ashley Towner of North shore, Oahu, Hawaii on Life, Lessons & Legacy

ashley Towner shared their story and experiences with us recently and you can find our conversation below.

ashley, a huge thanks to you for investing the time to share your wisdom with those who are seeking it. We think it’s so important for us to share stories with our neighbors, friends and community because knowledge multiples when we share with each other. Let’s jump in: What is a normal day like for you right now?
A normal day for me, I try to make the best of everyone…I get up at 5 because it’s the o ly time I’ll be alone, I go for a run or a walk on the beach and jump in the ocean before the kids wake up.
Then I shower, make breakfast and lunch for my 5 year old. Get him and his 2 little brothers up and ready for the day. Give my 15 year old a driving lesson on the way to school drop off. Get to my restaurant by 8 am with the 1 & 2 year old and start breakfast service. I take care of customers, make drinks and cook through lunch.
My 17 year does after school pick up and take the three little cubs to the beach most days to get some energy out. Or we take a hike or find a park. When we go home they ride quads in the yard while I make dinner and my daughter takes care of the horses. It’s a busy simple life.

Can you briefly introduce yourself and share what makes you or your brand unique?
Aloha, I am Ashley Towner.
I am originally from San Diego, California but I’ve been living in Hawaii on the north shore of Oahu for 22 years. I have 5 kids and they are my reason I opened a restaurant, so I could work and bring them with me.
I started a local Hawaiian food restaurant 5 years ago. We offer poke, plate lunch, fresh salads, coffee, kava and more. I’ve networked with local farmers and other small businesses to make a unique spot that supports our islands and gives people a genuine experience.

Thanks for sharing that. Would love to go back in time and hear about how your past might have impacted who you are today. Who were you before the world told you who you had to be?
Before I was told I needed to be strong and different than everyone else I was very care free, shy and hoped to be invisible.
I was artistic and always saving animals. People were drawn to me and told me their secrets.

What have been the defining wounds of your life—and how have you healed them?
The biggest and most defining wound of my life happened when I was 11 years old, my grandmother was kidnapped and murdered. We never caught the person that did it and never got an explanation. This threw me into a rebellion on life and God. Showed me I did not want to cooperate with what I was told to do or believe adults that heroes my head with lies. Through my teenage years I fueled this with modeling and drug abuse. In my early 20s I ran away from America and built orphanages in Thailand and Cambodia and rescued girls in sex trafficking.
I healed myself by living not merely existing. By being brave and honest and never allow my fear to win.

I think our readers would appreciate hearing more about your values and what you think matters in life and career, etc. So our next question is along those lines. Is the public version of you the real you?
Absolutely.
I am a terrible liar and brutally honest. It gets me in trouble sometimes because people don’t like to hear the truth.
I am a hard worker and even harder on my self. I have a justified Italian temper that is hard to control when I see people being bully’s and once I lose your trust, you will never get it back. That’s why I had a hard time working for big corporations, I would give them my all as though their business was my own, and they never reciprocated, they just took and took until I had no more to give. I needed to create a restaurant where everyone felt welcome and the experience was just as much about the food as was the feeling you could dit for hours and forget about the outside world moving to quickly. My motto is to come in and slow down. You can’t rush a good thing and our food is not fast food. I take every customers order personal and I am extremely humbled that they would choose to spend their money here, when they could go anywhere.

Thank you so much for all of your openness so far. Maybe we can close with a future oriented question. What do you understand deeply that most people don’t?
What it means to live. The obsession of work. The passion to grow. The desire to create. The absolute blessing of being a mom. And that raw fish is better than cooked fish. Food grown in your back yard brings more joy than any other. The art of being completely alone with no technology or interruption is amazing

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