An Inspired Chat with Ellice (Lisa) Halpern of Arlington, Virginia

We recently had the chance to connect with Ellice (Lisa) Halpern and have shared our conversation below.

Hi Ellice (Lisa), thank you for taking the time to reflect back on your journey with us. I think our readers are in for a real treat. There is so much we can all learn from each other and so thank you again for opening up with us. Let’s get into it: What do you think is misunderstood about your business? 
I think that people do not understand what a mediator does and what mediation looks like because most of my clients have not been part of a mediation before. Mediators are neutral at all times, and my job is to empower my clients to identify the issues, brainstorm solutions, evaluate those solutions, and make joint decisions on each identified issue.

Can you briefly introduce yourself and share what makes you or your brand unique?
I am a lawyer who has evolved into a mediator and have owned my business Little Falls Mediation since 2015. My business is based in Arlington, Virginia, and I work remotely when I spend time in California. My youngest child lives in Los Angeles. Our mission is to provide a caring, empathetic environment where clients feel comfortable, safe, and empowered in discussing and resolving conflict. I mainly work with families on marriage, family, divorce and post divorce matters and also help to resolve disputes in community, workplace, and business matters. Mediation is a form of alternative dispute resolution in which the neutral mediator empowers the parties to a dispute to identify the issues, brainstorm solutions, evaluate solutions, and reach joint decisions.

My brand is kindness, rapid response, competence, and transparency. My clients come to me when they are undergoing great stress, and I treat them exactly as I would want to be treated.

I started off as a lawyer. I worked in an executive branch agency in Washington, D.C. after law school, then worked in the U.S. Senate for Senator Ted Stevens from Alaska. I then worked as Washington counsel for the American Medical Association. After I had three children, I decided I wanted to take charge of my schedule. I trained to become a mediator in 2010. I started working at Multi-Door Dispute Resolution in D.C. Courts, handling court referred cases in the Small Claims, Family, and Judge in Chambers programs. I taught Alternative Dispute Resolution (ADR) and Mediation at the Scalia Law School at George Mason University for many semesters. And I guest lectured at American University once each semester as well.

Thanks for sharing that. Would love to go back in time and hear about how your past might have impacted who you are today. What breaks the bonds between people—and what restores them?
I think that a lack of trust can break the bond between people. Sometimes, a genuine apology can help to restore trust.

How do we ensure that apologies are sincere? Rabbi Amy Schwartzman quoted from the book “On Apology” by Aaron Lazare in a sermon she delivered on Rosh Hashanah in 2013 at Temple Rodef Shalom in Falls Church, Virginia. “The first step in apologizing is to recognize our offense and also to recognize its impact on the person hurt. We also have to show we truly regret what we did. We have to actually ask for forgiveness and be prepared to do whatever it takes to mend as much as we can. Finally, an apology is not really complete until, after resolving to refrain from the transgression in the future, we do indeed refrain from repeating the offense when the opportunity arises.”

Mediator Carl D. Schneider quotes E. Kastor from The Repentance Consensus: A Simple Apology Just Doesn’t Cut It and and says that “An apology may be just a brief moment in mediation. Yet it is often the margin of difference, however slight, that allows parties to settle. At heart, many mediations are dealing with damaged relationships. When offered with integrity and timing, an apology can indeed be a critically important moment in mediation. Trust has been broken. An apology, when acknowledged, can restore trust. The past is not erased, but the present is changed.” (What It Means to Be Sorry: the Power of Apology in Mediation, January, 2006.)

If you could say one kind thing to your younger self, what would it be?
I would say, “Don’t worry so much!”

Alright, so if you are open to it, let’s explore some philosophical questions that touch on your values and worldview. Whom do you admire for their character, not their power?
I don’t know Hoda Kotb, although she did grow up in Virginia not far from where I am in Arlington and she graduated from Virginia Tech. I admire all that I know about Hoda — she works hard, she has guts, she left a job at the pinnacle of her career with NBC to start her own company called Joy 101. I can’t wait to read her new book that is coming out this month.

Okay, we’ve made it essentially to the end. One last question before you go. When do you feel most at peace?
I feel most a peace when my people are all happy, healthy, and doing well. My husband and I together have five children, ages 22 to 30., three girls and two boys.

Contact Info:

Image Credits
Head shot: Tim Coburn
Other photo: Jackie Huber, photo at Arlington Women Entrepreneur conference

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