Meet Ari Hader

Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Ari Hader. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.

Ari, so great to have you with us and we want to jump right into a really important question. In recent years, it’s become so clear that we’re living through a time where so many folks are lacking self-confidence and self-esteem. So, we’d love to hear about your journey and how you developed your self-confidence and self-esteem.

There is some toxic positivity around self-confidence that I think in some ways is ingrained in the Hollywood culture. How often have we heard the phrase “fake it till you make it?” For me, in the beginning of my career, this phrase and other advice like it led me to believe that I should never admit when I didn’t do as good a job as I had wanted to do.

But the thing I’ve learned along the way is: there is no yin without the yang. There is no truly being proud of your work, without being able to admit to yourself when you didn’t do as well as you wanted to. And I think a person could really hold themselves back from greatness by not being able to admit fault.

Along the way, my true self-confidence has emerged. And it doesn’t come from a place of thinking that I’m always great and perfect. For me, it comes from a place of knowing that I’m capable of greatness. I have confidence in my ability as an actor, while still knowing that though I’m always striving to do the best work; I will make mistakes sometimes. I will have off days. That’s part of this whole art thing. You learn from it if there’s a lesson to be learned, and you move forward.

Thanks, so before we move on maybe you can share a bit more about yourself?

I’m an actor, with a love of Muay Thai and a passion for music. Right now, I have a short film I starred in, the two-hander walk-and-talk “My Little 818 Heart” touring around the festival circuit. I also am in development for a feature I’m producing and starring in where I play a woman who has six months before she loses her sight due to diabetic retinopathy. The story is that my character meets this older blind woman and the two of them wind up going on a “pre-blindness non-bucket list” road trip before going blind. It was an idea I had a long time ago when I was volunteering at the Braille Institute and our writer, T.C. DeWitt, is an incredibly talented and prolific writer who has written for so many amazing shows and is also legally blind himself. I also have some really exciting things premiering later this year that I can’t talk about just yet! It’s been a really artistically fulfilling time for me, and I’m psyched to just keep the ball rolling.

Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?

The three pieces of knowledge that I wish I had learned earlier were 1) how important mindset is, 2) embracing the things that make you self-conscious, and 3) knowing when to release the white knuckle grasp you have on your career and let things come to you.

My biggest piece of advice to actors I mentor (I’m an NYU Tisch alum and have some NYU mentees), is to work on your mindset now, while you’re in college. I can’t stress enough how much of this career as an actor is mental health and mindset work. Your mindset affects your ability – we do better and freer work when we’re in a positive place. It also affects how industry professionals view you – people are just more attracted to positive people (and are more likely to hire you). With so much rejection in the acting field, keeping a positive mindset is actually really difficult. One “no” too many, or a “no” from a role you thought was for sure a “yes” – and suddenly you’re spiraling. I started meditating about 2 years ago and that has really helped me keep my mind in a positive place. I still spiral sometimes, but it’s a rarer occurrence now that I meditate. I recommend meditation to everyone I meet.

The things that make you different, that make you self-conscious even; those are your superpowers. It took me years to learn this – before I cut my hair off I would go up for these ingenue roles and sometimes get notes about my masculinity. Notably, one director told me “you’re very good but you look like you could beat up our male lead.” (Side note: he was right, I absolutely could.) Once I cut my hair and embraced the masculine parts of myself instead of trying to hide them, things flowed a lot easier. It’s a superpower of mine, my androgyny.

The last one is a more recent discovery, and I don’t want it to be misconstrued that I’m saying “don’t work hard.” Working hard is a huge part of this. I did student films for years and years before upleveling to doing many, many indie films, before finally booking my first big TV role in “Grey’s Anatomy.” But recently I realized that I was white knuckling my career – holding on a little too tight. That’s an energy that people can sense. Don’t confuse working hard with white knuckling – do the work for the auditions you get. Do the work for the roles you book. Fully fill out that character, know how they walk, their history, their secrets, their Pandora station. But also, it’s fun. We love this. And there’s so much that is out of our control. Do the work, and let it go, and trust that the universe has your back.

One of our goals is to help like-minded folks with similar goals connect and so before we go we want to ask if you are looking to partner or collab with others – and if so, what would make the ideal collaborator or partner?

I really want to act in a dramedy that incorporates my musical ability. I’m thinking like “Crazy Ex Girlfriend” meets “Once.” Just really organic little songs along the way of a compelling story. I’m a singer/songwriter/uke player and I’d love to get to act in a project like this and help write the songs as well! Anyone who’s interested in some musical storytelling on film, let’s chat. I think it can be a really beautiful and effective storytelling tool, and I don’t think I’ve seen it done yet the way it is in my head.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://imdb.me/arihader
• Instagram: @arihaderisyourfriend
• Facebook: Ari Hader Actor
• Youtube: @arihader
• Other: Vimeo:

  DRAMATIC REEL: https://vimeo.com/341147438
  COMEDIC REEL: https://vimeo.com/284472316

Image Credits

Bettina Niedermann