number one obstacle or challenge you are currently facing and what are you doing to try to resolve or overcome this challenge?

Once I started releasing music and showing up on Instagram, it brought a lot of work on promotion, marketing, figuring out the business side of it that isn’t sexy, so the next goal is to outsource that as much as I can, and find a sustainable routine that puts music first. It also woke up all the demons – jealousy, resentment, self-pity, comparing streams and views, counting followers. It’s so, so easy to get trapped into measuring success with someone else’s metrics and to feel like there’s always something I’m failing at. It’s a huge trap, and at the moment I’m trying to build awareness around all the hurt ego moments, I talk to my friends about it a lot, collect all the good things that people say about my music, and practice unconditional love and acceptance, letting go of control, limiting my exposure to social media and streaming stats. It’s a trip, and I’ll gladly take advice myself on how to get better at maintaining clarity and vision without much validation from the outside world. Yet 🙂

Contact Info:

Image Credits

Irina Sitnikova
Brien Swann
Alexandra Bronstein
babyoblivi0n

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