We’re looking forward to introducing you to Nancy McKay. Check out our conversation below.
Hi Nancy, thank you so much for taking time out of your busy day to share your story, experiences and insights with our readers. Let’s jump right in with an interesting one: What do you think is misunderstood about your business?
I think many people who don’t value self-development have several misconceptions about life coaching that prevent them from accessing potentially life-changing support.
“It’s a waste of money” – This perspective often comes from people who haven’t experienced the compound returns of investing in personal growth. What they don’t see is that the cost of remaining stuck – whether in addiction, unfulfilling careers, or destructive patterns – far exceeds the investment in professional guidance. My clients regularly tell me that our work together has paid for itself many times over through improved relationships, career advancement, and most importantly, reclaimed peace of mind.
“Anyone can do it” – This assumption minimizes the extensive training and credentials required to coach effectively. My certifications from Martha Beck, Inc., The Center for Equus Coaching®, and the SHE RECOVERS® Foundation represent years of specialized education. More importantly, my lived experience with addiction recovery and cancer survival, combined with professional training, creates a unique skill set that can’t be replicated by well-meaning friends or generic advice.
“It’s stupid” – This reaction often masks fear or discomfort with vulnerability. What appears “stupid” to some is actually courage – the courage to admit you don’t have all the answers and to seek support for growth. The women I work with aren’t weak; they’re brave enough to invest in becoming their best selves.
“It’s just feel-good advice” – This misconception assumes coaching lacks substance or rigor. In reality, effective coaching involves challenging clients to examine limiting beliefs, develop concrete action plans, and maintain accountability for real behavioral change. My work isn’t about making people feel better temporarily; it’s about creating lasting transformation through evidence-based tools and honest self-examination.
“People should be able to figure it out themselves” – While self-reliance is admirable, this belief ignores the value of professional guidance and objective perspective. We don’t expect people to perform surgery on themselves or represent themselves in complex legal matters. Personal transformation often requires the same level of specialized support and outside perspective that we readily accept in other areas of life.
The difference between coaching and therapy – Many people don’t understand that coaching is forward-focused on goal achievement and personal development, while therapy typically addresses past trauma and mental health diagnoses. Both are valuable, but coaching specifically helps people move from where they are to where they want to be, using their existing strengths and resources.
These misconceptions miss the fundamental truth: professional coaching provides specialized tools, objective perspective, and accountability that can accelerate personal transformation in ways that going it alone simply cannot achieve.
Can you briefly introduce yourself and share what makes you or your brand unique?
I’m a certified life coach specializing in guiding women through recovery and major life transitions. I’ve been working behind the scenes since my last interview, and while my foundation remains rooted in my personal journey through addiction recovery and cancer survival, I’ve developed a comprehensive approach that goes far beyond traditional coaching.
The BRAVE Recovery Method™ is my new signature framework that I’ve created specifically for women navigating recovery from any life challenge. BRAVE stands for the essential elements of sustainable transformation:
Belief – Develop unshakeable belief in your capacity for lasting recovery
Resilience – developing powerful tools to maintain your recovery through life’s challenges;
Authenticity – reconnecting with your true self through our signature methodology;
Voice – reclaiming your power to express your needs, boundaries, and dreams; and
Empowerment – transforming from surviving to thriving with newfound clarity and purpose.
This method integrates my specialized training in Equus Coaching with evidence-based recovery principles, creating a holistic approach that addresses the whole person, no matter what they’re recovering from.
What sets this work apart is the incorporation of horses as healing partners. Through my certification from The Center for Equus Coaching®, I’ve discovered that horses provide immediate, honest feedback that cuts through the denial and self-deception that often accompanies any recovery journey. They respond to our authentic energy, creating profound moments of self-awareness that accelerate the healing process.
Beyond individual coaching, I’m passionate about changing the conversation around women’s recovery. In addition to writing The BRAVE Recovery Method™. I’ve contributed to three multi-author books, serve as a speaker on recovery topics, and am developing workshops that make The BRAVE Recovery Method™ accessible to more women who need this support.
My practice has evolved from helping women simply survive their challenges to empowering them to transform their struggles into their greatest strengths. That’s the real magic – watching women discover that their deepest wounds often reveal their most powerful gifts.
