Inevitably you will find yourself in a room where no one else is like you. They might not look like you, speak like you, pray or love like you or think like you. Managing to be effective in all contexts is an essential part of your journey towards reaching your full potential and so we asked some brilliant members of the community to share their stories and advice.
Kaiya Montague
I’ve learned that just being confident in who you are is most important. It sounds cliche but you should walk into every room like you own it. When you are authentic to yourself and who God called you to be then you’ll always be effective in life. Read more>>
Zochu Liu
In my role as a game audio sound designer, being the only one in the room who looks like me has been an opportunity for growth and learning. I’ve learned to be effective and successful by focusing on my strengths and unique perspective. My classical music background provides a distinct edge in creating rich, immersive soundscapes that enhance the gaming experience. I’ve also made it a priority to actively listen, collaborate, and communicate effectively with my teammates to ensure that my contributions are both valued and understood. Read more>>
Jules Bowman
As a multiracial woman, I’m usually the only one in the room who looks like me, but for most of my life, my race wasn’t something I paid much attention to. It wasn’t until I became a mother that I started to see the importance of identity in a clearer light. Watching my son navigate his own minority upbringing made me more aware of the complexities and nuances that come with it. Read more>>
Jasmine Pablo
As a Black woman in HR, I’m proud to see that we now have a seat at the table – a space that wasn’t always open to us. I’m encouraged by the progress, as I’ve started seeing more people who look like me in professional spaces, creating a sense of community and representation that has long been missing. Yet, there are still moments when I find myself as the only one in the room who looks like me. In those instances, I take a strategic approach by first listening, which allows me to gauge who’s in the room and understand the variety of perspectives at play. Read more>>
Jakob Hennekam
There’s been a lot of times where I’m the only person in the room who looks or acts like I do- it’s kind of something I’ve gotten used to by this point. I grew up in a small town in Indiana and a lot of the time, I felt like I was on the outside looking in, or like everyone else had been given some kind of guidebook and I was the only one who didn’t get one. Even now that I’ve found communities of people like me where I feel welcomed and have similar experiences to other people, there’s still times where I feel like maybe I’m just a little too odd, a little too out there, a little too weird. The biggest thing that’s gotten me through it is that at our core, we are all human. Read more>>
Danika Frandsen
Passion. Having a true passion for what I am doing, and believing in the power to change lives has helped me move forward, even when there did not seem to be a path already forged. Read more>>
Bella Blue
I believe that there is something unique and special about each person. We may not always agree or see eye to eye — but I see my role as a human being is to see the good in others and work from there. I (try to) assume the best until that person shows me otherwise. I have found that the best way to approach someone is with open arms and a smile — ready to receive and welcome. And again, entering that space knowing that there’s always a chance that the other person could just downright be a terrible person. And that’s ok. But — they might be an amazing person and I will never get to know that if I don’t have the space to consider the best in them. Read more>>
Pam Montgomery-fittz, Dvm
In my work, I am a perpetual 2-year-old – “why? why? why?” I am curious about everything. When I became a veterinarian 30 years ago and came up against the ole mindset of “oh, that just happens,” it didn’t sit well with me. In my work, disease doesn’t just happen, it’s curated. When I see a patient with X disease, I want to know how we got there. Certainly we can manage diseases, but what if we could catch it and correct it when it is the early state of simple dysfunction avoiding the disease entirely? All disease has to start somewhere, so why not go back to the beginning, derail the disease-forming process and create a healthier, longer life? Read more>>
Kay Dolores
When I was in Catholic school, I first learned that my being the only one like me meant I was unwelcome, that I was dirty, that I wasn’t like the others, and would most likely burn forever in hell. That’s pretty unpleasant, until you understand that you can take aaaaaalll that hatred and turn it into your strength—strength to create your own world through art, strength to build your own community, strength to inspire others who also feel alone and rejected, and strength of course to leave your detractors in your dust, without ever lifting a finger against them. Read more>>
Allison Lau
I really appreciate this question because it is something where you never really know how it will affect you until you’re faced with the situation and it really has the ability to shape your identity and personal philosophy. This has been a theme that has come up countless times over my career in journalism and there have been many story assignments where I was the only woman or person of color in the field, working on a crew of all men or assigned a story that placed me in a community that had a completely different experience than my own. While it can be intimidating entering a space where the initial focus may be on the blatant differences that set you apart, I’ve learned two very important things. Read more>>
