Meet Donna Vo Sotomayor

Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Donna Vo Sotomayor. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.

Donna, thank you so much for joining us today. Let’s jump right into something we’re really interested in hearing about from you – being the only one in the room. So many of us find ourselves as the only woman in the room, the only immigrant or the only artist in the room, etc. Can you talk to us about how you have learned to be effective and successful in situations where you are the only one in the room like you?

Growing up, I recall being one of the two or three Asian students in my elementary classrooms. I knew I didn’t look like the majority of my peers, but I didn’t really understand what that meant at the time. It wasn’t until middle school and high school that I started to understand and notice that the implications of what it meant to look different.

In my experience, it meant that I didn’t really fit in. I am grateful to be born and raised in Orlando, Florida where it is so diverse. However, in the schools that I went to, the majority of the students were either Latinx or White. To look different and not fit in meant that I wasn’t anyone’s crush because I wasn’t “their type.” I wasn’t popular because my parents didn’t come from money and buy me all the clothes that were trending. Even in the small Asian cliques that may have existed, I didn’t fit in because I was more American than them.

I think growing up in such a diverse place like Orlando has made me appreciate other cultures more. To this day, I don’t feel like I fit in and never have truly felt that way. I am learning that that is the beauty of being human. We are all unique individuals with different experiences and can come together to share those in community. I have learned that we share more in common than we think. Our own lived experiences is what make us who we are and we can use that as a source to connect and empower those around us.

Great, so let’s take a few minutes and cover your story. What should folks know about you and what you do?

I am a relationship therapist (official title is Registered Marriage and Family Therapist Intern in the state of Florida). I started my own private practice named Wallflower Counseling to create a safe, accessible, and relatable space for BIPOC Gen Z & Millennials. I see individuals and couples experiencing relational concerns, life transitions, anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem.

Wallflower Counseling is a part of the new generation of therapy. Meaning where therapists (hi – that’s me), show up as their authentic self, make facial expressions, and use the therapeutic relationship as one way of healing. In building my practice, I understand the need for accessible and quality mental health care. I never want to turn clients away because they can’t afford therapy. To make therapy affordable, I offer low cost and sliding scale options.

If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?

It is hard to narrow it down to three things but I would say empathy, openness, and knowing my own worth has been most impactful in my journey. I was recently told by my supervisor, Colette McLeod, that empathy isn’t exactly putting yourself in someone else’s shoes, but sitting with them in the midst of their feelings and without judgment. It is about being with and understanding the other person, not just their circumstances. In terms of openness, my advice is to stay curious. There is so much that is out of our control that we don’t really have a choice but to be open. You don’t know where one conversation will lead, or where life will take you next. Lastly, remember that who you are and what you know is valuable. You are worthy and do not settle for less than what you know you deserve.

Tell us what your ideal client would be like?

I work with BIPOC Gen Z & Millennial individual and couples who are experiencing relational concerns, life transitions, anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem. My ideal client is open and curious. They understand that therapy is a place for reflection and to look within. They are ready to do the work inside and outside of sessions. They are willing to explore their experiences, relationships, and show up authentically.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.wallflower-counseling.com/
• Instagram: @donna.mft