Inevitably you will find yourself in a room where no one else is like you. They might not look like you, speak like you, pray or love like you or think like you. Managing to be effective in all contexts is an essential part of your journey towards reaching your full potential and so we asked some brilliant members of the community to share their stories and advice.
Lynn Emery
In most cases, I learned to do my homework if possible. If I go into a business meeting and know the agenda, I research the topics/issues to be discussed. I like to be armed with at least a bit of background knowledge. If I’m the only or one of the few creatives of color in the room (especially an indie now), I lean into reminding myself what I’ve accomplished. I also work hard at avoiding comparing myself. Sayings may become cliche, but that doesn’t mean they’re not true. Comparison really is the thief of joy! Read more>>
Tracyan Martin
Let me start by saying, being the only one in a room can be very daunting. When I got into the industry, I had no clue about the impact of representation or misrepresentation. I was also still fighting through imposter syndrome and being introverted. Now, early on I knew there was a lack of women in music, moreover black female multi-instrumentalists, but it still didn’t click for me. Read more>>
Jevon “Jerzey” Goldson
This question is so complex but very real. There is no simple answer but showing up is half the battle. If you don’t get what you want the first time you learn to adapt, come back and dominate the second time around. As a black man it can be challenging to be taken seriously but showing up consistently will change people’s minds every time. Read more>>
Ellen Story
In order to answer this question, I would like to trade the terms “effectiveness” and “success” with “vitality” and “fulfillment.” Throughout my lifetime, there have been many instances in which it would be easy to doubt myself both personally and professionally, solely based on the fact that I looked and behaved differently from those around me. Read more>>
Marissa Alma Nick
Confidence… And sometimes even indulging in my own delusions of grandeur, for my own benefit. When you aren’t born a white man, it’s inevitable that you’re going to have to swim upstream to earn respect, and to convince anyone to listen to you, about anything other than “mothering,” per say. So I personally think (even channel) some of the women who came before me, all kinds of women… Frida Kahlo, Marie Curie, Joan of Arc, Gloria Steinem, Alice Walker, Oprah and so on… Read more>>
Susan Darrow
I was in a skiing accident as a teenager that resulted in a spinal cord injury. I have used a wheelchair ever since. There is rarely anyone in the room that also uses a wheelchair. Before my injury, I was severely introverted. Afterwards, I realized fading into the background was no longer possible, so I might as well embrace it and move forward. Read more>>
Tony Chang
I love this question because of how loaded it is. One of my biggest strengths is being a major self-competitor. Ever since I was a kid I would always try to not only be the best with my friends or peers but I would be extremely hard on myself. I always ask myself “how can I be better than I was yesterday”? I know this is very cliché mentality but it helps me be effective and motivated with whatever I do. Read more>>
Tiffany Mason
I’ve learned to be effective/successful when I’m the only one in the room that looks like me through values instilled in me by my parents. My family is from an urban area and during the 80s my parents had careers (law enforcement and education) in which they were underrepresented; however, both of them were amazing at what they did and instilled in me to go beyond the basic requirements in all of my endeavors. Read more>>
Janie Desir
The one thing that I love about myself is that I’m a go getter. Plus, I always find different ways to make something work for despite my disability and other issues I may have. What I love the most is how people are so inspired by me and my abilities of getting things done. Read more>>
Tyrike Brown
When I am in the community selling my products at small local vending events, I am often the only black man among the other vendors. As a black man who makes poetry-themed wellness products from plants that I grow at a farm, I make a point to mention the things that make my business unique and interesting to people of all backgrounds. Read more>>
Karen Freidt
Interestingly, I love being the only one in a room who looks like me because the challenge offers many growth opportunities for myself and others. One of the first times I remember looking physically different was in elementary school when I was the only little pale white child in the classroom. It was in 1971 when they started forced desegregation busing, and children were sent to different schools in the South that were previously segregated. Read more>>
Ran Wang
