Meet Brie Pereboom

We were lucky to catch up with Brie Pereboom recently and have shared our conversation below.

Hi Brie, we’re so appreciative of you taking the time to share your nuggets of wisdom with our community. One of the topics we think is most important for folks looking to level up their lives is building up their self-confidence and self-esteem. Can you share how you developed your confidence?

It is still very much a work in progress, but I do feel like it’s growing and getting stronger, each day. I didn’t anticipate that recovering from a traumatic divorce would take me this long, and then I zoom out, and remind myself that it wasn’t one incident. It was a breaking point that shed a lot of light on how I had been previously allowing a number of people to treat me, how I had been living in fear, and people pleasing to avoid conflict.

I’ve gained so much clarity from this experience and I continue to practice letting go of “people pleasing” and instead embracing experiences that bring me joy, and that feel aligned with my goals. It’s still scary to tell people “no”, but it’s getting easier and my response time is quicker. I’ve carefully selected my group of friends, who I feel safe to honestly communicate with, and their support is instrumental to my growing confidence. I am also growing the belief that my worth is inherent and not earned by “people pleasing.”

Photography and boudoir have also been a consistent part of my journey. Whether I am in front of my camera taking boudoir photos of myself, or behind the camera photographing clients and friends, having a space to be creative and express feelings through art has helped me to expand my confidence, both personally and professionally.

Great, so let’s take a few minutes and cover your story. What should folks know about you and what you do?

Boudoir photography is really special, because it can look so different to each person. I love seeing the transformation of clients throughout the shoot as they start to loosen up and embrace the experience; their energy is completely shifted at the end of their session. Most people, understandably, feel a little bit shy or nervous before their photo shoot, especially if it’s their first one. I love seeing them feel so energized after their session; the spark they start to see in themselves is really beautiful and rewarding.

I have SO many ideas cooking for the future of Opal Hour Photo, but I’ve taken some new education/coaching to heart. I’ve decided to try the opposite of the hustle culture, to remove that expectation from myself, and continue building my foundation, first. Running a small business feels like being in the dessert line, at a buffet, and everything looks SO good, but by the end of your meal you feel really sick, and overwhelmed, with all the things you’ve piled on your plate.

I’m making an intentional decision to unsubscribe from those beliefs, to reimagine what running my business can look like, and to dream up how I can thoughtfully support my clients.

Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?

In a previous article with Bold Journey, I shared that the three most impactful qualities for a small business owner were: self discipline, financial education, and mental health. I would still agree with those three skills today, though, I’d re-order them to: mental health, financial education, and self discipline.

I think that mental health is the foundation on which everything in our lives is built. Once that is being tended to, as an on-going part of life, financial education comes next. If you don’t have the mental capacity to face your finances, how are you going to make wise business decisions? – I wasn’t, and not for a lack of trying, but for a lack of education, understanding, and mental space/fortitude.

If you have a “big picture” of what your taxes and costs of running your business actually look like, then you can start to practice self discipline, by working towards a goal. You can be disciplined by showing up at your desk every day, which is a HUGE first step, and sometimes that’s all you might have the energy for. (Again, mental health comes first.) But, if you know what your financial goal is, or if you have a comprehensive understanding of what your yearly expenses are, you can practice self discipline in saving for those goals, or challenging yourself to show up more intentionally for your clients.

Looking back over the past 12 months or so, what do you think has been your biggest area of improvement or growth?

When you finally get tired of replaying the same negative beliefs in your head, and you have the necessary tools to fight them off, it’s life changing. My day-to-day life still looks very similar to where I was last year, with the exception of the loss of our sweet, golden retriever, Olive. Most people probably wouldn’t notice the changes that I’ve gone through internally, but I have more energy, more hope, and more drive to reach my goals. My self-talk is much kinder, with plenty of room for improvement, still. My time is spent more intentionally. I spend money more intentionally and SAVE money more intentionally. And, I am growing trust with myself by honoring my commitments to myself, accomplishing small and manageable goals, and expanding my self efficacy.

The best advice that has been shared with me, so many times, from multiple people, is to start small. If you’ve seen the Spongebob episode where Patrick wants to earn an award, Spongebob has him “start small”, by opening an empty jar. Find your “empty jar” and start there – but don’t forget to celebrate even your tiniest of wins!

Image Credits

Ashley
Madison
Jen