Meet Carrie Lehman

We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Carrie Lehman a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.

Hi Carrie , appreciate you sitting with us today to share your wisdom with our readers. So, let’s start with resilience – where do you get your resilience from?

While I don’t always like to bring this up because it’s deeply personal – I’d be lying if I didn’t talk about my sobriety and the doors it’s opened for me since. I hesitate to talk about it because it’s only a small part of who I am. It doesn’t define me – it’s one of many pieces and layers that comprise my make-up – but then on the other hand, I know it is the most important decision I’ve ever made in my life and has allowed me to evolve into the person I am today.

Resiliency is defined as the capacity to withstand or to recover quickly from difficulties. It’s a toughness. An elasticity. An ability to cope or adapt to challenging circumstances. Sobriety forced me to examine all the parts of myself that I didn’t like. To face the ugly and accept it rather than run from it. Sobriety revealed difficult and raw truths but in exchange taught me that it’s never too late to change for the better.

We have become conditioned to numb or try to escape the hardships life hands us. I had to train myself to deal with discomfort head-on and without armor. In the early days of sobriety I remember feeling like every nerve of my body was exposed and the urge to dull that was intense. But sobriety taught me that those feelings – like all feelings – are temporary. I learned that each second of each day matters and all of those moments add up to a bigger picture. One minute at a time. One hour at a time. One day at a time. I learned that I can endure even the worst of the worst. Sadness. Grief. Disappointment. Humiliation. Getting sober stripped me of false sheathing and in its place grew true self-protection and courage.

My husband once told me “a coward dies a thousand deaths, a hero dies but once.” That really spoke to me and so I try and enter each day with a blank slate, a fresh page, and know that whatever trials come my way, I can handle it. It’s all temporary and “this too shall pass”.

Thanks, so before we move on maybe you can share a bit more about yourself?

Many years ago I began fantasizing about driving around an old-fashioned pick-up truck – an aqua blue Ford- traveling the country & acquiring antique things that only certain people wanted. I would put these things in a store and arrange them to tell a story. I’ve had this vision for as long as I can remember.

I’ve had other lofty dreams through the years including being a guitar player, a best-selling author and earning a doctorate in Psychology- sporting a medium length bob and smart tortoise shell reading glasses that I mindlessly, yet gracefully would move on off the bridge of my nose with easy sophistication while listening to clients.

But one of these “bucket list” desires continued to nag at me while the others were comfortably shelved one by one.

The vintage pick-up truck.
The store.

25 years ago my mom and I began going to flea markets and estate sales. She and I rarely reached for the same thing, but found interest in each other’s tired looking but still-thriving objects. We adored these pieces of history. Treasures with pasts. Worn covers of books and paintings with cracked gesso frames. I felt drawn to anything with flowers. Everything with flowers.
I bought a primitive farm table for $2.50 at an estate sale and thought I won the lottery at 25 years old. That table greeted guests in my foyer for 18 years.

I ran my fingers over hand carved wood and felt the softness of alabaster marble. I drooled over squeaky dovetailed drawers and rusty ornate pulls. I longed for a life where each day could be spent wondering who sat at old kitchen tables and how the Ironstone creamer became fissured. I felt like an old soul staring into the eyes of women who sat for portraits, and then photos. What was life like for them? How can I preserve their story? Guesses became facts as ordinary things took on romantic roles.

Through the years I had handled lots of seemingly unremarkable or common goods originating from different decades – but to me, each find was enchanting.

Sometimes I wanted to own it all and pangs of hoarding and coveting sometimes made editing my selections impossible. I think there are other people who understand this longing. Anxiety almost -of knowing extraordinary things exist in the universe, but you haven’t had the opportunity to meet them yet. Sometimes it feels like running a race without knowing who or what is awaiting you at the finish line.

I am a collector by nature. I can collect anything from pottery to glassware to Nike Air Jordans to MAC eyeshadows. I love grouping objects and when I find something out in the world that fits with something I already own, I weave them together to create a story. That’s what a vignette does when styled right. It peaks interest and engages a person in an artistic way.

But it’s hard to do this in one’s
home over years and years. Few have the space or time to do this as a full-time hobby. The room runs out. The funds run out and sometimes it can feel overwhelming just living among your “stuff”. Collections can sometimes begin to feel heavy or burdensome. Or even junky. There is a fine line between collecting and amassing things out of compulsion. That’s why I always felt a store was a solution to the need to create, marvel & appreciate, then disassemble and begin again.

I was right.

The last few years of owning my antique home decor shop have been pure joy. I’m not driving an old Ford pick up truck yet. I still hope to. But I’m out there. I’m out there cruising highways, picking and sourcing, creating and SHARING. That’s the best part. Finally sharing my passion and connecting with others thru beautiful found artifacts.

If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?

I think what has been most impactful in my journey is actually bigger than any quality I possess and that is the love and support of family. I couldn’t do anything without the loyalty and selflessness of my husband, kids and parents. Without them, there is no business.

Beyond that I think being someone who believes in themself and the product I am putting out there is integral. I consider my craft to be artistic in nature and when you are an artist there is fear in putting yourself out there in a way that leaves you open and vulnerable to others opinions. Without confidence, I would have never taken the vision and made it a reality. I would have kept the ideas locked in my head – never brave enough to share them with an audience.

I believe in order to start and run a small business you must be a risk-taker. The odds are not really in favor of small businesses. It’s difficult to compete with big box retailers and to create a niche that makes you stand apart from others. Many people do what’s comfortable and rely on convenience for their own needs. I definitely am a specialty shop. Not everyone likes vintage and antiques nor do they appreciate the time and effort that goes into to sourcing and styling. They would rather go to Target or Home Goods than seek out a small business to support. I have taken on a financial risk as well. Sometimes it scares me to realize how much stuff I personally own. There is a lot of cash tied up when starting out and you can’t predict whether people will be drawn to your ideas and aesthetic. I often thought…ok now I have all of this stuff! The question is…will it sell? Can I profit? Is this sustainable over time? It’s a huge risk to put yourself out there. I’m actually breaking into hives right now just talking about it haha.

This brings me to the third quality which is passion. My passion for this line of work became so overwhelming that literally nothing could stop me. Once I decided to make my hobby a business the fervor for the job drove me to do the rest. I feel I’m drowning in devotion and love for what I do. There isn’t one part of the business that feels like work. I really mean that. My brain is constantly buzzing and racing with ideas and my obsession with creating has made my dedication easy.

All the wisdom you’ve shared today is sincerely appreciated. Before we go, can you tell us about the main challenge you are currently facing?

The number one obstacle is definitely that my business has one employee and that employee is me! Again because the nature of what I do is artistic it’s hard for me to articulate my needs to anyone. It all kind of lives in my head and that can be a messy sometimes chaotic place. It often feels like I’m the only person who can get the job done so I do it ALL. Sourcing, picking, transporting, moving, cleaning, restoring, styling, pricing and sales.

I also feel like the shop is my canvas and I’m not comfortable with anyone else’s brush doing the creating. BUT if I could hire one person it would be someone to go fetch all the big pieces of furniture for me. I’m not very good at driving box trucks! I have been outsourcing some deliveries but when you are a small business, every dollar spent is a big deal so I end up just saying, “I can do it!”

I do have a good friend who helps with social media and she is brilliant. She is the only person I don’t have to explain anything to. She just gets it. She’s been an angel.

Contact Info:

• Instagram: @foxglove.dreams