We’re looking forward to introducing you to Shana Francesca. Check out our conversation below.
Shana, it’s always a pleasure to learn from you and your journey. Let’s start with a bit of a warmup: Have any recent moments made you laugh or feel proud?
I found out this past weekend that I will be taking the stage at TEDxURI on March 1st and I could not be more proud.
One of the things I love the most about myself is that I am delusionally persistent with a propensity for a well-timed pivot, and this has been key in building my expertise and sharing them via speaking and consulting.
Also, I have learned that listening to clients and mentors and realizing they see things you cannot is vital. Two and a half years ago, a speaker friend asked me, knowing I am a neurodivergent woman, why I didn’t yet have a talk on the subject. I realized it directly relates to my work on leadership and relationships, especially inside of organizations and created the first of two talks I now have on the subject. It’s been two and a half years since and when the opportunity to pitch TEDx URI came up I knew exactly what idea I wanted to spread, and it’s the pitch that ultimately was accepted.
Being surrounded by people who challenge us, and who we participate in challenging, is ultimately how we achieve success. We have to be willing to learn, grow, and change.
Can you briefly introduce yourself and share what makes you or your brand unique?
I am a Neurodivergent woman who was raised in a high-control religion and an abusive household. When I left at twenty-six I had to rebuild my entire life. What I knew pretty early on was that I had no idea how to describe the type of relationships I wanted in my life, such as the kind of friendships and partnerships. At that time, I could describe in great detail what I did not want, but I had no meaningful language to describe what I did want, and that was not going to help me intentionally build a life I loved.
Luckily, I was committed to learning, changing, and growing. That kicked off more than fifteen years of research around what is required for powerful and ethical leadership and relationships.
What I hadn’t expected was that along the way I would gain expertise that were not just helpful to me but to most of us. I now work with organizations on building and supporting cultures rooted in ethical relationship, around curiosity, respect, and accountability – this empowers the kind of investment in ourselves and one another that spurs innovation, profitability, and personal success.
Okay, so here’s a deep one: What breaks the bonds between people—and what restores them?
I see over and over again a defensiveness rooted in what Dr. Carol Dweck would call a fixed mindset. I see people assuming those in their employ, in their family, their students, etc. are who they are and will not change – even more harmful – we too often believe they will not change.
But we know from research that we are not only capable of changing, learning and growing, but that we underestimate how different we will be five years from now and that spills over into our relationships. If we assume that we are who we are, we become unwilling to be accountable for how we show up. If we assume that for ourselves, we are likely doing it for those around us as well.
I know this is something I am constantly working on. It is easy to assign blame and punish those around us, it is much more difficult to be invested in the change we want to see in the world, to take responsibility for our collective learning. The only person we know we can change is ourselves and yet by changing how we show up we become part of a domino effect of change. The question is do we want to deal with the pain of staying the same and remaining defensive or do we want to work through the discomfort of learning, growing, and changing?
We could learn something new every moment for the rest of our lives and still only know the tiniest fraction of what their is to know and understand about the universe. So it makes much more sense to be invested in learning than pretending we know all we need to.
What’s something you changed your mind about after failing hard?
The short answer: scripting keynotes.
For some people, they need a script because they are better at delivering something powerful with a script. I am much better as a speaker with an outline and a plan of action and speaking directly to the audience than scripting a talk.
I tried it once about eighteen months into my speaking journey; it didn’t bomb, but the feedback was that the audience didn’t feel particularly connected to me, and I knew that was a superpower of mine, connecting to audiences. I was crushed.
I knew right then I would never script another talk. I would trust myself to prepare well and then speak from preparation, not memorization. I have never scripted another keynote ever again, and it was the best decision. So glad I learned that fairly early on.
I think our readers would appreciate hearing more about your values and what you think matters in life and career, etc. So our next question is along those lines. Is the public version of you the real you?
For the most part. I have learned that people I don’t know are not owed intimate parts of me, but who they meet when I am on a stage or in a meeting room, facilitating a workshop is the real me, it’s just not all of me.
Before we go, we’d love to hear your thoughts on some longer-run, legacy type questions. If you knew you had 10 years left, what would you stop doing immediately?
Delaying taking vocal lessons and learning some new dances. I have always loved singing and used to lead worship in the high control religion I was raised in but never had any training. I would love to take vocal lessons – for myself.
In a similar vein I was a semi-pro salsa dancer for a number of years in my mid twenties to my early thirties and would love to learn some new dances, maybe down the road get back into performing. Dancing on a stage is much less scary than singing. I honestly believe once you have sang in front of hundreds of people you can do anything.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.concinnate.world/
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/shanafrancesca/
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/shana-francesca/
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@ShanaFrancesca
Image Credits
Marikate Venuto
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