We recently connected with Amanda Dzimianski and have shared our conversation below.
Amanda, we’re thrilled to have you sharing your thoughts and lessons with our community. So, for folks who are at a stage in their life or career where they are trying to be more resilient, can you share where you get your resilience from?
This “resilience” you speak of…it ebbs and flows like the tide. Some days I’m a pathetic ball of sniffles and self-pity, and a desire to throw it all away and give up. And some days, I am buoyed by the sense of being connected to something bigger than myself. This might come through any avenue: making art, learning something new about myself and my own system, exploring the natural world as a realm of solace and centering, spending time with people who are willing to dive deeper than the surface of things, feeling like benevolent invisible entities might actually be real, or simply as contributing to the present by just existing. When the tide ebbs, I’m learning to wait for it to come back in. I look for the points of connection when it flows. I am seeking to embrace the cycle, without insisting on my own rigidity.
Thanks for sharing that. So, before we get any further into our conversation, can you tell our readers a bit about yourself and what you’re working on?
I am a lifelong writer with a knack for developmental and line editing, and I currently concentrate on writing poetry. I’ve written and published one collection, Ache is a Passport: Love Letters to Survivors of Spiritual Abuse, examining the process of grieving and transformation that comes from leaving life in a religious cult. I’m also a certified mediator, a self-publishing and certified strengths-based coach, a spiritual alchemist, an aspiring astrologer, and parent to two small kiddos.
Essentially, I help conscious, creative people succeed in their craftwork and personal lives, using a wide array of both practical and spiritual tools. My business is going through some shape-shifting, and all updates and offerings will be reflected on my website and Instagram.
If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?
Self-knowledge, self-trust, and self-compassion have been the most impactful qualities for me to develop. This trifecta is becoming the foundation of everything I do, both creatively and otherwise. I think they’re vital strengths, as well as skill sets that have to be honed.
The gorgeous thing is that these ways of being have a ripple effect—my capacity to truly know, trust, and hold compassion for other people has grown in direct proportion to how consciously and generously I extend them to myself. “As within, so without.”
Any advice for folks feeling overwhelmed?
This is a regular state of being for me, so I feel quite qualified to talk about it! I would say the first bit of advice is to recognize that *it’s okay* that you’re feeling overwhelmed. In fact, it means you’re paying attention. You’re desperately aware of the required focus, energy, attention to detail, and potential impact all wrapped up in the tasks before you, and the problems to solve. It means you care. It means you are attuned, somewhere in the swirl and mess, to what matters (at least to you). And it means you understand that the systems you exist within are absolutely not built for you.
So, when at my best, I lead with self-knowledge and self-compassion. Practically speaking, I use conscious breathing, going outdoors, brain-dumping on paper, timing tasks, a good cry, verbal processing alone or with good listeners who aren’t compelled to “fix” me, and mindful dissociation as tools to help me regulate within the overwhelm. I also quit on occasion! This is seen as a character failing in my cultural climate—and I reject that idea. If something is no longer a fit, I try to trust myself to let it go, and not shame myself for being at capacity.
Every single facet of this advice is a work in progress, and probably will be for the rest of my life.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://amandadzimianski.com/
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amanda.idareyoutospellit/
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