Meet Donna Jenson

We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Donna Jenson. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Donna below.

Thanks, so before we move on maybe you can share a bit more about yourself?

I found the seed to my purpose at age thirty-three. In the decade leading up to that awakening I was building grassroots women’s centers within the Women’s Liberation Movement of the 70’s and ‘80’s. A defining moment was ignited in a customer line of a local delicatessen. Several steps ahead of me was a large swaying, obviously inebriated, middle-aged man. I was overtaken with the need to turn around and leave without placing my order.

Later that day, I retold this story within my women’s support group, shaking and wondering why I had swiftly exited the shopping line. That wondering evolved into a query about my alcoholic father and what could have been going on within myself to run from the deli. Ultimately it was about all the buried pain and shame I’d been holding since my childhood experience of incest at the hands of my father and the absence of protection from my mother.

The deli incident happened shortly after my divorce of ten years with my first husband as my daughter reached the age I was when my incest began – at seven years old. The combination of personal freedom from the marriage, the proximity of a little girl like I had been, and a nurturing women’s support system was fertile ground for my heart to open to the healing I needed.

I dedicated myself to the work of healing through peer counseling, therapy, yoga, acupuncture, cranial sacral and EMDR therapies, and building a strong supportive family of choice – often saying, “I gotta get this gunk out of me.” Gunk being all the unresolved suffering I was carrying.

Only those close to me knew of my experience, the “secret” I held, the truth I had been hiding from myself and my family. Time and again my father’s command, after every assault, “You tell anyone, and I’ll kill you,” would resound in my mind. This requirement to not tell became as insidious as the crime itself. Eventually, I realized I absolutely had to tell if I was going to rise to a deeper level of healing; to find my voice and use it to break the silencing engulfing my spirit.

It became clear to me that I wanted, no HAD, to find ways to support and encourage other survivors to break the silence as well, for themselves, for each other and for our whole culture. That purpose I found in 1995 remains the same to this day.

I turned to the arts to find my voice as a survivor and help others to do the same. Instead of my well-known social change activities through grass roots organizing I suspected that it would be through the arts that hearts and minds could be changed regarding childhood sexual abuse. Little did I know how enormous my own healing would be furthered by participating in this “artmaking” for change.

First, I wrote a one-woman play depicting what it was like growing up in a sexually abusive family; what one woman experienced to reclaim her life and make it worth living. My play, What She Knows: One Woman’s Way Through Incest to Joy, took seven years to write. I brought in a master guitarist, John Sheldon, who wrote a beautiful soundtrack. He accompanied me in every performance of our 11-year run, closing with his riveting song that reflected the main theme of the play, It Wasn’t Your Fault. Listen to it here.

In 2008 I founded a non-profit project, Time To Tell, through the fiscal sponsorship of Fractured Atlas to provide a platform offering healing through the arts for survivors. I pulled together a thinktank to create a mission which remains intact to this day: Sparking stories from lives affected by incest and sexual abuse to be told and heard.

After viewing a performance we did in Miami, my daughter, Jennifer, announced, “Mom, you have to write a book about your life!” I smiled back at her, silently telling myself, ‘Not likely’. But she and a few other dear hearts in my life were persistent enough that I took the challenge. My book, Healing My Life from Incest to Joy, was published by Levellers Press in 2017. I would narrate the audiobook version in 2023, published by Audible.

In 2019, I launched the online Time To Tell Writing Circles for survivors. Buried under our traumas there runs a deep wellspring of creativity and joy waiting to be tapped within a circle of survivors writing together. Our circle format is designed to foster both personal exploration and the creation of community with an amalgamation of two primary activities:
1. Writing and reading our narratives to each other.
2. Mindfulness practices such as focused breathing and gentle yoga stretches.

We follow a set of group guidelines that hold our space together. Writing prompts are offered, and participants write within the safe container of the group. We then honor each other’s voices by actively listening to each member reading aloud what they have just written. This act of listening, to one’s own words as well as each other’s, confirms and affirms that what each narrator has to say is worthy of our undivided attention. And when the narrator hears feedback about what has stayed with them from a piece of their writing, they are given the profound message that their voice has been received, heard, and honored. The tech moderator of each circle creates a digital collage from the writings and sends it to the members.