In my previous position, I joined a medium-sized post-production company. Initially, there was another visual effects artist to assist me in getting started. However, after just one week, the other artist resigned, leaving me as the sole visual effects artist. I found myself in a unique position, not only as an artist but also as my own manager/supervisor. It proved to be both a challenging and rewarding experience. Read more>>
Jansen Azarias-Suzumoto
When I first started at Higher Ground, I was a 20-year-old, foreign-born Asian-American with a thick accent, stepping into a predominantly Hispanic and white industry in Arizona. My field was education, social work, and mental health, yet I was a college dropout with a background in computer science. Read more>>
Becca Ferguson
Growing up, I dealt with my fair share of bullying. It wasn’t just about trying to figure out who I was; I also had this constant urge to please everyone around me. But it wasn’t just typical schoolyard teasing; it went beyond that. I faced some serious abuse and got tangled up in those high-power, control-freak kind of relationships. Read more>>
Evaluz Negron Pickering
This particular question hits home for me. I often have found myself situations where I’m the only one in the room that looks like me. I grew up in an inner city area and loved going to school. School was always an escape for me and I soon found myself in Honors/Advanced Placement courses from Junior High to High School. Read more>>
Troi Brown
I’ve learned to just believe in myself. Know that I belong regardless of what my surroundings look like. Whether they think I deserve to be here or not, I’m here. I’m extremely humble yet so confident in my craft. I may not be the best but I thrive in everything I set my mind to. There’s no giving up, no quitting, no starting over, I’m in the midst of greatness, really following my true passion of life. This is what I set out to do and there will be nothing but illustriousness to follow. Read more>>
Glenn Hattem
Being curious enough about my clients to love up on the parts of them they’re hyper-critical about so thy can heal and believe in their dreams that they want to realize is essential. I ask questions and give healthy feedback to demonstrate that I understand WHY they are stuck currently, so we can work together to improve things. Read more>>
Danielle Connolly
Having a disability since birth, I was often the only one in the room with an apparent disability. It was tricky, because if I was just sitting in a chair, you wouldn’t be able to know that I am disabled. When I get out of a chair slowly, or walk with my limp, my disability instantly becomes apparent. Growing up and dealing with awkward or negative reactions to the disclosure or reveal of my disability did a toll on my confidence. Read more>>
Tamika Hill
I know a lot about being the only one in the room because I’m the only girl out 5 siblings. In addition to being the only granddaughter and niece in my family. So, as you can see since the day I was born being differently. Over the years navigating a space where I can stand out has come natural to me. It also has presented opportunities to showcase my individuality and strengths. Read more>>
Naveed Ahmed
As a Bangladeshi American musician who grew up low-income in NYC, I’ve always been and continue to be in spaces where I’m the only one in the room that looks like me or comes from a background like mine. It honestly wasn’t until my early adult years when I really stepped outside the New York City bubble that I realized what a minority I really was. Read more>>
Margrit Erika Tendencia
I’ve been a Freelance Home-based Online English Teacher for 16 years prior to becoming a yoga and pilates coach. During the early phase of my teaching career, I worked on my own trying to survive with student referrals which motivated me to further develop my skills. Read more>>
Randall Cole
I believe that being the only one that looks like you IS the most effective outcome and the most important thing that you can do for yourself. Uniqueness will always stand out as the most true method that someone can show their character. Read more>>
Samya Mohamed
I’ve never been one to want to fit in or look like anyone. I enjoy being the only person in the room who looks and operates the way I do. I’ve learned to not be afraid to be your authentic self from within. You will always attract the energy in the room when you are confident and content with yourself first. If you want to be successful and effective, it’s important to have a clear goal and a solid plan to achieve it. Read more>>
Prince Gautier MASKOTT
The only reason that obliges me to be efficient in my work even when alone are faith, perseverance and determination these 3 elements are the ingredients for success. Read more>>
Chayla C. Jackson, Esq.
When I was in law school, I remember feeling misplaced and questioning whether I belonged in my seat in the classroom. This was in spite of the countless hours and years I devoted to prepare for law school upon deciding on my post-college plans after my freshmen year of college. I still remember feeling judged by a white male student questioning me about my LSAT score as if I had not earned my seat right beside him. Read more>>
