Meet Clara X. Roque-Wagner

We recently connected with Clara X. Roque-Wagner and have shared our conversation below.

Clara X. , we’re thrilled to have you on our platform and we think there is so much folks can learn from you and your story. Something that matters deeply to us is living a life and leading a career filled with purpose and so let’s start by chatting about how you found your purpose.

I was a very philosophical child. I remember questioning what the purpose of life was at a very young age. I remember that question bothering me for years because I could never find an answer that satisfied me. I have always been someone who looks for answers to very abstract questions and through my writing, I have been able to find a few. Writing is in my blood. I am a part of a lineage of poets. I think that’s why it is something that has felt so natural for me and easy. Growing up as a very socially anxious kid was difficult. Existing in my body was hard when I was constantly being verbally and emotionally abused by the adults around me as well as my peers. The life I lived was in my head; it was one I made up, a place that made me feel safe. I had friends there, I was talkative, full of wisdom I was willing to share. I was lonely in real life and made to feel like I was dumb because I didn’t act like the other kids. That’s when I started to write. I would tell stories about girls who looked like me, who could fly and go anywhere they wanted. They were strong with superpowers, living a life completely opposite to mine. As I got older and started taking my writing more seriously, I realized that writing allowed me to heal, ask questions and gain clarity. It has also turned me into a person I can hardly recognize. Through performing my poetry, being around other poets, and getting to be a part of a community I always dreamed of, I have found my purpose. My purpose is to write, to take up as much space as I can, to be loud, to heal, to dream, achieve, and to always, always continue growing.

Let’s take a small detour – maybe you can share a bit about yourself before we dive back into some of the other questions we had for you?

I currently have a book out! It is a collection of poetry called The Day the Flowers Bloomed. It carries themes like home, childhood, memories, and dreams. For the past two years, my focus has been writing my book, coming out with it, selling, performing, performing, performing, and continuing to write of course. Coming out with my first book and being integrated in the writing space/community, has brought me so many cool experiences. I can’t wait to see what else comes my way. Other than writing, I am also currently studying to become a birth doula. I am at the beginning stages of that but I have always been so fascinated with birth and the process of it. I think there is a calming presence in me that I have recently connected to and felt power in. I know it will be very beneficial towards creating a safe place for birthing people and that’s what I want to provide. There is a sense of calling that I feel from the universe to do this kind of work. It’s something I can’t always explain but I am following this instinct and seeing what comes from it. Right now, you can catch me reading at different coffee shops, art galleries, bookstores, etc. You can also find The Day the Flowers Bloomed on Daxsonpublishing.com as well as on Amazon, or find me and buy one from me personally!

There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?

A phrase that has stuck with me is, “closed mouths don’t get fed.” I find myself repeating that line in my head a lot which has changed the way I go about things. I am very ambitious and when I want or need something to happen, I tend to get it done. As someone who has struggled with finding their voice, it has been challenging to ask for things like support or resources, and going out of my way to be heard. What I do now is repeat that phrase a couple of times and go for what I want. With that, a lot of doors have opened even more. I have a lot of life to live still and more to learn but one thing I have realized is how important it is to be around people and find community outside of an every day routine like going to work. We live under capitalism so of course we have to work in order to survive and as difficult as it may be to find the energy to do anything else, it really is important to find fulfillment elsewhere. Especially in the age of social media. People are lonely but we need each other for our own survival. One quality that I am still practicing but that I think has really made an impact on me is being genuine and intentional with how I move in the world. For a long time, all I wanted was to be like everyone else. The words that came out of my mouth wouldn’t sound like me. I would mimic others in order to fit in. I realized that only made me miserable. As I’ve gotten older, I stopped caring as much about what people think or how they perceive me and I have never felt more like myself than I do now. One advice I can give is how important it is to self-reflect, heal from traumas, and keep on evolving as a person for the rest of our lives.

Before we go, maybe you can tell us a bit about your parents and what you feel was the most impactful thing they did for you?

I had the privilege of growing up in a two parent household. My parents are both educators and whatever knowledge they had, were passed along to my brother and I which I have grown to appreciate more as I’ve gotten older. They were also very outgoing, social people who had friends from all over the world. I have very fond memories of the parties they would have at home, people laughing, dancing to live music, eating food from all over. I was a kid surrounded by art and music and feel very lucky to have come from that. In elementary school, I think my parents noticed how much I was struggling. Together they agreed to send me to live at my grandmother’s house in Oaxaca. I had grown up visiting my family in Mexico during summer break but this time, I would be integrated into every day life, go to school, learn how to make tortillas from scratch. My parents hoped that being there would change me, that I would come back a different person. Though that wasn’t totally the case once I returned to the states, it did change the way I connected back to my roots and culture which is very ingrained in the way I exist today. I am super grateful to have had that experience because I have learned so much about myself through where I come from.

Contact Info:

• Instagram: titaximenaa
• Facebook: Clara Ximena