We were lucky to catch up with Cara-Michele Nether recently and have shared our conversation below.
Hi Cara-Michele, thank you so much for opening up with us about some important, but sometimes personal topics. One that really matters to us is overcoming Imposter Syndrome because we’ve seen how so many people are held back in life because of this and so we’d really appreciate hearing about how you overcame Imposter Syndrome.
Imposter syndrome, oh boy, where do I even begin? It’s been quite the companion on my journey, lurking in the shadows, ready to pounce whenever I dare to dream big.
My tradition is to continuously put myself in new and challenging situations. As a result, I’ve become good friends with self-doubt and imposter syndrome. We hang out a lot.
Joining a martial arts group full of young white men who regularly expressed different world views is one example of choosing to be outside of my comfort zone.
I committed to the training and worked through the tough times because I knew that the instructor and the experience would pave the way for me to be the woman I wanted.
Representing one of the few gay, black, females in the organization for most of my 19 years of training has forced me to work with my fears and self-doubt. Being the lead instructor in a martial arts school full of big and powerful men is an excellent opportunity for self-doubt to take the wheel.
Over the years I’ve learned to practice partnering with those feelings instead of fighting against them.
Don’t get me wrong. Sometimes, I still feel that I’m safest staying small and cozy in my little predictable bubble. But after a while, comfort starts to feel limiting.
Two of the primary values in my life are to “find joy in personal growth and to be useful in the world.” If I don’t venture out of my bubble, stretch my legs, or learn something new about myself, I feel icky inside.
Great, so let’s take a few minutes and cover your story. What should folks know about you and what you do?
As the owner of Strength & Vitality Wellness Center, I have introduced myself as a licensed acupuncturist, functional nutrition counselor, and personal trainer for years.
Now, I’m a Health and Wellness Coach for Busy Working Women. I aim to eliminate frustration and disappointment by walking women through a more straightforward, efficient process of generating the mental and physical energy they need.
The ultimate goal is to make feeling proud of how they show up for the people and projects they love an everyday experience.
I’ve worked as a health and wellness practitioner for the past 19 years and have learned a ton about women’s health and wellness journies. Like many of you, COVID-19 allowed me to pause and evaluate life.
Out of that reflection came the Strength & Vitality Accelerator. This training program shows women more accessible paradigms around self-care. Ideas like:
• The value of slow practice versus self-sabotaging overwhelm.
• The benefit of focusing on the foundations of health and wellness versus the latest fads.
• The growth that comes from learning in a curated coaching and peer community versus going it alone.
The founding maxim is “Nothing matters more than how you feel, so choose to feel good.”
The Strength & Vitality Accelerator is the realization of my next calling to cast a wider net. I’m ready to have a more significant impact by sharing in wider circles. To share the no-nonsense process of simplifying health and wellness and to make it easy for women to cultivate consistent mental and physical energy.
Then, they can activate their powers in ways that resonate with their values.
Throughout my career, I’ve witnessed women sacrificing their mental and physical well-being to juggle family responsibilities, work commitments, and caring for aging relatives. This observation has inspired me to help women clarify the path toward becoming the “woman of their dreams” and optimize their health and wellness. My approach focuses on bite-size practices that lead to magnetic habits. Making habits out of wellness fundamentals reduces the prevalence of frustration, pain, and disappointment and fuels our ability for clarity, connection, and contribution.
In my experience, giving women permission to take the time they need to truly absorb and integrate the most constructive wellness practices into their busy lives is the quickest and least painful way to generate sustainable mental and physical energy with less strain and struggle. The quantity and quality of everything we do and say comes from the mental and physical reserves we have at the moment. Having a process to reliably generate the energy we need is a game worth playing.
My big vision is to see an increasing number of mature women with high levels of mental and physical juice left over after caring for their families. They can then use their innate and learned skills and wisdom like innovative thinking, effective communication, and partnership-driven collaboration to solve world problems they have a passion for.
I understand a lot about busy women’s lives. A clear understanding of who they are and what they hold important in their hearts is often missing. Disconnection from these insights causes us to lose focus and follow every shiny object that passes our way. This is a root cause of frustration, overwhelm, and the dreaded health and wellness rollercoaster. You know, the one where you are super excited about your new health plan only to fall off a week later, over and over again. The result is disappointment and stifling negative self-talk. No fun.
As a 55-year-old woman who wears multiple hats as a business owner, wife, and daughter, who has personally experienced significant health challenges, I get it. Staying focused on ourselves takes persistence. I want everyone to know that it is not only doable but life is better when we live by the ethos of puttting our own oxygen mask on first.
In general, I’m an introverted person. I’m good at discussing topics I’m passionate about like Aikido and women’s health in groups, but I’ve never been a champion of an idea or cause. But there comes a time when you realize that whispers won’t foster the impact you want to have. So, I’ve decided to expand how I share my knowledge and experiences. No, I’m not shouting from rooftops but I am finding my voice.
