Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to DRA. RAQUEL RUBIN. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.
DRA. RAQUEL , so glad you were able to set aside some time for us today. We’ve always admired not just your journey and success, but also the seemingly high levels of self-discipline that you seem to have mastered and so maybe we can start by chatting about how you developed it or where it comes from?
I love that you use the term self-discipline. I wonder how many people are aware of the difference between discipline and self-discipline. I certainly wasn’t aware of that difference while I studied biology nor when I studied dentistry. In both cases discipline was required to achieve them, however I wasn’t being self-disciplined and there were several times that I was sleep deprived. Self discipline is an essential building block of a concept that I love to talk about: self leadership. For me the formula is: self discipline plus mindset and values equals self leadership.
At the beginning of lockdown I started some videos with the goal to inspire others and they ended up to inspire me and allow me to develop my self discipline and strengthen my mindset in alignment with my values. Every time I was doing research to make a video I was choosing habits to get into my routine. At that time I already knew the importance of mindset to get different results. I had the opportunity to prove that many years before while my mom got sick and entered into the hospital.
I believe I have never said this out loud however, I am grateful that the lock down allows in a certain way for me to reflect and choose to overhaul my routine which habits to be more self discipline with and to consider that sometimes there was a possibility I was treating myself as a commodity. I ended up choosing to meditate twice a day more consistently and I added stretching which I believe with Qi Gong, energy medicine, conscious breathing, my gratitude and my I am journals are a game changer. I already had drinking water and a little bit of exercise.
Life challenges are part of the many possibilities we can face. Choosing in advance to be conscious and intentional in what to practice self discipline strengthens the immune system and increases the level of confidence.
Let’s take a small detour – maybe you can share a bit about yourself before we dive back into some of the other questions we had for you?
In a nutshell, think about me as an empowering mindset, leadership and transformation from the inside out. Former dentist and military leader fully fluent in Spanish with a vision of a world where people see themselves as leaders and get that the only way for humanity to truly evolve is understanding that we are all one and we always can do something no matter how small. Every day we have the privilege of being alive and the responsibility to review any beliefs that make us think that we are less than others or more than them. Survived two major hurricanes, one earthquake and helped my mom to go from almost dead and dialysis to recover and enjoy life again.
Looking back I was already a dentist when I started to take seminars on the self development pathway. Eventually I opened my dental clinic and I have a bigger desire to understand myself more because I perceived that by doing that I could understand my patients better. For example it puzzled me at that time why people with great dental insurance almost didn’t use it or what was behind some decisions my patients made. I started to read and learn more about human behavior and eventually in some way I shared my new knowledge with my patients. There was one moment that at the end of the day I looked at the reception room and saw a couple of patients that I had already treated and talked with. I was told they were waiting for me to talk about other ‘stuff’ totally unrelated with their treatments. There were even patients that asked my advice for very personal things. I considered writing a book about it.
While juggling different things in a short time I passed from doing things with the peace of mind my mom was healthy to receiving the news that my mom was in a coma with a couple of hours to live. Have you ever had a moment when you perceive that it is necessary to put your own life on pause? There I had it in front of me. Some decisions were needed and it was about life and death.
The operation was successful, however the doctor said that she was going to live in a bed, unable to walk, speak or have life as she used to. That was the moment that taught me the importance of choosing wisely who I accept as authority. I accepted that he kept treating her as her doctor and in my mind refused his authority about my mom’s destiny. I asked him what was the first exercise that I can give her to do. He said that in her state being seated was already an exercise, so every day while at the hospital I started to sit her at my side. Saying that she disliked it it’s an understatement. She was so mad with me, especially because she didn’t know who I was. Next phase was standing up and staying with her holding hands. Later I use her own love for music to sing to her at the same time that I invite her to walk. It felt so great. The road to recovery was full of surprises when it seemed that everything was going better she became a dialysis patient. I have never known someone on dialysis treatment able to get out, inside of me I have this intuition that it was possible. Again she underwent all the required treatment at the same time that we were doing everything for her to recover. She became the first person I knew that got out of dialysis treatment.
Depending on your beliefs you will say it was the hand of God or that it was a bold treatment given from someone who refused to let the doctors have the last word. Everything started with the desire for her to recover and the willingness to do whatever it takes. Different results require the development of a different mindset.
I used to have daily conversations with a friend about mindset, values, goals and after realizing the difference that all made in decisions, perceptions and actions we joined talents and wrote together a book in Spanish: El Vidajero Vive Haciendo lo que Ama with practical tools that allow you to expand your self leadership. We were aware that not everybody could take all the studies we were doing, however, the book was a powerful accessible tool available to those willing to put in the effort. In English the translation would be: The Traveler Trough Life Lives Doing what he Loves.
Even though I am a Military Officer Veteran I consider what happened to mom one of the toughest wars I faced. As a Speaker, author and consultant I love the opportunity to transform perspectives that find solutions and transform lives.
In case you are curious in pronouncing Dra. Raquel Rubín correctly Dra. is the abbreviation for female doctor in Spanish and it’s pronounce as dok·to·ra my last name Rubín it’s pronounce as Ru· been] As part of developing my self-leadership I chose to use the abbreviation in Spanish and the accent to honor my roots.
