Dr. Carmen Bell-Ross shared their story and experiences with us recently and you can find our conversation below.
Hi Carmen, thank you for taking the time to reflect back on your journey with us. I think our readers are in for a real treat. There is so much we can all learn from each other and so thank you again for opening up with us. Let’s get into it: What do the first 90 minutes of your day look like?
These days, my mornings start before my feet ever hit the floor. I grab my devotional, Jesus Calling, and I sit with it for a few minutes. It centers me in a way that nothing else does. I pray, I talk to God and I intentionally thank Him for everything, even the things that don’t feel positive in the moment.
So if I’ve gained a little weight? I thank God that my body is healthy and that I have a gym membership and the ability to do something about it. If an unexpected bill pops up? I’m grateful that I have the resources to cover it. That mindset shift has been powerful. It turns what could easily become stress into clarity.
By the time I get out of bed, I already feel strong, grounded, and ready to face the world. It’s a simple ritual, but it has completely changed how I move into my day. I am more present, more grateful, and more aligned with what matters.
Can you briefly introduce yourself and share what makes you or your brand unique?
I’m Dr. Carmen Bell-Ross, the CEO of SP Grace and the creator of The College Smarter™ Method. At my core, I’m someone who believes people deserve to feel powerful, prepared, and seen—whether they’re leading a team, serving their community, or stepping into the next chapter of their lives.
SP Grace is the company organizations call when their leaders need support navigating the “people” side of work—the relationships, communication, culture, and performance challenges that can make or break a team. We do capacity-building, leadership development, and workforce training for nonprofits, corporations, and government agencies. What makes our work special is that it’s deeply human. We don’t treat leadership like theory; we treat it like real people trying to do meaningful work, sometimes under real pressure. And we help them do it with confidence and clarity.
The College Smarter™ Method grew out of that same purpose but in a completely different lane—helping young people step into life-changing opportunities with strategy, clarity, and a sense of who they are.
Over the last 20 years, I’ve spoken to thousands of students across the country, listening to their hopes, anxieties, and questions as they navigate the transition from high school to college. At the same time, my professional career has been spent inside organizations—watching what leaders look for, how people rise, and what actually sets someone apart once the credentials fade into the background. Those two worlds came together and became the foundation for The College Smarter™ Method.
And of course, my daughter Ciera was my first “test case.” I started building a strategic approach for her when she was five—long before I ever imagined I’d turn it into something bigger. Watching her journey and refining the method through her experience helped me realize there was a smarter, more humane way to guide families who were already doing everything right, but still felt overwhelmed by the college admissions frenzy.
College Smarter™ is a premium strategy layer that sits above traditional tutoring, test prep, and college counseling.
We build a personalized strategic playbook for each student—something that aligns their strengths, identity, goals, and activities into a clear position that helps them stand out in an extraordinary, unforgettable way. It prepares them not only to get into competitive programs, but to thrive once they get there and launch into their careers with purpose.
This work excites me because it gives families their time back, reduces stress, and helps students show up in the world not just impressive on paper, but deeply grounded in who they are. It’s about helping them walk into college confident, prepared, and ready for whatever comes next.
Appreciate your sharing that. Let’s talk about your life, growing up and some of topics and learnings around that. Who were you before the world told you who you had to be?
Honestly, I was the little girl who loved the celebration of life. I’ve always been that person who could see joy in moments and then immediately start planning how to make them even more special. Long before I ever had a business or a brand, I was an architect of experiences — learning experiences, bonding experiences, celebratory moments… anything that brought people together.
When I was young, I used to get so excited when the JCPenney catalog showed up. Most kids were looking at toys; I went straight to the wedding and bridal section. I collected bridal magazines like other kids collected stickers. I planned weddings — imaginary ones, my own future wedding, weddings for people I’d made up in my head. It was natural to me.
And I planned my first real “special event” at eight years old. I turned our living room into a venue I named The Northern Inn to celebrate my parents’ birthdays and anniversary. I recruited my younger brothers, dressed them up in their church clothes (black pants, white button-down shirts) and designated them as the waitstaff.
I lived in that Make and Do book from the Childcraft encyclopedia set. I made a turtle piñata because it was the only one I had materials for, filled it with goodies, and created hand-drawn decorations for the walls. I even made a robot-shaped cake, because the book showed you how to build one using rectangle, square, and circle-shaped baking pans. It was perfect for an eight-year-old with big vision and limited culinary skills!
And because I was serious about my little event production, I made menus on my mom’s Apple IIe computer…that green-text-on-black-screen era. I remember feeling like I was running a whole establishment.
What’s funny is that I’m still that girl. Planning special moments is still my therapy. Whether it’s a sisterhood retreat, a graduation celebration, or a birthday that needs to feel like magic. It’s where I come alive. I was born to create moments that make people feel something.
Before the world told me who I had to be, I was already doing what I do now… just with glue, construction paper, and a very patient family.
What have been the defining wounds of your life—and how have you healed them?
