We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Beth Harbinson a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.
Beth, we’re thrilled to have you on our platform and we think there is so much folks can learn from you and your story. Something that matters deeply to us is living a life and leading a career filled with purpose and so let’s start by chatting about how you found your purpose.
Listening. A friend who I had dared to share this crazy idea with encouraged me to enter a pitch competition to se if i could get seed money to start things up. If I had not listened to her and been brave enough to start talking about this idea, it never would have manifested into anything.
It is also thinking about what matters to you but perhaps even more importantly, what bothers you. It was the injustice of feeling like a second-class guest at galas where I had paid the same for my ticket as everyone else and being served soda at the bar or going out to celebrate and NOT having a fancy “umbrella drink” like others.
Finding purpose matters because honestly it is the premium gas that fills my tank most days.
Let’s take a small detour – maybe you can share a bit about yourself before we dive back into some of the other questions we had for you?
After you read this, if you’re like me, you may check out my bio on LinkedIn. It will say I’ve had a successful career….and it’s all true I wear the labels of wife, mother, daughter, grandmother, volunteer, philanthropist, activist, and dog lover (we have 3) proudly.
And NOT on my bio, I’ll share that in 2001, I received a JUST OVER THE LIMIT DUI and I quit drinking because of the shame and remorse I felt.
2 years later, at a work conference in Miami, I started drinking again. No thought behind it, I just did. And for the next 2 years, I drank with a vengeance. Like someone had poured gasoline on a fire.
The last 6 months weren’t about getting drunk or feeling some way. My drinking just got me to a place of normalcy. I ran a successful fundraising consulting firm at the time, employed 7, and was President of the PTA (yes really). On Super Bowl Monday 17 years ago, I woke up and again, because of an embarrassing situation, I reached out for help – therapy and a 12-step program worked for me.
About a year into my recovery from alcoholism, a friend I used to drink with offered me a lemon drop shooter at a party. When I politely declined, he asked in an incredulous tone “What’s wrong with you?”
At that moment, I realized my struggle to stay sober was not just with myself but also with a society that normalizes drinking.
My “go to” beverage is water – LOVE IT. Zero calories, Zero carbs and out of the tap But it doesn’t scream “PARTY” to me.
Alcoholism is on the rise. At Howard County General Hospital in 2022, alcohol related cases were the #1 reason for admission, eclipsing overdose for the first time.
14.5 million people have diagnosed themselves with alcoholism.
It is the 7th highest risk factor for deaths accounting for 2.8 million in 2021.
Last year, a dear friend lost his 36-year-old daughter to alcoholism. She was a single mom with an 11-year-old daughter. And this story is not unique.
When people do get help or quit drinking, the 1st 18 months are hard and relapse rates are at their highest. Even images seen for a millisecond can be triggering. So, for most people, going to a bar, club, entertainment venue, stadium or party is either out or difficult.
That’s why I founded Sobar – a play on the words sober and bar – and we are on a mission to provide and promote innovative adult beverage options to those who cannot or choose not to drink alcohol.
Our challenge is growing our non-profit so we can bring NA to MORE large festivals and public celebrations and to work with bars and restaurants to raise awareness of the need (and the profitability) of including ADULT NA selections for their guests.
And in addition, we want to spread the word about the importance of NA inclusion at events ANYONE hosts. We hope everyone reading this will offer choice because the guest who wants this may be the one who doesn’t want to ask.
Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
Networking is like matchmaking – I really love making connections for people and this has served me well because making connections is sometimes the most important thing you can do to help someone else out. Especially someone who might not have had the privileges you’ve had growing up. I do believe what goes around comes around.
Know what you don’t know and be willing to talk with someone who does.
Debate and public speaking. I learned to debate in high school and the research skills I acquired are still in use today. I also became comfortable speaking to others. When you can advocate for yourself and spread the word about your work or the mission of your non-profit in my case, it is an asset.
Thanks so much for sharing all these insights with us today. Before we go, is there a book that’s played in important role in your development?
Holly Whitaker’s Quit Like a Woman opened my eyes to the science behind substance use disorder, specifically alcoholism. In addition, it made me understand that there really are large forces at play in continuing to promote alcohol and people who can handle it as “normal” and those of us who can’t as the odd person out. She believes that one day, we’ll look at big alcohol the way we look at big tobacco. Alcohol is an addictive substance. For some, more lethal than for others, but it is addictive.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.drinksobar.org/
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drinksobar/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drinksobar
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/beth-harbinson-57b40415
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v1QM8NcoXTE
