We recently connected with Corey Hennessey and have shared our conversation below.
Corey, we’re so excited for our community to get to know you and learn from your journey and the wisdom you’ve acquired over time. Let’s kick things off with a discussion on self-confidence and self-esteem. How did you develop yours?
Here’s the thing. I’m an actor. I have trainings and shows and improvisations and experiences on stage that are mind-bogglingly wild and fun and wacky and weird and so far outside of how I present myself that I often wonder how I found that character at all. Finding a character takes skills: listening, analysis, awareness, patience, resilience, repetition, and so many more. And I am good at these skills. I already knew I was a good actor. And even moreso, I believed was good actor. And yet, I was holding these skills completely separate from the rest of my life. I knew I could be confidence and I knew that I was not at the confidence level I wanted to be at (awareness), but I didn’t yet know how to get there.
What I hadn’t applied was that everything I had learned and honed as an actor could be applied to the other areas of my life. Confidence is a character, it is a mindset, and just like any other character, I needed to discover, and develop, and hone him into being. And sure, just like any ill-fitting costume, he was uncomfortable to wear at first, but with practice, repetition, setting small goals, and identifying my most core values, soon I started to understand what confidence meant for me to wear. (And this is important because my idea of confidence is different that someone else’s idea of confidence.)
And sometimes, confidence is still uncomfortable to wear because sometimes I get him mixed up with bragging or headiness or exuberance or something else, so I remember what are my values, what do I stand for, and I take action in light of those.
My confidence comes from my core, and my trust that even though it can be scary, being truthful to my values and my goals is more important than faking my way into a false life.
Thanks for sharing that. So, before we get any further into our conversation, can you tell our readers a bit about yourself and what you’re working on?
I help creatives and creative professionals get unstuck so they can avoid burnout and find balance in their many lives. In this process, I also help with increasing confidence and shifting how they show up in the world. As a coach, my only goal is to help my clients reach their goals and so I act as a lantern holder, lighting up the paths we can take, but always allowing them to choose. I believe that the power of choice is one of our most precious and valuable assets and that we can learn to utilize it to better our lives and the lives of those around us.
My journey to being a (life) coach is wild. And so I’ll bottom-line: I was an actor. Then I was a caterer, then a college student, then a photographer and a barista and a singing server and then a grad student. Then I learned how to teach acting on the college level. Then I because a musician. And all the while I kept trying to find ways to get myself onto stable ground, even though I was leading a few very separated different lives: personal, artistic, work, etc. While being an adjunct has its drawbacks, I kept coming back, even though I was dissatisfied. I began taking classes during lockdown and eventually started a coaching certification training. It was during this that i realized I kept coming back to teaching acting because it lit up my values of being of service. The transformations I saw in my students from the beginning to the end of the semester were breathtaking. They were like whole new people. And I wanted to be able to help others do that outside of the classroom. So I got myself certified through the International Coaching Federation (which means I’ve completed all the training and practice hours), starting teaching the coaching classes I had just completed, and I began Rhu Coaching.
And Rhu Coaching allows me to help those searching to get unstuck. As a creative, I understand what it is like to have multiple lives, and this made me feel stretched too thin and compressed into a box all at once. The balanceI mentioned above that I help with allows my clients to start integrating their lives, so they don’t feel so fragmented. I recently launched my Balance the Scales two month program and also my Quick Rebalance for those unsure if coaching is for them to try out a quick session and walk away with their values.
Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
1. Take inventory of your skills: I had all of these skills that I had honed for a life on stage and yet I wasn’t using them in the other areas of my life. In fact, the thought didn’t even cross my mind until sometime when I was in grad school, and even then it took a long time for me to start utilizing them. even if you don’t consider yourself a creative, you have a lot of skills that you’ve honed because they feel right to you. There are so many paths for you out there, even if your skills might be less traditional. Taking inventory of your skills can help clarify my next point.
2. Figure out what brings you joy and what lights up your core values:
Life is full of ups and downs, so I’m not suggesting that we can live an entirely blissed out life because we figure out what brings us joy. But knowing what brings us joy and what lights up our core values gives like a beacon to follow, a lighthouse in a storm, to guide us back to land when the waves of life get a bit too choppy.
This will also help when we are attempting to make big changes (a new job, a new relationship, a new location, etc.)
3. Trust your intuition:
I, for a long time, made decisions through logic, much like a Vulcan, processing the pros and cons, good and bad, right and wrong, of any decision. But rarely did I check in with how I was feeling about it, even when the feeling was overwhelming. Our intuition (or inner voice or conscious or knowing or however you want to call it) speaks simply but powerfully. Start finding ways to clue in and listen more to that inner voice. We cannot always base our decisions on our intuition, but getting into the practice of listening and allowing that voice to have a say will start you on the path to your most authentic self.
What do you do when you feel overwhelmed? Any advice or strategies?
Overwhelm is so common for me! I have a friend who I have traded coaching sessions with to get practice hours in and almost every time I started with “I’m overwhelmed.” So here’s how to break it down:
1. Identify that you are overwhelmed: Name it to tame it. It sounds obvious, but we need to be aware that we are overwhelmed before we can start doing anything about it. So many times I didn’t know I was overwhelmed until I started rambling on and on about the zillion things in my brain! (This leads to the next thing.)
2. List out everything on your mind or on your docket: This can be orally or on paper, computer, white board, whatever. And be truthful and specific. Include everything ranging from big to small, deadlines at work to keeping up your fitness schedule to making the bed to making this list. Sort out the big items from the small items.
3. Organize: Then, identify which things you can take care of right now. Prioritize them: What can I do right now? What can I do soon? What items need something else done first? Which are long-term and don’t need to take up mental energy in this moment?
4. Take action: Do the items that can be done in that moment. Start the soon items. Prep for the long-term items. And if this is still a bit much, take a break first. Because that organization step was also taking action! And remember, do this in your style. Add, edit, or alter anything in this to fit how you best need to get it done!
Contact Info:
- Website: www.rhucoaching.com
- Instagram: @rhucoaching
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/coreyhennessey/
Image Credits
All images: Corey Hennessey
