Meet Autumn Lee Koomen

We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Autumn Lee Koomen. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Autumn below.

Autumn , thanks so much for taking the time to share your insights and lessons with us today. We’re particularly interested in hearing about how you became such a resilient person. Where do you get your resilience from?

As a professional photographer, I cherish photographs as sacred. One of my most treasured images is a black-and-white photo from the 1950s that has sat on my home altar for years. It captures my mother as a young child sitting in a stroller, surrounded by her mother, great-grandmother, great-great-grandmother, and great-great-great-grandmother. Five generations of women—brilliant, strong, yet tethered by the limitations of their time.

My grandmother, for instance, was the valedictorian of a massive high school, bursting with intelligence. But she got married the day after graduation, never learned to drive, never worked outside the home, and by age 20, had three children, including twins. The women in my lineage danced with depression, powerlessness, and the toxicities of a patriarchal society. I honor my ancestry and hold profound gratitude for the women who came before me, yet I also carry an inherited sadness—a “legacy seed” of pain rooted in generations. My mother, though doing her best, made choices influenced by her struggles: financial instability, deep depression, domestic abuse, and mental illness. These choices laid the foundation of my origin—an origin that both wounded and fortified me.

Walking my path, I have cultivated tools, strategies, and, most importantly, empathy. I have a visceral compassion for those who suffer and for those who feel emotionally trapped. But I refuse to live a life defined by sadness. My dedication to healing has reshaped my understanding of my lineage and allowed me to see my relatives through a lens of compassion. The study of epigenetics tells us that trauma lives in our bodies, passed down through generations. For me, healing means staying present with the pain I have inherited. Perhaps for the first time in my family’s history, I have the capacity, safety, and privilege to confront and release this pain. The cycle of suffering ends with me.

I am resilient—not because I bounce back from pain, but because I can sit with it. Resilience isn’t about moving past difficulties or pretending to be fine. It’s about honoring the mess, feeling it fully, and untangling the threads that bound me to adversity. True resilience is staying with the damage long enough to understand it, working through the intricacies, and trusting that healing is possible. It’s about looking at the heavy, painful core of suffering, being curious about it, and knowing that in time, you can unpack it and thrive.

This is resilience and the work of healing: to hold space for suffering, to honor its truth, and then, to finally set it free.

Thanks for sharing that. So, before we get any further into our conversation, can you tell our readers a bit about yourself and what you’re working on?

I am a photographer driven by the belief in hope, healing, and helping. My work and mission are rooted in raising the vibration, inspiring connection, and fostering positive change.

This year, I celebrate 18 years as a photography business owner. My work has allowed me to witness the most profound moments in people’s lives—births, weddings, milestones, losses, and recoveries. It has deepened my curiosity about the messy, emotional essence of being human. What I’ve learned is that no one escapes sadness; we all carry chapters of pain. When I fully embraced the universality of suffering, my perspective shifted; empathy was born, and compassion awakened.

Through photography, I’ve grown deeply contemplative about this Earthly journey and the people I share it with. Over the years, I’ve witnessed the defining moments of my clients’ lives—both the joyous and the heartbreaking. This perspective has shaped me into someone who can see and hold two truths at once: honoring profound darkness while remaining open to light. Pema Chödrön, a Buddhist teacher, says, “If you’re invested in security and certainty, you are on the wrong planet.” We are here to feel and grow and often our expansion happens via discomfort of the Earthly human experience. Navigating life’s messiness requires stillness, emotional resilience, and a willingness to sit with uncertainty. That is where we find the opportunity for transformation.

The women before me did not have the capacity to thrive, but I do. I heal for me, for them and for all of us. If you have the capacity to heal, now is the time. As Christiane Northrup writes, “Every woman who heals herself helps heal all the women who came before her and all those who come after her.”

Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?

My advice best advice is trust your feelings, your intuition, and your truth. Be still and curious about your emotions. Ask yourself: Are these feelings truly mine, or were they passed down? Let go of those who cause you pain—you cannot heal them. Most importantly, do your best to avoid creating more situations that you’ll need to recover from.

One practice that has supported me in healing is Tonglen, a meditation method rooted in compassion. Known as “taking and sending,” Tonglen transforms our usual tendency to avoid suffering. With each in-breath, I visualize taking in pain—my own or others’—and with each out-breath, I send out healing, compassion, and relief. When I feel sadness spiraling, Tonglen reminds me that suffering is not uniquely mine. I breathe in for all who share my pain and breathe out healing for us all. This practice has taught me to sit with suffering—not to bury it, but to feel it fully and let it go. When I have a photography client who comes to me feeling insecurity or inadequacy, I breathe that in for the client and for all those experiencing similar feelings, and I send out confidence, adequacy, and relief.

When life feels overwhelming and the amount of hurt in the world seems unmanageable, I sit in Tonglen practice with that. I breathe in feelings of despair, darkness, and suffering, and I breathe out feelings of wellness, brightness, and light—a sense of newness. I breathe in completely, taking in negative energy through all of my body. When I breathe out, I radiate positive energy completely, through all of my body. This is a practice of resilience; it is not running from pain but rather completely feeling it in order to free it.

Alright so to wrap up, who deserves credit for helping you overcome challenges or build some of the essential skills you’ve needed?

I have become the woman I needed when I was younger; I am my own guru. Proudly imperfect, I strive every day to do better, to be better, to know more.

I work to move more slowly, ask more questions, give myself more grace, and consequently, that extends to all those I encounter. I am both open-hearted and emotionally fortified. I welcome all those who are trying their best, navigating their pain, addressing their messy legacy, and unweaving their unhealthy choices. I can see and hold space for the pain of others, but I cannot do their work. The journey is theirs—uncovering and moving through pain is an active personal choice. Trying to save them is a disservice to them, a bypass of their own journey. Doing our own growth and healing is our Earthly purpose. I have let go of a lot of people, including family members who are stuck in their own suffering loops and continue to cause harm. I have let clients go who, because of their own pain, are unkind to me and others. I practice Tonglen for them and for us all.

I am a new generation of femininity, of feminism, of maternal knowing. I am a woman who trusts herself and knows her power. This energy is full of empathy; it is profoundly nurturing and completely heart-centered. It is rooted in self-worth and pride for who I have become, and most importantly, it is rooted in deep trust of my own intuition. This is the magic—completely trusting your intuition.

For so long, women have been silenced, controlled, and made to feel crazy for speaking their truth. For so long, we were forced to listen to clergy, political leaders, and toxic male family members. I am done with that. Listen to your intuition, trust your feelings, follow your heart; you are your own guru. I believe this is the path to collective-generational healing. The person most helpful in your life is you- You are who you have been waiting for. Practice Tonglen for yourself and others.

If you have the capacity to heal, now is the time.
Proudly imperfect, you are ready.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.theautumnlee.com/
• Instagram: @autumnleestudios