Tiffany Mercer-robbins
Being the only one in the room that looks like me has been a recurring experience throughout my career, especially as a Black creative. Early on, I learned the importance of advocating for myself and staying true to my vision, even when my presence wasn’t expected or always welcomed. It took time, but I realized that my unique perspective wasn’t a limitation but a strength. My experiences, culture, and the challenges I’ve faced provide insight into creating authentic, culture-centric work that resonates with underrepresented audiences. Read more>>
Alyssa Stencavage
I am passionate and speak with authority and poise. I am super silly and sassy, but I know when it’s time to be serious. I want to be remembered positively and respectfully. It also helps that I’m tall. 😉 Read more>>
Laurie Okamoto
Growing up, my family was the only Asian family in a Caucasian town. It was often uncomfortable to feel eyes on us because even if they weren’t malicious stares, I just wanted to fly under the radar like most others in the town did. Eventually, I came to realize that their curiosity, while uncomfortable, wasn’t a negative thing. My classmates still included me, I was still able to make friends, and eventually I grew to ignore those who felt a need to stare. Once I understood that I wouldn’t be ostracized for my appearance, I became comfortable in my own skin and found that I was more willing to try new things and ideas. Read more>>
Yan Jiang
I believe that the definition of success is in my own hands. To me, success is deeply personal and can only be measured by how much I grow compared to my past self. It’s important to always compare myself to who I was yesterday, observe my emotions, and take the time to understand myself better. I find value in following a routine that helps me learn something new every day, which allows me to continuously improve and evolve. This daily investment in my own growth keeps me grounded and ensures that I’m always working towards becoming the best version of myself. Read more>>
Nikki Dunlap
Navigating spaces where I am the only one who looks like me has taught me to embrace my unique identity and story as my greatest strengths. From my time in the Navy to my journey as a music producer and software developer, I’ve learned to turn my diverse experiences into assets. Being both a creative and a tech professional allows me to see problems from different angles, blending artistry with technical precision. Read more>>
Chetachi Egwu Ph.d.
I grew up often being the only person of African parentage in many spaces, and sometimes the only person of African descent in general. As such, being the “only” has never bothered me; and I’ve learned that if it bothers other people, it is simply not my problem. For me, it is important to take the opportunities of being the only one like me in a space by learning from others that are not like me. I believe that true learning occurs when you exit your comfort zone, and what you know, and enter the realm of the “unknown”. Read more>>
Olga Munding
For as long as I can remember, I was the only one in the room with the name Olga growing up in the San Francisco Bay Area. My parents were from another country and still carried their cultural traditions to the United States. My first language was German, and I had a very distinct and unusual name, which already set me apart. Read more>>
Crystal Petry
One of the first ways I have learned to be effective and successful in those rooms, is understanding that I deserve to be in every one I walk into. The space I occupy was not given to me, I earned it! Read more>>
Selania King
In many of the professional environments I’ve worked in, I’ve often found myself being the only one who looks like me. There’s never been a time when I haven’t had to prove my worth more than others. At first, it felt isolating, but I quickly realized that, given the body I have and the color I have, I can’t afford to make excuses. I’ve learned to live with a mindset of excelling regardless of the circumstances. Read more>>
Oscar Roberts
I’m used to being the only one in the room in my mental capacity and skill set. It’s deeper than race and gender. I’ve had to really rise above adversity and challenges that have allowed me to turn into a true mogul & leader because I’ve been in many positions where I had to follow and adjust myself to fit into an ongoing business or movement. Now I also see why many people because very successful at my age due to trial & error. Read more>>
Renay bossy Graham
We’ll….. Here we go. I am Renay AKA bossy I’m a licensed cosmetologist &brand owner. which covers my salon &products that all fall underneath the same name Hikey ya gorgeous LLC SALON ™. This is an interesting question. I am a unicorn meaning I’m a brown girl, that does amazing vanilla hair. I know you probably looked at my website www.hikeyyagorgeousllc.com plug 🔌 and you would think that it was a vanilla salon. Most people think that . then when they show up & see me. Read more>>
Jedidiah U. Peters
My life journey first as Tito Da Fire the Rapper (that’s what I did in “Seun Rere” the first single ever”, then the singer, the Radio, TV host, the copy writer, the screen-writer for a BBC produced TV series, the voice over on global advert campaigns, writing music for myself and others, all of these are parts of being the only one in the room, because looking back at having released my first single with Gent2Men in 2002, and consistently releasing music almost every year, that fans and listeners from all spheres of life describe as relevant”, is such an honor, although I wish more artistes who were popping at that time were still doing same with similar energy today. Read more>>