Appreciate your sharing that. Let’s talk about your life, growing up and some of topics and learnings around that. What did you believe about yourself as a child that you no longer believe?
I was told, and I believed to my core, that I was too sensitive. I was too loud, too dramatic, too much, and I believed I was not nearly enough. Now I believe I’m just right.
Was there ever a time you almost gave up?
Yes. March 13, 2009. I was drunk (again), and in what I now know was a mental health crisis. At the time, I was very emotional and just felt like everyone would be better off without me. I tried to end my life and thankfully failed.
That night became the intersection of desperation and grace that I write about in my books. When I woke up the next morning, sitting on our patio in the aftermath of what I had almost done, I was overwhelmed with shame but also clarity. It became very clear that I could no longer drink safely, and I haven’t had a drink since.
What seemed like my lowest point actually became my greatest gift. That moment of complete surrender opened the door to everything that followed – my recovery, my resilience through cancer, and ultimately my calling to help other women transform their own moments of desperation into grace. Sometimes we have to lose everything to find ourselves.
Alright, so if you are open to it, let’s explore some philosophical questions that touch on your values and worldview. Is the public version of you the real you?
Absolutely. One of the greatest gifts of recovery has been learning to show up authentically, and that includes embracing my naturally salty, sassy personality in my professional work. I’ve discovered that trying to be someone I’m not is exhausting and ultimately ineffective.
The woman you meet in my coaching sessions, see in my speaking engagements, or read about in my writing is the same woman who will drop an F-bomb when describing how hard recovery can be, or who will call out bullshit when I see it. I’ve learned that sanitizing myself to appear more “professional” actually diminishes my ability to connect with the women I serve.
My willingness to be vulnerable publicly – sharing my suicide attempt, my struggles with alcohol, my cancer journey, and even my business mistakes – isn’t just transparency for its own sake. It’s intentional modeling. When I allow myself to be seen in my full humanity, it gives other women permission to do the same.
Recovery taught me that our wounds become our gifts when we stop hiding them. My authenticity isn’t just about being real – it’s about creating safe spaces where other women can drop their masks too. The sassy, no-nonsense woman who’s been through hell and came out stronger? That’s exactly who I am, and that’s exactly who shows up to do this work.
The only difference between my private and public self is that publicly, I’m more intentional about how I channel my authenticity to serve others. But make no mistake – it’s the same woman.
Thank you so much for all of your openness so far. Maybe we can close with a future oriented question. Are you doing what you were born to do—or what you were told to do?
For most of my life, I was absolutely doing what I was told to do. Growing up in a household where children were seen and not heard, I learned early that my worth came from pleasing others and meeting their expectations. This conditioning led me straight into the oil and gas industry – find a good job, stay there, be grateful for the security.
When I was laid off, I was given the opportunity to attend college, free of charge, to learn a new trade, and I chose interior design. Finally, something I actually loved! Something that fed my creativity and felt authentic to who I was. When the economy took a downturn in 2008, it affected my design business, which in turn increased the stress I was under. That combined with the grief and guilt I felt after my father’s death by suicide in 2007, created an almost deadly situation for me. In 2010, after being sober for a year, I was grateful to find a good job back in the oil and gas industry. At the time, it felt like the responsible, practical choice.
Then cancer hit five years later. The irony is that it took sitting in that chemo chair, losing my hair but gaining clarity, to wake me up to the truth: life is too damn short to spend it being miserable just to meet other people’s definitions of success. I realized I had been living someone else’s life for decades, always choosing security over authenticity.
What I’m doing now – coaching women through their own transformations, developing The BRAVE Recovery Method™, working with horses to facilitate healing – this isn’t what I was told to do. This is what I was born to do. Every struggle, every detour, every moment of feeling lost was preparing me for this work.
The difference is profound. Instead of dragging myself to a job that drained my soul, I wake up energized to help women reclaim their power. Instead of seeking external validation, I’m driven by the deep satisfaction of watching women transform their pain into purpose.
I spent years feeding everyone else’s expectations. Now I get to feed my soul while helping other women do the same.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.womenempoweredrecovery.com
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nancymckay/
- My book is available on Amazon: https://a.co/d/cJPfA6N
- I also have a new free eBook: The BRAVE Recovery Starter Guide, which people can request on my website.
Image Credits
Dave Salls
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