Meet Allison Martinek

We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Allison Martinek a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.

Allison, so great to have you with us and we want to jump right into a really important question. In recent years, it’s become so clear that we’re living through a time where so many folks are lacking self-confidence and self-esteem. So, we’d love to hear about your journey and how you developed your self-confidence and self-esteem.

It’s taken me a long time to get to a point where I can say that I am confident in my abilities as an artist and who I am as a person. It’s something that I had to build up over time and make small strides toward.

Growing up, my confidence was non-existent, and my self-esteem was timid at best. In fact, I hated myself for a long time. I hated the way I looked. I hated dealing with multiple chronic conditions. I hated that no matter what, I always felt out of place.

I would say that initially, I started building confidence through my photography. Since I was little, I always loved running around with disposable film cameras and taking pictures of random things. I began to learn and dedicate more time to photography, and it quickly became a passion of mine. My skills and talents were progressing, and I eventually felt like I could hold my own in competitions and among my fellow photographers. During this time, it was easier for me to put all my effort into my work and hide behind it. I was confident in the work, but I wasn’t confident in me.

The self-confidence took much longer to build. I have been plus-size my entire life. I have never fit societal beauty standards in Western culture. This resulted in unwarranted, negative comments about my body and health, even as a child. I was taught to be ashamed of myself and that I wasn’t deserving of respect based on how I looked. I grew to hate myself so much that I was subjecting myself to crash diets and doing everything I could not to stand out.

I can’t exactly remember what happened that made me want to hate myself less. I think I was just exhausted, and my mental health was left in shambles. I desired to reach a state where I felt “ok” with myself. When I gave up trying to change myself, I entered a state of body neutrality. I refer to body neutrality as a middle ground on the self-esteem spectrum. You no longer actively hate yourself, but it’s also not an abundance of love either. You are simply ok. You are neutral about yourself.

I felt relieved at this stage in my self-love journey. I was no longer at war with myself. It’s a magical feeling that I hope anyone who is struggling with their body image can experience. This is why I believe we need to celebrate reaching body neutrality as a win.

After a while, I wanted more. I wanted to step out with confidence and wear clothing more reflective of my style. I looked to Tess Holliday, plus size model and founder of the #EffYourBeautyStandards community, as an inspiration to build my confidence.

I will admit in the beginning, I had to fake it. I would wear something bold or form-fitting and pretend I had the confidence to pull it off. Meanwhile, on the inside, I was shaking with anxiety and desperately hoping no one would call my bluff. With enough practice of faking it, I no longer had to pretend. I had built confidence, and I continue to do so today.

My best pieces of advice for building confidence. Firstly, curate who and what you surround yourself with: friends, family, and media. I choose to surround myself with people who are kind, supportive and will hype each other up. It’s also important to be selective in the media you take in. Follow people who inspire you creatively or emotionally. Gain perspectives from people who are different than you and want to leave a positive impact. Seek out the representation beneficial to you.

Finally, it’s important to remember that confidence and self-esteem is ever evolving and lives on a fluid scale. It doesn’t get to a set point of 100% and remains there. So, give yourself some grace on the days when it’s harder to feel positive about yourself. Have the strength to try again for better days. You are worthy of the radical act of self-love.

Thanks for sharing that. So, before we get any further into our conversation, can you tell our readers a bit about yourself and what you’re working on?

I am a photographer and artist, born and raised in Cresco, IA. I’ve always had a vivid imagination, which naturally drew me to look for creative outlets. I started to gravitate towards photography around the age of ten. I started taking pictures using disposable film cameras my dad would buy for family vacations. Soon, it became more than just a way to keep me entertained on family trips but rather a new passion and the need to keep evolving my skills. In June of 2024, I graduated from Savannah College of Art and Design (SCAD) with a BFA in Photography.

