Meet Allison Bradsher

We were lucky to catch up with Allison Bradsher recently and have shared our conversation below.

Allison , we’re so excited for our community to get to know you and learn from your journey and the wisdom you’ve acquired over time. Let’s kick things off with a discussion on self-confidence and self-esteem. How did you develop yours?

Self discovery has been a huge part of my self-esteem. Knowing, naming, and accepting my wiring, my personality, and my story have helped me to embrace that all of it belongs. There are parts of myself I have always liked: my imagination, my competitive drive, my ability to make friends, but there are other parts that I have needed to also allow to be true: my introvertedness, the time I need to ponder something before I know how to respond, the analytical eye I bring to circumstances. In learning that I am sensitive, that I am quiet, that I need big pockets of time alone, I have grown in seeing those as gifts when they have sometimes felt like burdens. When I let myself be myself and let others be themselves, that is when I am most free and confident and can allow others the same worth.

Thanks for sharing that. So, before we get any further into our conversation, can you tell our readers a bit about yourself and what you’re working on?

I am part of an exciting, new venture in Memphis called The Retreat House. We are actually situated right outside of Memphis on 10 acres in Eads. This is purposeful as we want to be a place where people can step away from the noise and distractions of life to just be. We believe God’s love and presence are the truest, best things in life, and that we need ways to engage with that in the quiet. We offer retreats, cabin stays, and sessions of counseling, coaching, and spiritual direction, as ways to invite Memphians to slow down and pay attention to the inner life and potentially heal from the inside out.

There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?

Three skills or qualities that I think have been essential for this journey are listening, speaking up, and trusting the process. The first two may seem like opposites, but I have needed both along the way. Listening is a huge part of my work in spiritual direction. I am listening for what someone is saying, what they are not saying, even what their tears might want to say. Listening involves being incredibly present and available to the moment, not interrupting, offering safe, compassionate space, and asking questions rather than giving answers. This part of my session work has changed me as a person and impacts how I show up in any conversation that I am having. It affects everything from relationships with co-workers to conversations with donors. I have heard said the being listened to is pretty close to being loved. We all need that. Then speaking up is sort of the other side of the coin. When you work with others in a job or even in your home, it is important, at least for me, not to minimize my thoughts, ideas, or needs. I have learned that I am my biggest advocate, and it doesn’t do anyone any favors for me to pretend I don’t have needs or thoughts. I have learned to bring my perspective and my value without fear or shame. That is no small thing for me, especially if it risks conflict. I have learned I can survive conflict and be ok. I can even feel proud of myself in the midst, and that has been empowering. Lastly, trusting the process. With anything in life, when you zoom in and look at one aspect, one day, one hurdle, things can seem bleak. Challenges can make a person want to give up. Zooming out has been incredibly important. Zooming out allows me to see something bigger unfolding. More than the work itself, I am unfolding. I am becoming a certain someone, and that perspective allows me to trust the process. For me I have deeply experienced that that process is held by God. In God I live and move and have my being. That gives me the hope needed to stay with the journey.

Awesome, really appreciate you opening up with us today and before we close maybe you can share a book recommendation with us. Has there been a book that’s been impactful in your growth and development?

A book that has impacted and shaped me in ways I will never forget is Sacred Rhythms by Ruth Haley Barton. This book is based in the Christian faith. I know many of us have complicated relationships with faith and religion, but one thing that I think is universal is that we all need rhythms that support us to live in ways that are life giving and fulfilling. For me that is a life with God. This book has helped me to learn and anchor in practices that have enriched my life in the deepest ways. I have read it multiple times and led groups based on its chapters. I love it and am grateful for her wisdom.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.theretreathousememphis.com
• Instagram: @theretreathousememphis