We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Alyssa Ackerman. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Alyssa below.
Alyssa, so many exciting things to discuss, we can’t wait. Thanks for joining us and we appreciate you sharing your wisdom with our readers. So, maybe we can start by discussing optimism and where your optimism comes from?
Working with dying and grieving people. When you face wild stories, trauma, and loss on a daily basis, you can either submerge deep beneath unbearable grief or you can see the resilience, the strength, and beauty of the people you serve. Witnessing the different ways people approach loss and change has deeply worked on my relationship with fear, anxiety, and my own loss.
Thanks for sharing that. So, before we get any further into our conversation, can you tell our readers a bit about yourself and what you’re working on?
Belonging is a practice and grief ritual is mine.
When we come together to grieve together, we build an unshakeable trust and resilience among people, we build modern villages. When we gather this way, we begin to touch the deepest wounds we each carry around abandonment, fear of exile, and loneliness. When we grieve together, we create spaces strong enough to hold us as we break down. We are able to borrow the strength of others as we crumble, find ourselves, and rebuild. We are able to be a sacred witness to the grief others walk with as we expand our capacity to be with the highs and lows of the human experience.
Community grief practices are a central and missing piece of vibrant, resilient villages that have the capacity to grow and hold deep, healthy, creative, change-making humans. These villages become spaces for wild joy, innovative problem solving, deep bonds, and an aliveness we all crave.
Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
1. Make home in uncertainty. This has been a huge focus in my life. When I did a 9 month van trip, this was my main question. How can I feel at home in uncertainty?
My path has been very indirect and I had no idea WHY I was doing certain things at the time, other than they felt aligned to my purpose and my truth. Looking back, they all build on each other to create a very unique blend of experiences, relationships, and beliefs. Trust yourself, trust your guidance, take one step at a time. Keep asking inwardly. Keep listening.
2. Find your elders and buy them coffee. I have changed careers and directions many times. I have always reached out to those in the field and asked to learn more about them. Not for free, but at LEAST for a cup of coffee or a meal. Honor their time and their experience, learn from them and their paths. Build bridges. See how you can help elevate their work and support their vision as you continue to build yours, knowing each other as peers, collaborators, and friends… not competitors.
3. Consistency. I had no idea the power of consistency until recently. I used to cancel events if no one had signed up until I learned that the showing up… was first for me… and even if one person came, the impact could be life changing. I began showing up no matter what, for no matter how many people were in attendance. My most life changing grief ritual happened when no one showed up to a virtual one I offered and I called my mom to see if she would jump on with me. She, her partner, and our family friend all jumped on and we had the deepest healing around the death of my grandfather that was completely spontaneous and unique. I also got to feel the love of a mother supporting her daughter in what felt like a failed and sad moment of her work. Willingness to learn, to grow, to understand exchange as much wider than financial, has been a powerful motivator for me.
How can folks who want to work with you connect?
One of my main questions is how do we show up as our unique collection of people and design a meaningful ritual on the spot? How do we do this without a shared historic, spiritual, economic, ethnic experience?
I am eagerly looking to collaborate with people around the world in co-creating meaningful grief and remembrance rituals, practices, and happenings.
Calling artists, musicians, ritualists, and those of all different spiritual beliefs to explore how to remember and re-imagine grief ritual for our modern day and our modern villages.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.alyssarosehealingarts.com
- Instagram: @alyssarosehealing
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