During my last year at SCAD, I began and developed my ongoing photographic series titled, “Portrait Complexities: Dismantling the False Body Positivity Narrative”. This work exclusively focuses on portraiture of plus size people and goes beyond a generalized body positivity label.
These portraits offer an intimate and authentic look into an individual’s reflection of self.

While developing this series, it was important to me to not only provide body representation but also to illustrate complex emotions, such as empowerment, vulnerability, and neutrality. I did not want the series dismissed as superficial body positivity.

“Portrait Complexities” is a body of work that I am the proudest of. Beyond contributing representation that is personal to me, this series will always be special because of the interactions I’ve had with the people participating in the photoshoots. I love being able to connect with people and make them feel comfortable. It takes trust and vulnerability on my subject’s part to be photographed for a project like this, and that is something I don’t take lightly. Therefore, I want to make sure that everyone on my set is comfortable and has a positive experience.

As for the future of “Portrait Complexities”, I’m excited to keep expanding the series to showcase more diversity among my plus size models. I’m hoping to publish photographs from this series into a book. I will post updates regarding this via my Instagram @allystudios. Above all else, I’m eager to continue photographing and working within the plus size community.

Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?

The three most important qualities to obtain, regardless of your profession, are empathy, resilience, and the ability to ask for help.

Empathy:

Empathy allows you to forge connections with people who are different than you. It is also a wonderful way to gain perspectives and learn more about the world around you. The combination of the acts of listening, understanding, and reciprocating with kindness is what makes empathy so powerful. It cannot be overstated how much the world needs more empathic people.

My advice for fostering empathy is to become more involved with life outside of your daily bubble. Seek out people with different backgrounds than you and listen to their stories. Build relationships with people and show compassion toward them. There is not a single aspect of your life that cannot be improved by showing empathy towards others.

Resilience:

It’s a simple fact that life is hard and brutal at times. You will need to persevere both in your personal and professional life because setbacks are guaranteed. I have endured problems related to my mental and physical health, disabilities, and being in abusive situations. These have resulted in obstacles I needed to overcome to reach my goals. It can feel discouraging to encounter multiple difficulties at once and feel “delayed” in reaching your end goal. That feeling is normal, but you must keep trying to move forward. Persistence is key, and you will overcome it.

My advice for making it through strenuous times is to build your support system and reach out to them often. Your support system is crucial. Always surround yourself with those who care about you and want you to succeed. Next, practice patience. A practice I’m still working on, but it’s important to remind yourself that some things just take more time. Lastly, have belief that everything will work out. You may not know how or when, but everything eventually works out.

Asking for help:

I’m a fiercely independent person and love figuring out things on my own, so asking for help is sometimes a struggle for me. However, asking for help is a sign of strength, not a sign of failure. Everyone needs help sometimes. There are many people in your life who want you to succeed and are willing to help you, all you need to do is ask. Every time I was struggling and asked for help my outlook would improve. While you may not receive an instantaneous solution, getting help means you’re no longer facing your problems alone. Feeling like you’re not alone and having that support has always helped me. So, be brave and vulnerable enough to ask for help and remember that it’s a sign of strength.

How can folks who want to work with you connect?

I am always looking for people to collaborate with. Currently, I have an ongoing portrait series titled, “Portrait Complexities: Dismantling the False Body Positivity Narrative”. This series exclusively works with plus size people, and I am always looking for more participants to model for portrait sessions. No prior modeling experience is required. I’m looking for people of all ages and gender identities to be a part of this project. The series focuses on showcasing authentic portraiture and expressing emotions beyond a generalized body positivity label.

I would also love to collaborate with size-inclusive clothing companies. I love working within the plus size community and providing much needed representation. We deserve to be seen, and we deserve to have a fashionable wardrobe.

If you’re interested in collaborating with me on any project, reach out via my Instagram @allystudios or email me at [email protected]. Thank you.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.allisonmartinek.com
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/allystudios
• Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/allison-martinek

Image Credits

Peyton Zino Photography
Allison Martinek