Meet Ayça Okay

We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Ayça Okay a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.

Hi Ayça , appreciate you sitting with us today. Maybe we can start with a topic that we care deeply about because it’s something we’ve found really sets folks apart and can make all the difference in whether someone reaches their goals. Self discipline seems to have an outsized impact on how someone’s life plays out and so we’d love to hear about how you developed yours?
The concept of time presents a profound challenge, eliciting diverse narratives from philosophers who delve into its intricacies through the lenses of science and philosophy. Time is the measured or measurable period during which an action, process, or condition exists or continues. One notable philosopher, Henri Bergson, posits that “time” has two faces. The first face is “objective time,” represented by watches, calendars, and train timetables. The second face, “la durée” or “duration,” encompasses “lived time,” the subjective experience within us. It is the time felt, lived, and acted upon.

This is my narrative, weaving together objective time and lived time, reflecting various phases of my life. I understood essential truths about myself in my late twenties for those unfamiliar with my background. Until that age, time was merely something I existed in, and I didn’t fully grasp its passage. First and foremost, I was raised by a highly successful woman—my mother, who served as an executive in a corporate company for 30 years. Her resilience and ambitious character significantly influenced my upbringing, making active engagement in professional working life a natural aspect that I never considered something to complain about.

I was raised in a charming country house in Urla, İzmir, nestled in the heart of nature with a picturesque bay shoreline. Outdoor activities were an integral part of my upbringing. I often feel nostalgic for those unique moments when my bike gang and I roamed carefreely, exploring the abandoned sites once inhabited by the Greek people. Like any other child, I possessed a remarkable talent for dreaming and improvising during those times.

Due to my early hyperactivity, balanced with activities such as volleyball, basketball, equestrian, creative drama, and painting classes, my family believed channeling my energy into dynamic and challenging pursuits was key to instilling calmness, patience, and spiritual advancement. Playing volleyball professionally in primary school, alongside basketball and creative drama, felt normal, contrasting with classmates solely focused on exam preparation. I think being an athletic person during my teenage years was one of the essential things that shaped my self-discipline.

I am grateful to my mother, who, out of necessity, exposed me to various sports simply because she had limited time to hang out with me – just joking! But the reality was, I understood early on, that sacrifices were necessary to achieve a goal. Our training schedule in sports mirrored this understanding; skipping push-ups meant being benched in the match lineup, and missing weekend training resulted in a punishment parkour, especially as the team captain for almost 10 years. Punishments and rewards became integral to my discipline from an early age.

By age 25, armed with the lessons learned from mistakes and increased self-awareness, I became audacious enough to make bold decisions, including a career change despite being educated for a family business. Embracing new lifestyles, adopting fresh approaches, and adjusting to new environments felt easy and feasible. I operated under the belief that anything is achievable if pursued with determination, acknowledging potential consequences yet embracing the unknown. Over the last seven years, I worked in three different institutions simultaneously, practicing my passions as an independent curator. I completed my second master’s program, provided consultancy to various corporate companies seeking to fund art projects, curated various exhibitions, authored pieces for various publications, worked as a co-producer with artists, participated in charity organizations, and volunteered for fundraising projects for the diverse focus groups mainly consisting of women and children. I never lamented my busy schedule because, ultimately, I have a target to achieve before my forties. Thus, I strive to balance urgency and patience, avoiding complacency, greed, or indifference.

The thing I forgot to notice was the “objective” time that passed rapidly, catching up with my personal life. I don’t feel any enthusiasm to have a personal life, and it has become customary to me. But I was a social butterfly, after all and this was making me upset. I almost forgot how to take care of myself due to the stress driven by ambitions, dealing with the challenges of daily life, and navigating the socio-economic problems set by autocratic policymakers in a troubled region like Turkey (which I often describe as both a curse and a blessing). Dealing with people has also been challenging, as almost everyone I encountered took time to handle. I was working tirelessly day and night, and one incident stands out: I wasn’t seeing my friends; I didn’t even want to talk on the phone with them. I worked so hard on installing an exhibition that I forgot to pick up my dog from the vet, where I had dropped him off early in the morning. He spent the night there because of me, and I realized I was a really bad mother. I cried for hours; I think it was my first loud sign of burnout.

Until the beginning of last year, my life was about being unsatisfied with almost every achievement, being angry during the day at people who are now working the way I desire them to work with me, or too greedy to go for some challenges after and after. I had self-discipline based on not balancing the “objective” and “lived” time concept. During a routine check-up, a tumor was discovered in my system, changing my whole perspective on time. I slowly realized that there is an actual time that is objective, as Bergson stated, and I should be careful about revising my self-discipline principles from head to toe; it was obvious that I can’t proceed like this. I need to find a stress level balance while achieving my goals. But I was raised with a discipline since my early age that dissatisfaction is the key to success and making achievable goals possible.

I need to prove to myself that this notion is incorrect. I understand that self-discipline is a gradual journey that involves several key strategies. I begin by setting clear goals, making them specific and achievable. I emphasize “achievable” because some of my previous goals were too rational yet too challenging, leading to potential burnout. Breaking down larger objectives into smaller, manageable tasks and prioritizing them based on importance is essential. I have revamped my daily routine, drawing inspiration from my training schedule. However, being a social butterfly, making significant sacrifices can be disheartening. To address this, I’ve implemented a rewards and punishment system. For instance, if I desire a night out, there will be a corresponding punishment, such as reading an article or exploring a new concept relevant to my upcoming research period. This system is almost as crucial as putting on makeup before heading out for a night on the town.

