Meet Charity Jones

 

We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Charity Jones. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with CHARITY below.

Hi CHARITY, really happy you were able to join us today and we’re looking forward to sharing your story and insights with our readers. Let’s start with the heart of it all – purpose. How did you find your purpose?

Each of us arrives in this world with mental and emotional preset wiring that makes us completely unique. We are born into unique family dynamics that radically shape our presets. These two things: Nature and Nurture, create the base foundation of who, and how, we will become. In my case, I was born -neurodivergent, hyper creative, and intuitive – into a large, religious, creatively rich, and financially poor family. We were all musicians and artists – all ten of us. There were too many children for my parents to really focus on any of us very much. They tried, but they simply couldn’t give all 8 children what we needed to thrive. We all had to share the limited space in our four bedroom home, so none of us had real privacy. That many people living that close together is very difficult, and my parents prioritized group harmony over personal boundaries to try to maintain some sanity. My mother homeschooled us, and taught private music lessons on the side when she could, My father worked a dead end blue collar job. Money was an issue of tension, fear and scarcity. Humor masked the fear with fun, and creativity distracted from the poverty. But they were always lurking right around the corner.

I understood that, if I wanted life to be interesting, enjoyable, and beautiful, I had to make it those things myself. I also understood that if I didn’t Work to make life those things, it would not be interesting, enjoyable, or beautiful. I was very young when I decided to make that intentional work my life goal. It was bigger than art or music. It was a determination to remake everything into beauty and creativity; The way I ate breakfast, took a walk, thought about things. The possibilities were endless.

What I didn’t understand was that my home environment had taught me to believe my personality, needs, and life, were not as important as other peoples’ personalities, needs, and lives. If I didn’t prioritize family harmony above myself there were painful consequences. My parents spanked us if we caused conflict. I was spanked more than my other siblings – I guess I had a harder time giving up my autonomy. But I eventually resigned myself and stopped taking up space. I learned to live in the cracks of other people’s lives, rather than crafting my own. Around the age of nine I modified my life goal. I would do everything I could to make other people’s lives beautiful, enjoyable, and interesting. In doing so, I accepted that my life was less deserving of good things than other people’s lives. Accepting that belief was very painful and rather than feel the pain, I disconnected from myself. I spent several decades of my life in a dissociative state convinced that I was worthless.

It took getting married, having children, and then losing the family I had worked so hard to build, for me to face the negative belief I had internalized. Then it took a lot of hard work to alter that belief. I had to forgive myself for believing I was worthless, and start the intimidating work of allowing myself to take up space, and heal.

Through all of this process, I was honing my skills in various artistic fields. I got a degree in music, studied art, found an affinity for oil pastels, started developing my surreal style of drawing, painted a lot of large murals, dabbled in graphic design, took a lot of commissions, ran a small music program, and built a small fashion/tailoring business.

The story of my development as an artist is just the story of me making peace with my fears, my trauma, and my self. I capture the details of that story in my surreal drawings. My paintings are more about expression through color. But in everything I do, I strive to reach a deeper beauty, and I hope that my focus helps my clients to reach for it too.

Appreciate the insights and wisdom. Before we dig deeper and ask you about the skills that matter and more, maybe you can tell our readers about yourself?

As a career creative, I’ve worn many hats. I have tried a lot of creative pursuits, sewing, tailoring, fashion design, sculpting, singing, drawing, painting, jewelry making, interior design, and product design. With every new skill I added to my resume, I had one goal: to master the creative form in order to make everything around me interesting and beautiful.

Currently I have an etsy shop where I sell jewelry, I have a website where my art is available for purchase or private commission, I do tailoring and alterations, and I work privately with clients to create bespoke fashion to suit their unique styles. To set up a consultation, or talk about a commission, you can message me on Instagram.

If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?

Determination and creative thinking are necessary for developing your personal life and professional business. Without those qualities I wouldn’t have kept practicing my art. When I faced obstacles, I didn’t give up. When things didn’t go the way I had hoped or planned, I adjusted and came up with new solutions. Building any career requires these skills.

I’ve also found that communication skills are crucial for successfully connecting with clients, and running a small business.

These skills require practice, and take time to develop. For a lot of artists, the very sensitive temperment that makes them good at what they do, also makes it very hard to master these skills. It requires patience and a willingness to mess up and start over. So just keep doing what you’re doing, and don’t let self doubt or frustration get in your way.

What has been your biggest area of growth or improvement in the past 12 months?

In the last year I’ve been building a new life. That may sound a bit dramatic but it’s just how it is. My post pandemic divorce became much more contentious than I could have imagined possible, and I’ve been focusing mostly on caring for my children as they try to process the stressful new situation. It’s been tough on all of us, but I’ve learned a lot about asserting myself, making active choices, and facing my fears on a daily basis. I’d say the greatest area of growth for me has been in stress management. The key word is management – I don’t like managing things, it requires thinking ahead and strategizing, being patient, holding my tongue, doing things I don’t enjoy in order to get a larger goal acheived. But I’ve learned a lot about doing that this year.

Contact Info:

Image Credits

Vera Pashkevits

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