One of the biggest wounds of my life was definitely my divorce. Ciera was an infant, and I never imagined myself becoming a single mother. I grew up in a home that felt like The Huxtables…joyful, respectful, loving. My parents modeled what partnership and family should look like, and I fully expected to recreate that same foundation for my daughter. When that didn’t happen, I felt like I had failed her and failed myself.
The truth, though, is that staying would have been far more damaging. It just wasn’t healthy for me and that was obvious. But knowing that and accepting that were two very different things. It took years of therapy, self-reflection, and a lot of inner work to extend enough grace to myself to see my divorce not as a flaw in my story, but as a chapter that shaped me into the woman I actually love being today.
So much of how I support others now comes directly from having lived through that experience. I have the ability to be genuinely empathetic and sit with people in their hard moments and understand pain and still see possibility. The experience of divorce softened me in some ways and strengthened me in others.
And my faith… my faith carried me. It still does. I believe with my whole heart that all things work together for good. Not that all things feel good. Not that all things are good. But that somehow, they are woven together in a way that leads to purpose. That belief helps me accept things that are painful, challenging, or even humiliating, and still know: this is part of something bigger.
I say all the time that everything that happens to you and through you isn’t always about you. Sometimes you’re being shaped so you can help someone else. Sometimes you’re being prepared for the life you’re meant to lead.
That perspective has helped me heal and it keeps me grounded in the truth that all is well, even when it doesn’t look like it in the moment.
I think our readers would appreciate hearing more about your values and what you think matters in life and career, etc. So our next question is along those lines. Is the public version of you the real you?
For a long time, I thought I needed different versions of myself—one for work, one for home, one for church, one for friends. I used to code-switch because I believed that was the only way to move through the world successfully. And to be clear, there are things that are appropriate to share in one setting and not in another, so I’m not pretending that context doesn’t matter.
But as I’ve gotten older, I’ve learned that I don’t need to “become” a different person. I can just be myself, authentically and consistently, with some thoughtful guardrails depending on the environment. What I don’t believe in is using “I’m just being real” as an excuse to hurt people or say whatever we want without regard for impact. That’s not authenticity; that’s irresponsibility.
For me, authenticity means I’m bringing the same heart, the same values, the same spirit everywhere I go… but I’m choosing the version that fits the moment. If I need to uplift and encourage someone on my team, I don’t have to pretend. I can always find something sincere and constructive to say. If I need to offer hard feedback, I can do that in a way that’s still respectful and rooted in care. That’s a skill I’m grateful for and one I help others develop too.
And to keep it real: yes, when I’m with my friends, I might tell a story with a little profanity because I’m a work in progress. But in a professional environment or with people who would find that language offensive, I can tell the exact same story in a way that everyone can receive. Same story, same humor, same authenticity… different delivery.
Even with my faith, which is such a deep part of who I am, I understand that not every setting calls for explicit scripture. But the principles of grace, integrity, compassion, and wisdom translate everywhere. I can share the essence of what I believe without alienating people who may not share my background.
So yes, the public version of me is absolutely the real me. It’s just the version that’s right for the room. And I love the place I’m in now, where I no longer feel the need to fragment myself. I get to show up as one whole, grounded, authentic woman…just expressed differently depending on the moment.
Thank you so much for all of your openness so far. Maybe we can close with a future oriented question. Could you give everything your best, even if no one ever praised you for it?
Absolutely. In many ways, that has been the story of my entire career. It’s not that I never had people who believed in me. My parents, family, and close friends have always spoken life into me. But for a long time, I didn’t feel fully seen or valued in the spaces where I was working the hardest. I was the background player. The one quietly making magic happen behind the scenes while other people received the spotlight.
I watched people I had poured into soar to incredible heights with their careers taking off, confidence rising, and opportunities opening. I was genuinely happy for them. But there was also a quiet part of me that wished someone would look at my work and simply say, “Well done.” I felt guilty for wanting that acknowledgment, but I’m human. We all want to feel seen.
To make it harder, I had a few “frenemies” who were always ready to politely highlight my shortcomings. Those voices were loud, especially during a time when I was already feeling insecure. It made me double down and work even harder, not to prove anything to them, but to prove something to myself… that the person I believed I could be on the inside was real, even if no one else recognized it yet.
And honestly, I don’t think people truly started to acknowledge my gifts publicly until I became “Dr. Carmen.” But here’s the truth: the biggest shift wasn’t the degree. It was how I felt about myself. I started telling myself a better story about who I was and what I was capable of, and that confidence changed how I carried myself.
Would I have worked this hard if I had always seen myself the way I do now? Maybe not. But everything happens for a reason. Those years of feeling unseen built a strength and empathy in me that I now use to help others step into their own fullness.
So yes, I can give my best with no applause. I’ve done it for years. But now I also give myself the recognition I used to wait for from others. And that has made all the difference.
Contact Info:
- Website: SP Grace.com and CollegeSmarter.com
- Other: Two website domains: SP Grace.com and CollegeSmarter.com
Image Credits
Photo credit: Nicole Ashley Allen Photography
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