I revised my daily routine to create consistency in my actions, and gradually incorporated healthy habits such as exercise, nutrition, and sufficient sleep. Sleep was something that I sacrificed in the past as well. I still can’t say that I am doing great at that one. For approximately a year, I have followed smaller tasks to build momentum and gradually take on more challenging ones as my confidence grows. I identified and eliminated physical and digital distractions to maintain focus. This part is vital as well. Social media is something very dangerous for people raised with dissatisfaction like me. In the previous years, especially during the pandemic, social media dopamine freakness became a reflex to me, and being an independent curator makes this detoxing process more challenging because the only marketing platform you may use to show your works is possible through social media. Anyways, I incorporated mindfulness techniques to stay centered and resist impulses, such as starting therapy and some ancient techniques during meditation. I was lucky because I am used to holding myself accountable by setting deadlines and sharing my goals with supportive friends, mentors, or family members. I started to learn from setbacks, viewing them as opportunities for improvement rather than failures. And I learned to celebrate achievements, no matter how small, and use positive reinforcement to stay motivated. I always keep one bottle of bubbly booze (which my friends love to drink) to celebrate even small successes. In the past, I even did not enjoy my significant success moments; I was always focused on the struggles and bad parts of those experiences. I never thought that I deserve a celebration moment because I have more goals to proceed, and my objective time was running out. I cultivate a positive mindset, surround myself with supportive influences, and continuously assess and adjust my strategies for ongoing improvement.

I’ve learned that building self-discipline is a dynamic process that requires patience, consistency, and a commitment to personal growth. My formula is based on balancing the “objective” and “lived” time; I am a stronger person now. I want to be a marathon runner rather than a hundred-meter runner in good mental health.

Great, so let’s take a few minutes and cover your story. What should folks know about you and what you do?
I, Ayça Okay, born in 1991 in Izmir, am an accomplished curator actively operating between Istanbul and Berlin. Holding memberships in AICA Turkey (Association Internationale des Critiques d’Art) and CIMAM (International Committee of Museums and Collections of Modern Art), I bring a wealth of expertise to the contemporary art scene.

My curatorial approach centers around research-based projects, fostering intellectual resources, knowledge-sharing, and the establishment of sustainable support systems. Collaboration is at the heart of my practice, as I prioritize listening to individuals, communities, and institutions.

As a curator, my goal is to generate unique discourses on contemporary issues, transcending artificial boundaries within the art world. I perceive art as a byproduct of specific processes, including thoughts, ideas, texts, theories, and experiments.

My research spans diverse topics such as urbanism, anthropocentrism, eco-criticism, entanglement theory in archaeology, and feminist and queer curating. With a notable master’s degree in Art Theory and Criticism, I bring a comprehensive understanding to the field.

Since 2018, I have curated and managed exhibitions for prestigious collections, including Borusan Contemporary Museum, Contemporary Istanbul Foundation, Yves Rocher Foundation, and Baksı Museum. In Berlin, I have curated exhibitions at prominent project spaces and galleries such as Vorfluter Projektraum, Scope Berlin, and Somos Arts. Notably, I co-curated Istanbul The Lights, Turkey’s first light festival, and curated a solo exhibition for renowned Turkish contemporary artist Canan Tolon titled “Limbo.”

Beyond curatorial work, I have consulted on art projects for corporate organizations like Turkish Airlines and QNB-FinansBank. As the former Art Programs Director at Contemporary Istanbul Foundation, I actively engaged in fundraising projects with the Consulates General of Ukraine and Poland.

In 2022, the SAHA Association supported me as a member curator for the CIMAM platform, recognizing my contributions to the field. My articles have been published in notable publications like Stir World, Milliyet Sanat, and Artdog Magazine. I have moderated and participated in panels and meetings at prestigious events such as Loop Barcelona Fair, BASE Istanbul, and the Collective Healing Project Public Program, supported by ZOMA Museum in cooperation with Istanbul Metropolitan Municipality and Turkish Women Association.

I pursued my studies in BMA at Istanbul Technical University, followed by an MA in Theory Of Arts and Criticism from Isık University Visual Arts in Istanbul. Additionally, I completed the International Curatorial Program (ICP) at NODE Center for Curatorial Studies in Berlin. Selected for the Culture Route program by IKSV and UNESCO in 2021, I further solidified my standing in the art world.

In the years 2022-2023, I had the honor of serving as a jury member for APEXART’s art competitions in New York. Recently elected as a board member of the BAKSI Museum, I proudly represent the contemporary art ecosystem for TÜSİAD Berlin Bosphorus Initiative. My multifaceted contributions to the art world underscore my commitment to shaping and enriching the cultural landscape.

Contact Info:

Image Credits
Photograph used by Courtesy of the Moving Memories exhibition Borusan Contemporary Museum Photopgraphs used by the Courtesy of the Artist Shirin Abedinirad Limbo Installation shots used by the courtesy of the artist Canan Tolon Installation video used by courtesy of the Taksim Maksim exhibition Installation video used by courtesy of the Taksim Maksim exhibition Installation video used by courtesy of the Taksim Maksim exhibition Photopgraphs used by the Courtesy of the Artist Shirin Abedinirad Limbo Installation shots used by the courtesy of the artist Canan Tolon De-Mold Installation shots used by the courtesy of Anouk Kruithof and Ali Kazma, Istanbul

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