Kyla Cook on Choosing Purpose Over Performance

After navigating public conflict and personal recalibration, Kyla Cook has emerged with a leadership philosophy rooted in clarity, boundaries, and intention. Through her podcast You Don’t Even Know! and her work with Closed Spaces Inc., she’s building platforms that prioritize honesty over optics and depth over noise. This next chapter is about protecting peace, creating with conviction, and cultivating safe, thoughtfully structured spaces where real stories can be shared — and truly held.

Kyla, your story about persistence in the face of online conflict is powerful and deeply relatable. How did that experience reshape the way you approach leadership, creativity, and boundaries today?
That season forced me to grow up as a leader in real time. When conflict becomes public, you learn quickly what you actually stand on — not the curated version of yourself, but the grounded one. I had to redefine leadership as something rooted in clarity, not performance. I became more intentional about how I show up, what I respond to, and what I refuse to carry.

Creatively, it pushed me toward deeper honesty. I stopped creating from a place of proving and started creating from a place of purpose. And when it comes to boundaries, I learned that protecting my peace isn’t selfish — it’s stewardship. I can’t lead well or create well if I’m constantly leaking energy into conflict that doesn’t align with my values.

Launching a podcast is a major undertaking — and you’ve built You Don’t Even Know! into such a thoughtful, community-driven platform. What inspired the show’s original mission, and how has that mission evolved through everything you’ve experienced?
The show started as a space to tell the stories people usually keep to themselves — the messy, human, in‑between moments that shape who we are. I wanted listeners to feel less alone and more understood, even if they didn’t have the language for what they were going through.

As life happened — especially the conflict I walked through — the mission expanded. It became less about storytelling for entertainment and more about storytelling for healing, clarity, and community. Now the show is a place where people can learn, reflect, and feel seen, but also walk away with tools they can use in their own lives.

You’ve talked about choosing “purpose over performance.” What does that look like for you day-to-day as both a creator and a leader?
It means I check my intentions before I check my metrics. I ask myself: Is this aligned? Is this honest? Is this necessary? If the answer is no, I don’t force it.

Practically, it looks like:

Creating at a sustainable pace instead of a performative one
Saying no without guilt
Letting quality matter more than quantity
Leading from conviction instead of optics
And finally, Episodes to come

Purpose over performance keeps me grounded. It reminds me that my value isn’t tied to output — it’s tied to impact.

You’ve turned a really painful chapter into a framework others can learn from — from documenting to setting guardrails and protecting your peace. What advice would you give to other creatives navigating public or professional conflicts?
Document everything. Not from a place of paranoia, but from a place of clarity. When emotions run high, facts matter.

Second, set guardrails early. Decide what you will and won’t engage with, and stick to it. Not every accusation deserves your energy, and not every narrative needs your participation.

Most importantly, protect your peace. Conflict can make you feel like you have to defend yourself nonstop, but sometimes the most powerful response is choosing not to be pulled into chaos. Surround yourself with people who know your character, and let their clarity anchor you.

Your platform blends heart and structure — from podcast episodes to educational tools and collaborations through Closed Spaces Inc. How do you balance the creative storytelling side with the systems and structure that keep everything running smoothly?
I’ve learned that creativity without structure burns out, and structure without creativity becomes rigid. So I treat them as partners, not opposites.

Storytelling is where the heart lives — the connection, the vulnerability, the imagination. Systems are what make that heart sustainable. I build frameworks, workflows, and boundaries that protect the creative process instead of suffocating it. Closed Spaces Inc. is really the intersection of both: intentional storytelling supported by intentional infrastructure.

The updates to your site and the growth of You Don’t Even Know! sound exciting. What can listeners expect next — from the interactive features, merch, or new collaborations you’re working on?
This next phase is all about deeper connection and more intentional engagement. Listeners can expect:

Interactive features that let the audience participate in conversations, not just consume them
New merch that reflects the themes of the show — identity, clarity, and community
Collaborations with creators and educators who align with the mission of safe, honest storytelling

Everything we’re building is designed to make the platform feel more like a community and less like a broadcast.

At its core, your work is about creating safe, intentional spaces for people to be real. What does that look like in this next season for you — both personally and through your creative platforms?
Personally, it looks like choosing environments that honor my peace and relationships that honor my growth. I’m prioritizing rest, clarity, and alignment in a way I didn’t always give myself permission to before.

Creatively, it means continuing to build platforms where people can be real without being exploited. Spaces where nuance is allowed, where healing is encouraged, and where honesty isn’t punished. This next season is about depth — deeper conversations, deeper community, and deeper purpose.

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