We recently connected with Ashley Barker and have shared our conversation below.
Hi Ashley, appreciate you sitting with us today to share your wisdom with our readers. So, let’s start with resilience – where do you get your resilience from?
While I do believe that some of us are gifted with more of a “growth mindset” than others, I also believe it is like a muscle that must be strengthened with practice. Like others, my life has had its challenges. Many of the challenges I faced were very minor and they have helped me to strengthen my muscle of resilience…but the most impactful event of all, the one that forced me to exercise my “growth mindset” muscles came with the birth of my third child. Not only did my unborn child and I face a near death experience, but I would find after 9 years of watching her struggle in her development and experience of symptoms that she was born with an incredibly rare genetic disorder.
From the moment I was old enough to play “house,” I knew that I wanted to be a mother. My dream came true when I met the love of my life and we began our family. My first two pregnancies were as perfect as one could hope for. My husband and I were gifted two beautiful healthy boys two years apart from one another. Which is why the near loss of my third child was so impactful. She and I both survived the birth(barely), she thrived in the NICU as I also recovered, and we both went home with clean bills of health. I felt like I had won the lottery. We had made it through the unthinkable. Until we began to see the signs of her illness. At just three months old she was diagnosed with generalized epilepsy but was also “on watch” because the drs could not quite determine what the true cause of all of her symptoms were. Every day I would hold her in my arms as she struggled with the comings and goings of seizures, and I watched as her overall development faltered. This is where my true resilience and “growth mindset” practice began. I was determined that this little girl of mine was going to be ok. I poured myself into researching her symptoms and finding any help I could for her. Not a day went by that I was not fighting for any possible way to make her life better. Before I knew, it 9 years had passed and the worst of her symptoms truly began. These new symptoms are what led us to the diagnosis of Glut 1 Transport disorder. The estimated prevalence of Glut 1 Transport is thought to be 1 in 24,000. There are only 2,000 cases known worldwide. While a true diagnosis was an incredible gift, the reality of what her possible future would look like soon became grim. Through research and visits with specialists, we found that most adults with Glut 1 Transport disorder were not able to live on their own and support themselves as adults. We continued to watch our baby girl struggle in her daily life with a newfound understanding that it would be up to us and only us to set her up for success. Watching her year after year struggle through her daily symptoms of seizures, migraines, developmental delays, learning disorders, ataxia, dystonia, and extreme exhaustion was what gave me to strength I needed to stay resilient in my life so I could better hers. I have often referred to her as my “little fly in the Vasoline.” She never let any of her differences separate her from her peers. Most people around her have no idea of the struggles she endures. She never lets her guard down. Watching her gives me the motivation and endurance I need to be resilient.
This is where the story of “Windyhill Wildflowers” begins. My husband and I knew that building a family business would be one way to offer opportunity to our little girl. Allowing her to learn basic work skills through the safe space of family was our goal. We spent years thinking and researching what we could possibly start, and then one day it just came to me. A cut flower farm! My husband and I have always been lovers of nature. He grew up on farm acreage with a mother and sister who loved to ride horses and a father who was devoted to the daily upkeep of the family farm. While our knowledge of running a flower farm is still limited, our passion makes up for what we lack. After a few months of research about flower farming, we decided to jump head first this year into making it into a family business. Our hope is to grow the flower farm into a place where all are welcome. We hope that the flowers we grow and the story we tell bring joy and inspiration to everyone. There is beauty to be found in the struggle.
Appreciate the insights and wisdom. Before we dig deeper and ask you about the skills that matter and more, maybe you can tell our readers about yourself?
Building a family business has been a dream for both Jarret and me for quite some time. We’ve spent countless evenings on our back porch, reflecting on our “why” and researching the possibilities for “what” our business could be. It still feels surreal when I think back to the magical moment the idea of building a cut flower farm came to mind. Even more magical was seeing Jarret become just as excited about it as I was.
