We were lucky to catch up with Denise Casey recently and have shared our conversation below.
Denise, we’re so excited for our community to get to know you and learn from your journey and the wisdom you’ve acquired over time. Let’s kick things off with a discussion on self-confidence and self-esteem. How did you develop yours?
A wise mentor once told me, “Often, you are the smartest person in the room. So, walk in knowing that fact.”
As a child, I had freckles, which made me a target for childhood jokes. This made me very insecure and really led me to become severely introverted. So, for most of my primary school years, I kept to myself and labeled myself as “shy.” Of course, these labels did not encourage high self-esteem and so I didn’t make many friends in school and wasn’t very popular in school either. Because of this, I decided to go to college where my cousin was enrolled so that I could have a familiar person on campus with me.
In college, my self-esteem improved some, but I was still very introverted. However, I did meet my future husband and children’s father in college. We met my senior year and were married 4 years after I graduated. We had our first child a year later. When I was pregnant with our second child, my job was downsized and I was laid off. As you can imagine, my hormones while pregnant and being laid off sent me into full depression once I delivered the baby. At the time, I wasn’t aware that I was depressed, but I definitely was. I stopped going around my family and really stayed in bed until I had no choice except to get up. I’ve always been the person that once my mind is made up, I am determined to complete the assignment no matter what. So, that’s what I did. I determined this to be the lowest point of my life and if it had not been for the help of my family and my sister who moved in with me to help with the kids, I don’t know that I would have made it out of this depressed state. I don’t really know when or how, but one day I decided to not remain in the state that I was in. I started a travel business, took and passed the SC insurance license exam, and started waiting tables at Olive Garden. I also enrolled in nursing school during this time. During this pivotal time in my life, I gained so much insight on who I was as a person, which helped to build my self-esteem. I remember as a nursing student, having one of my instructors comment on a presentation in my senior year that, it was the most she had heard me talk during the entire time that I was in nursing school. This is a testament to the remarkable growth I made during those 2 short years.
When my mentor told me the quote at the beginning of this article, I was working in insurance sales. At the time, I was also going through major life changes. I had just had my second child, going through a divorce and was laid off from my job. So, say that I had low self-esteem, and low confidence is truly and understatement. He spent hours with me building my knowledge of insurance, which helped to build my confidence in the industry. He invested in me because he saw potential. Of course, my success also ensured his success but the time that he spent with me teaching me the basics of selling were priceless and was the catalyst for shaping me into the person I am today. From that point on, I realized that people do business with people who are genuine and people that they like. So, it was my job to show them both when I approached them for sales. I also learned that the people who like and love me will like and love me no matter what mistakes I make in life. While I felt like a complete failure when I lost my job and got the divorce, my family and friends never stopped loving me and supported me through it all. This realization helped me to know that my life has worth. Knowing that worth is all the confidence that I need to face each day head on and tackle any obstacles that come my way!
Thanks for sharing that. So, before we get any further into our conversation, can you tell our readers a bit about yourself and what you’re working on?
I am the past president of Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Incorporated® Omega Tau Omega Chapter, which is an organization that serves the community needs of Upper York County South Carolina. I serve in various capacities currently, both locally and regionally. I am also a member of The Links, Incorporated® Piedmont (NC) Chapter. My business is Literary Creations & Critiques, which is responsible for editing and creating literary works.
Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
3 Most Important Qualities, Skills, Areas of Knowledge – Tenacity, Hope, and Ambition. I think it takes ambition to dream, tenacity to not allow your dreams to be deferred or derailed, and hope to continue to pursue your dreams no matters the obstacles that come your way.
To close, maybe we can chat about your parents and what they did that was particularly impactful for you?
My parents, George and Patsy Casey, have always instilled in my brother, sister, and me an unwavering dedication to community service. We watched our parents, both of which do not have college degrees, serve and lead organizations in the community from the time that we were little. Their examples of servant leadership helped to shape the woman that I am today, and their examples impact the decisions that I make daily. Therefore, it was never an option for me to just be a member of an organization. My parents are leaders, and they bred leaders. I have held leadership positions in organizations since Jr. High School and I am still serving the community in leadership roles now, including in my profession.
Image Credits
Ameera Images
