Meet Desteny Tolbert

We recently connected with Desteny Tolbert and have shared our conversation below.

Desteny, so great to have you with us and thanks for taking the time to share your thoughts with the community. So, let’s jump into something that stops so many people from going after their dreams – haters, nay-sayers, etc. We’d love to hear about how you dealt with that and persisted on your path.

When you have a burning passion for something, no amount of outside negativity can extinguish it. I persist despite those who doubt me because I’m not creating for them—I’m doing this for myself, for the inner child who always dreamed of making films, disappearing into imaginary worlds, and becoming an actress.

Growing up in a rough environment taught me early on that I couldn’t let others opinions dictate my path. Not every opinion matters. Constructive criticism is valuable, of course—I’m always open to learning and improving—but negativity serves no purpose. At the end of the day, I choose to focus on my craft, my growth, and my passion.

Also, when people doubt you, it’s often a sign of your own progression. Their doubt usually stems from their own insecurities—people can fear watching others succeed. Why? I don’t know. I wish the world were a kinder place, where instead of tearing each other down, we focused on uplifting and pushing one another toward our dreams and goals.

I used to be friends with people who weren’t truly supportive. I even had a friend tell me, ‘You wouldn’t be a good actress. I don’t see your career going anywhere if you became one.’ That crushed me. It discouraged me and broke my heart.

But a few years later, here I am—booking back-to-back feature films, working with incredible directors, crew, and actors, experiencing and learning from everyone’s unique stories. I’ve built lifelong friendships and contributed to creating powerful visions that we, as a team, bring to life as a gift to the writer. It’s amazing.

I chose myself and my creative voice despite the doubt. I can’t imagine a different life, and I’m grateful I didn’t let that friend’s doubt, or anyone’s doubt, get the best of me.

Thanks for sharing that. So, before we get any further into our conversation, can you tell our readers a bit about yourself and what you’re working on?

Hi, I’m Desteny Tolbert, an actress and theatre arts major based in California. My journey in acting started with a deep love for storytelling—bringing characters to life, stepping into different worlds, and creating something that resonates with audiences. I’ve been fortunate to work on multiple feature films, student projects, and short films, constantly learning and growing with every role.

What excites me most about acting is the power it has to connect people—to make them feel seen, understood, or inspired. I love collaborating with directors, writers, and fellow actors to bring a vision to life, honoring the hard work that goes into every project.

I am also an actress with diagnosed ADHD and anxiety, and I’m a passionate mental health advocate. If there’s one thing I’d love for people to take away from my journey, it’s that dreams are worth chasing—no matter where you start. I’m just getting started, and I can’t wait to see what’s next.

And remember, a mental ‘disability’ diagnosis does not define you—embrace it as a strength and use it as your power.

There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?

Stay patient, keep honing your craft, and believe in yourself—even when others don’t. Growth takes time, but persistence makes all the difference. The industry comes with rejection, doubt, and setbacks, but keep going, learn from every experience, and don’t let negativity define you. Whether it’s adjusting to different roles, directions, or challenges, being flexible and open to change is key. Stay curious, always be willing to learn, and most importantly, be kind and true to yourself.

Thanks so much for sharing all these insights with us today. Before we go, is there a book that’s played in important role in your development?

A book that has played a significant role in my development is The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron. It has been a huge influence on my creative journey, especially in terms of breaking through blocks and embracing my artistry with more authenticity.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.destenytolbert.net/
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thisisdesteny/
• Twitter: https://x.com/destenycalls

Image Credits

Nikola Tenzera
https://npcfotos.com/portfolio
Screencaps from short films: For The Record, After Hours, Twenty