In response to the Me Too Movement my article, Are We Making Headlines or Headway, was Published by MS Magazine 2019.

I placed second in the Western Mass. 2021 Story Slam performing We Tiptoed Back. Telling the story of my 25-year heartbreaking journey of losing the majority of my biological family for disclosing, and the ultimate miracle of reuniting with my beloved niece, Melisa.

I co-produced Survivors’ Voices: Works of Resilience Written and Read by Survivors of Childhood Sexual Abuse, a virtual weekend event to share original writing regarding people’s experiences of childhood sexual abuse and their paths of healing. The audience was filled with community and family members as well as professionals who work with survivors. I then edited the anthology which is comprised of all the readings. Survivor’s Voices was published by Levellers Press in 2021.

In 2022 I curated VISIONS FROM OUR VOICES: A Collage Exhibit Depicting Survivor Narratives comprised of fifteen 12” x 12” collages from the TTT Writing Circles. The exhibit takes viewers on an emotional journey, offering a window into the profound healing power of storytelling and art. The exhibit invites visitors to immerse themselves in the narratives, emotions, and symbolic representations embedded within each collage. Where possible, writing workshops are offered in conjunction with the exhibition.

I began offering an interactive continuing education workshop for therapists and social workers with my colleague Reena Bernards, LCMFT in early 2023. Its title is Helping Survivors to Heal from Sexual Trauma: An Attachment Approach. Its groundbreaking nature of being co-led by a clinician and a leader in the survivor movement offers participants theories and techniques not only to help survivors but also to address therapist self-care to prevent secondary traumatization.

Then I produced the documentary “Telling is Healing,” which features excerpts from my play in conversation with an ally, Susanne Beck. The film highlights the importance of healthy relationships with non-survivors.

Currently, I am producing a video podcast titled “Healing Conversations,” where I will be in dialogue with survivors about the ways we have healed and, most importantly, what has changed or been added to our lives through our healing journeys.

Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?

The three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful on my journey have been persistence, humor, and love.

My dedication to persist is founded on my strong belief that healing is possible as is the breaking of the silence surrounding sexual abuse at all levels. Since I started this journey, I realized I would be rejected and should still keep going – and so I do. It’s a quality that not only makes me a good organizer but also a good friend.

There was a great lack of humor growing up in my home environment, given the presence of alcoholism and abuse. But every year, I visited my maternal grandparents’ farm, where joy lived. I have vivid memories of being passed around the laps of my grandmother, mother, and her two sisters, where the air was filled with laughter. The first time I heard it and felt the buoyancy of their spirits, I was elated and began searching for laughter. It became the deciding factor for every relationship I built from then on. I came to understand that laughing out loud, sincerely and often, is extremely medicinal. And it’s served me very well – all this laughing.

So, is love a quality, a skill, or a form of knowledge? Probably all three and more. To love and be loved is, for me, what life is really all about. Likewise, I fill my life with places and experiences that I love. To do this requires lots of attention and awareness. I regularly check in with myself and ask: Am I loving where I am, what I’m doing, who I’m with? If not, something has to change – and the “something” is usually me. When needed I ask myself key questions: What conflict or lack do I need to address? What do I need to do to get back to feeling loving and lovable?

My advice for folks who are early on their journey is – first and foremost – be very kind and gentle with yourself. Healing from our traumas and working to find meaning in our lives takes a lot of work and time. Fortunately, there are many individuals and groups that can support and help us heal. Find them. When I started, I had a pie-in-the-sky idea that I would reach the end, be fully healed, and move on. About 20 years along the way, I realized I’d be healing till the day I die, and that’s okay. Because a bigger realization unfolded for me– healing is possible, and we can build a life worth living.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.timetotell.org
• Instagram: Time To Tell Instagram

Image Credits

DJ portrait by Lynn Graves