Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Alexa Martinez. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.
Alexa, we can’t begin to explain how much we appreciate you sharing about your PPD experience, but we can say that so many in our community are suffering from or have suffered from postpartum issues including postpartum depression and so you sharing your story and how you overcame it might help someone who is going through it right now or in the future. What can you share with us about how you overcame PPD? For readers, please note this is not medical advice, we are not doctors, you should always consult professionals for advice and that this is merely one person sharing their story and experience.
Postpartum Depression absolutely rocked my world. It’s something you’re never prepared for, and don’t see coming. It’s not fun to talk about, so it’s usually just not. It’s easy to skip over, much easier to talk about cute newborn snuggles!
When Postpartum Depression showed up for me soon after having my son, it changed everything I thought motherhood would be. I couldn’t bond with my son, and felt like he was a stranger to me. I felt like the worst mother in the world- surely I was alone in feeling this way, right?!
As time passed, and things were getting worse instead of getting better, I reached out to my OBGYN. In one of my follow up appointments, I started bawling in her office and telling her that I was struggling so immensely to feel like a basic human, let alone a mother bonding with her newborn. I will never forget her holding my hands and telling me that it would be strange if I WASN’T crying right now. After all, I had a colicky newborn, traumatic pregnancy and birth and postpartum period, and then to top it all off I hadn’t slept in weeks.
Hearing that it was normal to feel the way that I was feeling was so comforting, and felt like permission to start asking for help. I ended up being prescribed medication, and a little bit later I began therapy. Those two things, combined with time, started may healing process. However, it’s been a journey with lots of ups and downs- I never want a mother to hear “Oh, she just started medication and therapy and everything is all better now!” because that’s just not my reality, and isn’t for many other women either. I’ve found that having a strong support system, asking for help when I need it, and relying on my faith to carry me have all had a huge impact on my healing from Postpartum Depression and Anxiety, as well. I was able to bond with my son, and now have an incredible relationship with him. I feel more and more like myself every day…but I never want a new mom to look at where I am now and feel defeated, or like it was a quick easy fix. For some it may be…but for others, like me, it is something I will probably always be navigating and getting a little bit better every day.
If you’re a new mama feeling like your experience with motherhood is out of the norm, or like you are drowning, I encourage you to just take the first step and ask for help! Whether that be from a friend, your spouse, hiring help, a therapist, or your doctor. Just telling someone that you need help, and asking for what you really need, can be such a helpful first step! You WILL heal, but everyone’s healing journey looks a little bit different.
So, when a new mom asks me how I overcame Postpartum Depression and Postpartum Anxiety, I tell her….time. It just takes time. And I am here with her every step of the way.
Thanks for sharing that. So, before we get any further into our conversation, can you tell our readers a bit about yourself and what you’re working on?
After struggling with my son’s sleep for 6 months after he was born, I finally hired a sleep consultant who helped us walk through his sleep issues and get him sleeping through the night. This absolutely changed our lives, and helped with my mental health tremendously! My son was much happier, as he was getting the rest he needed, and our home just felt more peaceful and functional. I was able to show up as the mama and wife I wanted to be, and able to take care of myself as well.
In 2021, I decided to get my certification in pediatric sleep consulting, so that I could help other mamas get their lives and mental health back as well! I now offer one on one completely customized sleep plans, and work with parents all over the country on getting their babies and toddlers to sleep in a way that feels comfortable for them. I love what I do, and seeing mamas lives change once they are all sleeping will never get old!
You can check out my one on one plans here: mamamatterstoo.com/services, or sign up for a 15 minute free discovery call with me here: https://calendly.com/mamamatterstoo/free-15-minute-consultation.
Please also feel free to download my free ebook on conquering your child’s sleep (and your anxiety!) here: https://view.flodesk.com/pages/64daa68c8457bad1915890c5
There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?
The first thing that was the most helpful was reaching out for support. Telling others I needed help was the first, most impactful step I took to healing.
Second was the tools I have used, namely medication and therapy. Medication was a good starting point at regulating my postpartum emotions, but therapy has helped immensely with continuing to work through things and find true, down the the roots healing.
Third was finding the joy in the mundane. Looking for joy, instead of seeking the negative, has been incredibly helpful in my day to day mindset as a mama!
If you are in a place of depression and anxiety, I encourage you to just start with step one. Reach out to a trusted friend, your partner, or your doctor and start getting a treatment plan. No one can help you if they don’t know you’re struggling!
Before we go, any advice you can share with people who are feeling overwhelmed?
When I feel overwhelmed as a mom, it is so easy to start spinning out of control and let the overwhelm dictate my entire day. I like to try to grab the thoughts of overwhelm before they take root in my brain and start spinning, and do something about it. Taking action is the best way I have found to stop the feeling of being overwhelmed. If noise or overstimulation is overwhelming me, that looks like shutting myself in a room by myself for 5 minutes to just focus on nothing but deep breaths and saying a quick prayer. Some days, the clutter is overwhelming me, so I set a timer for 15 minutes on my phone and do as much tidying or quick cleaning as I can in that time. Just getting started is a huge motivator for me, and usually feeds into more small habits throughout my day!
Contact Info:
- Website: https://mamamatterstoo.com
- Instagram: https://instragm.com/mama.matters.too
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/mamamatterstoo/
- Other: Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mama-matters-too-sleep-training-solutions-for-overwhelmed/id1732963842
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