Meet Dr. Dustin Domingo

Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Dr. Dustin Domingo. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.

Hi Dr. Dustin, we’re so appreciative of you taking the time to share your nuggets of wisdom with our community. One of the topics we think is most important for folks looking to level up their lives is building up their self-confidence and self-esteem. Can you share how you developed your confidence?

This is an interesting question. There are still days I don’t feel my best. There are rooms where I don’t immediately feel I belong. But I know I’m so much more confident now than I was years ago. Part of developing my confidence and self-esteem is unlearning the idea that as a queer Filipino person, I’m not meant to be the one celebrated nor the one front and center. I think as I age though, I’ve learned that in order to be more confident, you have to practice pursuing and/or asking for things that feel unreasonable. It’s interesting because these unreasonable things aren’t so unreasonable. A thing feels unreasonable or unachievable until we do the thing. It’s more about taking up space and participating in projects that bring me joy.

Granted, it didn’t help that when growing up I never wanted to be an inconvenience to others. I was a notorious people pleaser. To be honest, that’s still a trait I’m working on reeling in. It takes practice.

Along the way though, as I challenge myself, I make mistakes, I learn, do better, and eventually amazing outcomes happen. I also learn how to manage uncomfortable feelings that are associated with failure or rejection. Maybe one of the more important life lessons I’ve learned is that an individual’s success is a community effort. As I try new things, I meet new people. I’ve met people who sincerely root for me. Not only are they cheering for my success, but they help me problem solve and they challenge me to reach new heights. All of these experiences and the human support systems I’ve built contribute to my feeling comfortable with the idea of discomfort. And as I continue to prove to myself that I can do things that I thought were unreasonable or impossible, my sense of self-efficacy just improves over time.

That’s where my confidence comes from. Trying. Failing. Trying again. And staying connected with people who also want me to succeed.

Thanks, so before we move on maybe you can share a bit more about yourself?

Sometimes it feels as though I’ve dabbled in opposing creative and professional endeavors. I’ve been an actor. I’ve been a semi professional singer who has performed across the country and released albums and original music. I’ve worked in education for about 15 years. I’ve studied society, leadership, and cultural competence in my master’s and doctorate programs. I’ve produced podcasts that feature Filipino (“MESEARCH”) and LGBTQIA+ (“The Stories We’re Proud to Share”) perspectives. I’ve published creative and academic writing in multiple books and blogs.

It seemed like I was jumping from one thing to another and this journey didn’t make much sense until recently. After a lot of reflection, I’ve come to realize the throughline here is this – I’m an artist, educator, and writer dedicated to documenting and sharing stories that belong to marginalized communities, especially LGBTQIA+ and Filipino people. All of the creative and professional work I’ve done somehow advances this mission. At the end of the day, I aim to create and maintain platforms that uplift those who are often unseen and unheard.

My most recent project is a book called, “With Love: What We Wish We Knew About Being Queer and Filipino in America.” This book features 68 letters by 50 LGBTQIA+ Filipinos written to their former selves to inspire, comfort, and empower. From conception to launch, this was more than a year in the making. I led this project and included my own analysis and narrative. Ultimately, after pouring over each letter, I was able to identify 10 common themes that are framed in this book as 10 life lessons that we Queer Filipino Americans wish to document and pass on.

To learn more about me and this book check out dustindomingo.com/withlove.

If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?

Looking back, the three areas of knowledge that were most impactful in my journey are encompassed in the following.

Community: As a young person, I thought success didn’t count unless I did it alone. The truth of the matter is that I’ve gone so much farther with friends and supporters in my corner. Mentors, advocates, teachers, networks, and loved ones. Whether I’ve liked it or not, I can always learn something from other people – valuable skills and lessons that will help me along the way. Those who truly want to see you succeed will go out of their way to help you reach higher levels of success if you let them. And arguably most importantly, the right people will introduce you to the right people. You can do a lot when your network is expansive. Let people show up for you.

Drive: Drive is the motivation to get through bumpy roads and over steep hills on our journey towards success. Being able to learn new skills and reach new levels of success first and foremost takes will and belief that you are capable even when things get hard. We can’t get to the good things unless we get through the hard things. Any skill that I’ve wanted to develop takes practice whether that’s interpersonal communication, singing, writing, or public speaking.

Grace: Anything we seek to achieve, whether our “thing” is related to art, religion, science, movies, sports and anything in between, at the end of the day, we do these things to enhance the human experience and our quality of life. Still, we are all human. We make mistakes. We may not live up to others’ expectations or the expectations we have for ourselves. We have to give ourselves grace; learn and move on. Others may not live up to our own expectations of them. Grace goes a long way if we seek to hold onto our relationships and/or peace.

Thanks so much for sharing all these insights with us today. Before we go, is there a book that’s played in important role in your development?

One of the most impactful books I’ve ever read was “The Artist’s Way” by Julia Cameron. This was a workbook that takes the reader through 12 weeks of reflective exercises to help them find their creative spark. Some valuable practices I learned from this book include “morning pages.” Morning pages refers to stream-of-consciousness writing every day. Journaling for up to 3 pages a day is a simple task that allowed me to clear my head of anything that was weighing on me mentally or emotionally. On difficult days, morning pages got me in the habit of identifying my feelings and reflecting on what was important to me that day. On the other side of the same token, morning pages helped me practice reflection and gratitude. It was a way to sort out the chaos of daily life, while also reminding me what was most important to me in those moments.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://dustindomingo.com
• Instagram: @itsdustindom
• Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/d-domingo/

Image Credits

Amer Quilala