Without a doubt, our children are always our primary “why,” but our shared desire to take on challenges together is a close second. Like many couples, we’ve faced our share of obstacles over the years, but each one has only brought us closer and made us stronger as a team. I feel incredibly blessed to be stepping into this new chapter of life with my best friend and greatest teammate by my side.
Our dream for our flower farm is to offer a product as well as a place for others to experience our shared joy in the beauty of nature, while doing our best for nature itself. Phase one of our business is basically just getting the flower fields up and running. To begin with, we are offering fresh from the farm flower bouquets. Many Americans unaware that 80% of the cut flowers purchased in the United States come from overseas. We see this as a great opportunity to reduce the environmental impact of the cut flower industry as well as upkeep sustainable practices. We offer fresh, sustainably grown flowers and we pride ourselves in our ability to help the pollinator population. According to the National Park Service, pollinators are basically responsible for helping to produce 1 of every 3 bites of food we take.
Phase two of our business plan will be to bring our buyers out into the fields for u-picks and other types of events. For now, we look forward to offering our field fresh bouquets through our website and social media.
Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
Without a doubt the most valuable skill I have learned along my journey is the ability to see things from multiple perspectives. When something does not go the way I think it should, I quickly evaluate the situation from different angles. I feel that this helps me not only see the good that usually happens alongside the bad, but it also helps me to properly reflect in the moment and adjust my sails as needed to continue full steam ahead. When my daughter was diagnosed with Glut 1 Transport Disorder, I certainly allowed myself to feel the disappointment and frustration that comes with such news, but then I changed my viewpoint. I put myself in the shoes of a parent who’s child’s diagnosis was a terminal illness. verses a medical condition. Seeing the situation from a different viewpoint really allowed me to reflect on all of the positives in my particular situation. I found myself energized and motivated to continue pushing forward for the good it could do for her. The empathy and appreciation you will gain through seeing things from different perspectives can be powerful motivation to stay the course. If you find yourself stuck in a negative loop, it’s time to try on another pair of shoes.
Self reflection is another skill that I have found to be highly useful in my journey. My favorite genre of books might just be “self-help” books. I have a natural gift of stepping back and evaluating myself in order to grow myself. I would not consider myself to be competitive by any means, except for the fact that I am incredibly competitive with myself. I am always looking for ways to make my weak spots better. Having this self-awareness gained through reflection has enabled me to lean heavy on my strengths and know when to hold back in my areas of weakness. When I am seeking more ways to reflect, I look into a new book or podcast. There is always something to new to learn about ourselves and always areas that we can grow. Self reflection is the only way to get there.
I know the saying “curiosity killed the cat” is one we hear often but it is inaccurate. The original saying is “curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back.” Curiosity is something that feeds my soul. My journey would not have been what it has been without my desire to KNOW MORE. Curiosity has led me to ideas that I would have never imagined alone. I allow myself to “wonder” and I allow my mind to “wander.” Our world has become so fast paced that we tend to just take things as they are. The ability to stop and think is ours. We just have to take it. Even when I find my path to be successful, I stop and think about why. Why did this work so well? What might have happened if we did things differently? What have I learned about a particular success or failure? What is something I can do differently next time. Be curious! Ask questions. Thirst for knowledge.
All the wisdom you’ve shared today is sincerely appreciated. Before we go, can you tell us about the main challenge you are currently facing?
Starting a business has always been a dream of mine, and I am finally at a place where I have the opportunity to fulfill that dream. Taking the first steps to build my business have probably been the scariest things I have ever done in my life. I have never felt so vulnerable. I have never felt so afraid. I have to daily remind myself that I have what it takes to succeed. I tell myself that I can overcome the fear that is trying to hold me captive. I am affirming myself daily, and reflecting on all the positive things that have happened so far as I live out this dream of mine. However, I am also allowing myself grace. There will be some bumps along the way, the best lessons always come from failure. While I certainly do not plan on failing, I do plan to roll with the punches. Those lessons only come once.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://windyhillwildflowers.com/
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/windyhillwildflowers/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61567313743393
Image Credits
All images I took myself
so if you or someone you know deserves recognition please let us know here.