For some time already I have been experimenting with videos; some of them in English and others in Spanish where I take different magazines and I lay out them to create a meditation. There have been moments where some of the magazines have opposite points of view. I believe that part of self-leadership is to become aware of the degree of diversity and inclusion that our minds are willing to open. Thoughts are like seeds. Different seeds give different results; you would never expect an orange seed to give mangoes. You are the one who chooses which seeds or thoughts to nourish. When you become aware of your thoughts is like becoming aware of the seeds you are nourishing and that impact your interactions with others that may look and think like you or not. Be aware that something might look different than what you are used to and still have value and purpose.
You can have great seeds and great fruits and still have pests that damage the harvest. Indifference and hate are some of the pests that the garden of our minds could have learned, sometimes even from people who loved us and wanted to protect us from a perceived danger; that might be real or not, toward what is perceived as different.
If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?
I consider myself a lifetime learner and I know that has impacted in many ways my life each time I do my best to put into practice what I just learned. I love to see myself and believe that I am wisely perseverant. I realized we all persevere and the important thing is to develop the clarity to choose when to persevere and when it is time to shift gears. While studying biology there were moments that I wasn’t sure if it was wise to keep going. I was advised to quit and it was my love for dental medicine, which I consider a mix of art and science, that inspired me to keep going. I am grateful for my commitment to meditate. I remember I used to think that was a lot of time. Today I know it is as easy as starting to put on a one minute alarm and in that time admire the beauty of nature. The important thing is to give yourself the opportunity to reset your mind and experience little by little how your sphere of consciousness is expanding as well as your sphere of awareness and your level of alertness.
My first advice would be to develop a gratitude practice. When I first chose to establish a gratitude practice, I had the goal to pick up 5 daily things to be grateful for and I didn’t have any structure about it. Some days I chose to write it in whichever place and some days I didn’t. Eventually I saw the difference in the whole well being of writing it, every day in the same media. There is science behind the powerful brain connections that have been made by consciously and intentionally choosing to take time to write it even if it is on an electronic device. I do it now everyday after writing on my ‘I am journal’ and it allows me to focus on all the ‘blessings’ or you can call things that ‘are working.’ Regardless of what you choose to call it, mood uplifting is very valuable and reachable with gratitude. Now looking back I can’t believe there were days I struggle on which things to be grateful for and that I only chose 5.
The previous leads into my second advice: remind yourself that as you learn, grow and evolve you are becoming a different person with a different mindset. These might sound very basic, however in the example that I gave about my gratitude journal, if I forget this second advice I would be judging my past actions made under a different mindset with today’s mindset. An important part of developing self-leadership is being grateful for who you are now and sending loving thoughts toward your past self, trusting you did the most you could, where you were at and with what you had available at that time and developing the commitment to act from the best of your skills, abilities and intentions from now on.
My third advice would be whichever challenge you perceive you endured, commit to ask: Which is the lesson here? Many times people complain that they experience in some way or the other the same challenges over and over again and what is happening is that life is giving you the opportunity to learn something that could transform your life and your resentment for the experience is leading you into a closed mind and lack of gratitude. When you look for the lesson be aware of the emotions that are around the answer and if there’s no gratitude you can be sure there is something more to learn.
Before we go, maybe you can tell us a bit about your parents and what you feel was the most impactful thing they did for you?
As I was for the first time in a dental office I became very curious about some instruments on an open drawer that later I ended up learning were for surgery on another patient. After that appointment I told my parents I wanted to become a dentist and they said yes and they encouraged me to go all for it. There was a catch that I wasn’t aware of, my parent’s salary was very little to afford all the expenses related to such a career. My parents focused on long term possibilities to approach the situation and what started as my dream became our dream. I was taught the importance of saving and I did it for years with the goal to pay for my own studies.
While I was studying, my father once took the day off to go to ask for support from the University with the economic burden we were dealing with. My mom went to her company to look for support too. Even though my father didn’t get any money from the doors he was willing to go after, a new level of love and respect for them was developed over time.
After I graduated I found out how my mom dealt with others making fun of the goal. They never told me that my dream was impossible therefore, with their great support I became a dentist and I will always be grateful for that because that encouragement inspired me to keep going when things got tough.
Some lessons here:
1. The dream becomes a goal when you start to take action even if it’s small, like saving just a few dollars.
2. The bigger the goal, the bigger the support that will be needed.
3. It’s okay to feel fear while pursuing a big goal, just avoid that your fears kill other people’s dreams or your own.
Contact Info:
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dra.raquel.rubin/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DRARAQUELRUBIN1
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/drraquelrubinspeaker/
- Twitter: https://twitter.com/DraRaquelRubin
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCDIUDDqsiacXV3r9lzJU_lA
- Other: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CCWzTqshH7g
Image Credits
I DRA. RAQUEL RUBIN claim full ownership of the photos. I paid for all the photos I am in and I took all the remaining photos.
so if you or someone you know deserves recognition please let us know here.