Without fail, imposter syndrome whispers that I’m not cut out for this work, every time I think about my new path. It’s like a cloud passing by. Some days, the cloud casts a small shadow, and other days, it overwhelms me with a torrential rainstorm. The forces send me back into my comfort zone for cover.
It’s a bit like having a mischievous gremlin in your mind, armed with a “You’re Not Good Enough, What Do You Think You’re Doing?” banner. I’ve realized that if I can allow myself the feeling of doubt and simultaneously remind myself of my truth, the cloud only momentarily dims my confidence.
Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
I remember the first time I stood in front of 700 people to deliver a speech; my knees were shaking, and that nagging voice inside said, “Who do you think you are?” But I pushed through, and to my surprise, people smiled and approached me afterward to say thanks for my words. In that situation, I realized that public speaking wasn’t about being perfect but about being authentic. Imposter syndrome didn’t stand a chance. It’s like that moment when you realize the fear of your first airplane or boat trip is scarier than the ride itself.
Sometimes, I turned to Aikido to shake off those feelings of inadequacy. Instead of delivering a predetermined volume of attack, at River Of Ki Aikido, we attack with strength and speed that matches the growth level of our partners. So, being on the mat with fists and sticks coming my way has taught me to get out of my head and into my body. To respond instinctively rather than overthinking. To trust that the person I have become is enough to be present with the tough stuff life will bring my way.
Fortunately, what I learn on the martal arts mat stays with me no matter where I go. My training reminds me that all I need to do in tough times is to show up fully versus trying to transform into someone else. All I need to do is choose to be the best version of myself every time. Just like Maya Angelou and Michelle Obama, who faced imposter syndrome head-on, we all can use our inner strength to light our path instead of fumbling in the dark.
Another key to overcoming imposter syndrome lies in distinguishing fear from my truth. Fear makes me feel queasy, while the truth of me is grounding and reassuring. When in doubt, I ask questions out loud to myself or speak my fear with someone I trust. Hearing myself speak about myself in ways I know aren’t true often helps me realize that imposter syndrome is in the house, causing my chaos. How do you differentiate between your inner fears and the reassuring truth? Who do you turn to for support when imposter syndrome pays a visit?
You know, imposter syndrome loves to play tricks on your mind. It makes us question our abilities and worthiness. To counter those negative thoughts, I started paying attention to more reliable evidence of my worthiness, Google reviews from clients who have appreciated my help and support. Their words of gratitude and trust and the tangible results they achieved from our work together, become my armor against imposter syndrome’s attacks. I regularly look at those reviews, photos, and cards I have received over the years. They give me a little boost of validation around my usefulness and value to others. It turns out I do make a difference, and no impostor feelings can take that away from me.
We all receive recognition or praise but often choose to ignore it. Let’s change that up. Pull your mementos and acknowledgments out of the drawers and boxes. Please place them in prominent places so you can see them without effort. That way, when imposter syndrome tries to convince you that you haven’t truly earned trust and respect, it’s easy to access proof and quiet the disruptive noise.
My journey with imposter syndrome has been and continues to be a rollercoaster. I often swing back and forth between self-doubt and triumph. I’m about 90% sure that I’m not an impostor at the time of this writing. Instead, I’m a courageous woman who continually learns, grows, and evolves. I navigate it with humor, self-awareness, and the knowledge that I am my best self, ready to share and help others along the way.
Remember, you’re not alone in this journey, and together, we can face imposter syndrome’s doubts head-on and emerge stronger.
One of our goals is to help like-minded folks with similar goals connect and so before we go we want to ask if you are looking to partner or collab with others – and if so, what would make the ideal collaborator or partner?
Not only am I ready to share with a broader audience, but I’m also excited to partner with people who share a passion for fostering a smother life experience for busy working women.
I am curating a league of health and wellness educators, speakers, and teachers who understand busy working women’s lives. Specifically, women who want to feel mentally and physically stronger but are confused by the complexity of self-care and don’t think they have the time.
If you love teaching women how to simplify health and well-being, especially women between the ages of 45-65, I look forward to speaking with you. Please don’t hesitate to reach out.
Even if you don’t have a passion for women’s health but resonate with what you have read, I look forward to speaking with you. Meeting new people and seeing where the synergy takes us is always great.
Scheduling link https://calendly.com/strengthvitalityaccelerator/10-minute-discovery-call-with-cara-michele
Partnership brochure https://calendly.com/strengthvitalityaccelerator/10-minute-discovery-call-with-cara-michele
If you are a busy working woman who is tired of the frustrating ups and downs of the health and wellness rollercoaster, here is a four-minute quiz for you. After answering the 25 questions, I’ll send over personalized suggestions on how to generate mental and physical energy more consistently.
We can even hop on a 15-minute follow-up call if you would like.
I look forward to speaking with you, and thanks for your time and listening.
In partnership,
Cara-Michele
Contact Info:
- Website: https://strengthvitalitywellness.com/
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strengthvitalitywellness/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/cmnether
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/cara-michele-nether-781865155/
- Twitter: https://www.facebook.com/strengthvitalitywellness
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrengthVitality
Image Credits
Cara-Michele Nether
